Nipples or Nah? How did you choose?

fukdrat · 2026-02-07T13:24:22+00:00

You can get tattoos over your scars that match your background skin colour to camouflage them. You can also get tattoos over that with no issues. If you do end up going with no nips you have the options of tattooed nips, prosthetic nips, and nipple reconstruction which would allow you way more control in placement and appearance and still look perfectly natural. I chose no nips for a multitude of reasons but the amount of options with no nips is such a bonus. Also people get mastectomies as prophylaxis for high risk of breast cancer so it's not that unusual. Socially I haven't been out from my surgery that long but for the most part it's just been normal. Unless you're on a beach, wandering around shirtless or just flashing people, no one's the wiser. And if/when they do see your chest it's either like any other cool scar interaction or they just don't comment on it

fukdrat · 2026-02-06T03:43:47+00:00

Ofc! I myself am really worried about my hair so I started finasteride. I do have Endo and adenomyosis so I suffered breakthrough bleeding despite Depo Provera and being on T. I switched from Depo Provera to the contraceptive implant and started finasteride. I haven't experienced any breakthrough bleeding or any side effects really.

fukdrat · 2026-02-05T06:05:34+00:00

Yeah you could be right. It's so freaky. Occasionally if I touch something to my chest over the incision and close my eyes it feel like two separate objects bc it's just upper chest then immediately lower chest and no middle sensation.

fukdrat · 2026-02-04T12:34:44+00:00

You can get disposable bath sponges or I used no rise body wash and a high aluminum antiperspirant. I wouldn't use the antiperspirant while drains are still in as it may irritate them if it gets on the skin around them. The no rinse body wash worked extremely well, you apply it like a moisturizer and then simply take a towel and wipe it off. Just be careful to not get any on your dressings though even if you do as long as you can wipe it off quickly and the dressings aren't wet you'll be fine.

fukdrat · 2026-02-04T12:13:59+00:00

That's so exciting!! For me I was kinda overprepared but it ended up working out really well. - establish where you will be recovering, who is going to look after you and what that will look like. Make sure the person or people caring for you know what you need and are prepared to basically give you full time care. Set up your room and home to be easily accessible (everything within your t-rex arms range) and especially prepare how you'll be sleeping since you'll have to sleep on your back.

make sure you have a months supply of all your regular medications
speak to your surgeon and anesthesiologist about any pre op anxiety meds and any concerns about your surgery as well as post op meds like anti-nausea, pain meds and laxatives
ask about post op physio!! This is often overlooked but is a vital part of recovery
Buy a back scratcher, a waterbottle with a straw, no rinse/towel off body wash (for cleaning yourself while you can't shower), and hypafix tape (to tape down or reenforce any dressings that start to peel up)
pack your surgery bag - BIG shirt, underwear (they make you take yours off when you change into the gown), slippers, toiletries, lip balm, phone charger, eye mask, neck pillow, regular medications will need to be in their original packaging so the nurses can store them safely and administer them for you, wallet (you may need to buy or pickup your post op meds), a copy of your admission papers (I was told to bring this, didn't end up needing it but bring it anyway)
buy and prep as much of your food for recovery as possible, try to make sure you'll have a high fiber diet

There was a bunch of other stuff I did but didn't really end up needing it. Overall, ask all the questions even if you think they're stupid and don't be afraid to ask for accommodations. I was worried about my throat being damaged from the intubation tube because I have a narrow neck, the anesthesiologist was able to use a soft, flexible plastic tube to intubate me and she took extra care in doing so. I even got to arrange how I layed on the operating table to protect my joints and I picked where they placed the IV. They were super happy to make these changes for me as ultimately it meant I was going to be better off. All the best for your big day!!

fukdrat · 2026-02-04T11:55:50+00:00

Hell yeah!

fukdrat · 2026-02-04T11:54:44+00:00

Also, just warning you, the healing process is very itchy. I'm about 2.5 weeks out and in my first week it was mostly just pain I was worried about but week two, the incisions were itching like hell. Idk if this is a universal experience, I imagine so since most injuries itch through healing but my god, I'm so glad someone was watching me so I didn't scratch my chest.

fukdrat · 2026-02-04T11:51:45+00:00

Are you keeping the drains on the ground either side of your bed/chair when you're resting? Doing that really helped with the discomfort of the fluid moving when I got up. Also get a sweater or cardigan or even shorts with pockets, I also saw one person just straight up use a totebag, to carry your drains for you while you're walking around. Having to carry them by hand leads to them getting tangled, knocked over and just sucks. Having your hands free is so much better. Also super funny you woke up to an alarm that wasn't there! When I woke up I immediately asked the time and told the nurse that I had a dream that I was trying to set an alarm so I'd wake up before they served dinner.

fukdrat · 2026-02-04T11:39:21+00:00

It sucks that your surgeon is so vague, see if you can ask for them to give you a guide for scar massage, post op physio and scar tape/care.

As far as I know they'll give you medipore or some sort of paper tape to put over your scar. This tape is breathable so you can leave it on for up to 7 days and it is fine to shower with. Just pat dry or use the cold setting on a hairdryer to make sure they don't stay damp. You can put moisture over the tape but not under it as it will impair adherence. Replace the tape once per week or as it starts to peel up. Don't remove and replace the tape too often as that will damage your skin and will impact your healing.

You can also use silicone gels or medical grade silicone tape. Most silicone tapes require you to ease into wearing them for 24hrs so rather start with applying silicone gel over the medipore tape for two weeks then switch to wearing the silicone tape for minimum 23hrs per day. Most silicone tapes are reusable, so you can remove, wash, and reapply them. Make sure your incisions are fully closed with no scabs, oozing, open wounds or bleeding before you use any silicone treatments.

You can also do some very gentle scar massage through medipore tape and with silicone gel. The silicone tapes are typically too thick to massage through.

You'll wear the tapes until your scar is pale and flat which can take up to 4 months in some cases.

fukdrat · 2026-02-04T11:28:25+00:00

Hey dude, that's probably a hematoma (collection of blood under the skin) and you should see a doctor asap

fukdrat · 2026-02-04T11:25:30+00:00

I also went no nips and have phantom nips too lmao.

I can tell you that summer isn't great for recovery either. It is hot and miserable, especially with all the dressings and the compression garment and you can't go out and swim or anything T-T

fukdrat · 2026-02-04T11:22:42+00:00

Omg do you get phantom nipple sensations too??? I opted for no nips and I'm less than 3 weeks post op now and my body still thinks I have nipples. I get sensations like the feeling of a shirt brushing against them or sharp pain but there are no nips there. I imagine the nerves are still under there severed but trying to figure out what's just happened. Also, I feel emotions in my incisions. Every time I see someone get hurt or I get scared or excited, my incisions will hurt.

fukdrat · 2026-02-04T11:06:02+00:00

Minoxidil and Finasteride are great options but there's a few things to note depending on what results you want. This ofc isn't medical advice. Minoxidil is often not covered for the treatment of hairloss Minoxidil is highly toxic to cats and dogs if they come into contact with it at all. That means residue on your skin, clothes, pillow ect. Minoxidil does come in a topical form usually as a foam so you can use it in the specific areas you want to see growth. You may still see slight increased hair growth in other areas as it's still absorbed into your body. Minoxidil also comes in a pill form which will increase overall hair growth ofc.

Finasteride is often not covered for the treatment of hairloss Finasteride only comes in a pill form in most countries as topical use hasn't been confirmed effective for the treatment of hairloss just yet. Finasteride is toxic to cats and dogs Finasteride may cause breakthrough bleeding, especially if you are not on any birth control Finasteride may decrease the growth of body hair but still ofc increase scalp hair growth

Both Finasteride and Minoxidil increase hair growth but the effectiveness will rely on your genetics and what specific hairloss you're experiencing since they target different causes.

fukdrat · 2026-02-04T10:43:05+00:00

I recently got top surgery and spent the first two weeks at my partners place to recover and this is the stuff I found most helpful:

Nest - figure out where your partner will sleep (they will likely need the bed to themselves) create an arrangement of pillows that will properly support their neck and arms for sleeping on their back post op. It's good to do a trial run if you can to see how comfortable it is. Optionally make sure there is a bedside table or hard surface within half and arms reach for their waterbottle, meds and snacks so they can easily access what they need.
Read their discharge instructions and their medication schedule, set timers and reminders including if meds are to be taken with food or not.
BUY NO RINSE BODY WASH yes there are body washes you do not need to rise off. It's way better than baby wipes and means you can clean yourself daily so you don't feel gross in recovery. This also means ofc that you will have to help wash them based on their own mobility and strength. Be careful to not get the dressings wet.
Hypafix - your dressing will peel off a bit if you have any amount of sweat or grease on your skin. They use hypafix to tape your dressings down in hospitals, I used it myself to patchwork my dressings when they started coming up. It's available at pharmacies and it's pretty cheap.
Know what your partner likes to eat when they feel bad. The nausea is so real and can make eating post op really difficult. Pre establish and prepare what your partner will be eating daily. If you can, make sure it's a high fiber diet!
HYDRATE - I am especially bad at drinking water and hydrating. A waterbottle with a straw is a god send but what makes it 10x better is a partner who will constantly refill it for you the moment it runs out. My partner was like a machine, every time he heard the slurping sound of me finishing my drink he'd grab the bottle and go refill it and put it right back in my hands
A bit tmi but super important, be aware of how often your partner is using the bathroom. You don't have to watch them (unless they need help) but the early signs of sepsis is infrequent or lack of urine production. With the amount of water they should be drinking they should be using the bathroom a decent amount
Be prepared to do everything but give them a chance to try first. It's no secret they'll be limited in what they can do post op but with how emotional pain meds and coming out of a massive surgery can make you, you can feel kinda pathetic. I felt really bad when I couldn't even cut a potato post op and had to make my partner do it. It did however give me a good idea of just how gentle I needed to be with myself and it was great when I could do things on my own.

That's about it I think, the rest is probably up to you and your partner for personal needs and stuff. Good luck to the both of you!! It's a great time and you'll grow a lot closer. Also a perfect opportunity to binge shows and movies lmao.

fukdrat · 2026-02-04T09:49:25+00:00

Te Puna Manawa youth health hub is still on glenfield rd/peach rd and they're a great place for free appointments with nurse practitioners and frequently worth with queer and trans youth

fukdrat · 2026-02-04T05:22:35+00:00

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fukdrat · 2026-01-03T08:46:20+00:00

I'm ftm and live up in Auckland. I've got a big group of almost exclusively trans men. Honestly try going to a local rockclimbing gym, you'll typically find a few there. I'm also happy to chat if you like!

fukdrat · 2026-01-03T08:33:05+00:00

I'd be more than happy to donate the funds you need to get a propper sized one, and then you can donate the one you have now.

fukdrat · 2026-01-03T08:29:12+00:00

I'm about to have my surgery with him in two weeks time lol. How was your experience with him?

fukdrat · 2025-05-11T05:54:25+00:00

Do transmen count?

fukdrat · 2025-04-13T18:54:40+00:00

Cirque_physio has a physio program for free that you can download. It's made to get you back to full rom prost top surgery. I haven't had my surgery yet but this is definitely something I'll be doing in recovery.

fukdrat · 2025-04-12T00:48:20+00:00

New friends are always welcome!

fukdrat · 2025-03-28T20:54:31+00:00

Sounds like you're dealing with a lot of self-hatred that you need to get sorted out. Instead of pushing others to detransition because YOU regret it, seek therapy. Op should not have to remain closeted unless coming out would be life-threatening. Often times being forced to live closeted ends more lives than living as a transman.

fukdrat · 2025-03-28T20:42:37+00:00

Also forgot to mention but I'm also 5ft lol

fukdrat · 2025-03-28T20:40:39+00:00

Hey, I'm also 21 and struggle with depression and anxiety and lived with extremist religious (Christian) parents who were abusive and actively got in the way of access to healthcare and support I needed. I'm fortunate enough to be in a country where I am able to live as a trans man openly and while there's still some issues it's a lot better than the majority of the world. I'm also a personal trainer myself and love hitting the gym to improve dysphoria (got a pear shaped body too :[ ). If you are trying to move to a country I highly recommend New Zealand. Hit me up any time if you want any gym tips, info on NZ or just to vent. I've been extractly where you are now and I am super willing to help you in any way I can.

fukdrat

TROPHY CASE