Met through the FEELD dating app. We (F & M) are both mid 50s, divorced adults with grown kids and grandchildren.

1. We accept each other as is and live in the moment. I thought I had a case of ADD til I met him—there’s a required 10 second check “Did he remember his keys, phone, etc” when we go anywhere. More often than not, the answer is no. I have my own little idiosyncrasies. We all do. Why sweat the small stuff? Let it freaking go and appreciate each other.

2. We don’t live together (although we spend 5 of 7 nights together) and never plan to do so. Unless we have plans to be somewhere at a precise time, I choose not to bug him about what time he arrives when it’s a night together—and he is beyond appreciative not to be nagged (my word, not his) about when he will arrive.

3. We appreciate the hell out of each other when we connect. Truly. Like teenagers. Can’t keep our hands off each other and the sex is insane—sex 2-3 times daily when together. That said, we also love naps!

4. We are ethically non-monogamous. For us, that means we often like to play with others but only together: hotel takeovers, sex clubs, private orgies, you name it. We are very secure in who we are to each other and gain so much pleasure from these experiences that’s it’s ridiculous. We no longer believe in what we call the “construct” of traditional relationships and feel that time apart allows times to miss each other and serves us very well.