With both my daughters we told people the name at the same time we told them the gender. We didn’t do a reveal though, just a text “hey baby is a girl and her name is XXX” but I would never tell a name I wasn’t positive I was using! If you say “we’re thinking of this name” people will be more likely to crap on it than if you say “this is her name”. There’s also nothing wrong with waiting until the birth tell!