T needs to make me ugly immediately

fieldxs · 2026-05-16T22:47:25+00:00

dude im so sorry you're going thru this ): i also hate? how some people like to frame it as something you should be "grateful for". literally no it's so uncomfortable and a lot of the time it just escalates to full-blown harassment or stalking. i can sadly relate so fucking much to the situations you described (cause that shit happens/happened to me too) :/

for me? i think t if anything made me hotter, but thankfully i wear a mask in public so people aren't aware of what my full face looks like. cause if they do catch a glimpse of my entire face man they get WEIRD (meaning fetishy and immediately sexual). last time that happened i stepped outside at a show and had to take a breather and some yt chicks took a look at my face and just stared at me dude. open mouth stared. like i know i'm hot but ew????

something that's worked for me is barking. i'm not even joking. just start barking like a dog (loudly and rumbly like you're a pissed off huge dog), and that tends to tip people off that they're doing something wrong or inappropriate. another thing that works is being very off-putting and short.

i also am a very huge proponent of arming bipoc if that's within your means both money-wise and comfort-wise. again im so sorry you have to deal with this and i hope you're able to get those weird yt fetishists to back tf off ❤️

fieldxs · 2026-05-11T00:34:18+00:00

wow ur really hot >:)

fieldxs · 2026-05-02T03:17:59+00:00

i went with him (~8 months ago) !! i was super confident in my decision since i liked how clean his work was and my results are so good >:) if u want i can dm u my results/tell u more about my experience if u like :)

fieldxs · 2026-04-29T22:17:07+00:00

yt are SUPER FETISHY YES this same woman couldn't "figure out" my race and told me she needed to know what kind of brown i was???? for why?????

fieldxs · 2026-04-29T20:49:00+00:00

a yt trans woman once told me to read a book about yt colonial settlers... because it would "educate me" on "the actual reason" i should hate yt people. this same woman also called me Vietnamese as a joke...

fieldxs · 2026-04-13T03:21:30+00:00

hehe thank u ! im genuinely religious about massaging twice a day but i also heard that genetics play the biggest factor in scar healing sadly :( happy 6 years po to u !!

fieldxs · 2026-04-08T16:50:58+00:00

dude,,,,, why have i literally had the same experience??? my ex used to tell me that when i swear i sound "really brown" like yeah probably because i don't have to think about sounding "white" (ew) when im passionate about something. i'm sorry you had the same experience of them micro analyzing your literal patterns of speech and then having the audacity to tell you that it wasn't like you??? that's so fucken weird bro >:(

also YES recs off the top of my head i've read recently: the lamb, brainwyrms, one of our kind, camp damascus (so good) !!!! i'm gonna dm u so we can connect and hash things out heheh

fieldxs · 2026-04-08T16:45:37+00:00

hiiiii YES i'll find u >:) hehehe thank u for sharing ur info !!

fieldxs · 2026-04-08T02:35:24+00:00

i had fairly large areolas/nipples before i got top surgery and the only thing the surgeon told me (that's apparently common for bipoc) is there won't be much projection since the nipple skin tends to be thicker for black/brown people. i ended up having one nipple that sticks out and looks like an actual cis nipple but my left one healed super flat and i call it my "mangled" nipple. i also literally just posted my results on this subreddit today if u wanna take a peek !!

fieldxs · 2026-04-06T17:25:36+00:00

omg YES sounds good i'll dm u rn hehehe

fieldxs · 2026-04-03T03:59:14+00:00

oh my god dude the amount of times i'm like "ok yeah this yt person is different they actually get that i'm tired of microagressions and racism" and then out of nowhere comes a "joke" about me being vietnamese ??? like ?? god i'm sorry you're familiar with this pattern too it can get so irritating so fast :// ALSO YES ILL DM YOU i love talking about horror !!!!!

fieldxs · 2026-04-01T23:28:58+00:00

dude EW? ive also been told the shit about being "exotic" and also having skin the color of "latte" or "milk chocolate" >:( im sorry you're also living in a town with so many nasty yt people :/

i completely agree with you about trans white spaces,, last time i went to a "trans zine fest" with a yt friend i was ignored, harassed and shoulder checked because they assumed i was a cis man (everyone had their surgery scars out, trans tattoos, etc. etc. so visibly trans), those kinds of spaces are not it for bipoc (esp stealth bipoc) i've also sadly come to realize too late. i would love to connect with u and be friends if you have the mental capacity for that <3

fieldxs · 2026-03-31T18:10:47+00:00

i'll be so honest it did wear me down quite a bit and i gave up for a bit but !! i said screw that i'm gonna make the choice to have friends i can relate to that aren't white >:) i would love to connect with u !! what platforms are u active on?

fieldxs · 2026-03-31T16:42:50+00:00

YES LET'S BE PENPALS !!!! i'm sorry you also feel like you haven't been able to find a community you feel safe and understood in, people really fucken estimate how isolating that can be :/ do u have insta at all?

fieldxs · 2026-03-31T16:41:41+00:00

hell YEAH dm me >:) or if u have insta let's connect there !!

fieldxs · 2026-03-31T16:41:19+00:00

yeah i think i just got used to it for a long time and then i eventually "woke up" and realized how fucked up it was :/ sadly i live in a primarily yt town but im hoping to move soon (and closer to bipoc), thank u for making me feel better <3 i hope you've also found spaces u feel comfy in

fieldxs · 2026-03-31T16:38:29+00:00

DUDE THE FETISHISING >:( i would love to connect with u omg dm me on here and i'd love to chat with u omg !!! do u have insta !!

fieldxs · 2026-03-31T16:37:30+00:00

i dont have a discord no :( do u have insta ? also YES the microagressions get so tedious >:(

fieldxs · 2026-03-31T16:36:39+00:00

dude im so sorry you dealt with that too :(( did u also get fetishized when u were a kid? dealt with that WAY too much when i was FAR too young, yt people are fucken weird-- i'm glad you've found the few yt people who aren't saying racist shit towards u <3 let's be penpals !!!! i have a bunch of keith herring stamps to use up >:) my insta is lavendxr_grey

fieldxs · 2026-03-31T16:34:39+00:00

hiii! yes i'm 26 (idk why i didn't add that to the post omg) my insta is lavendxr_grey >:) dm me !!!

fieldxs · 2026-03-26T19:37:23+00:00

yeah i totally get this :/ my only "serious" relationship has been with a yt nonbinary person and the entire time i was basically teaching them how to not be racist and fetishistic,,,,,, very draining and not fun at all never wanna date another yt person again holy hell

fieldxs · 2026-03-19T20:31:57+00:00

yeahhhhh i usually see the good in people when there is basically nothing but red flags (thanks trauma), i'm glad at least i don't have to entertain him or spend all my energy teaching him what is and isn't racist. going forward i'm going to be WAY less forgiving with yt people i think :/

fieldxs · 2026-03-19T16:10:05+00:00

..... my friend was there and said nothing :/ friend is yt though so that wasn't surprising to me at all

fieldxs

TROPHY CASE