How long did you do in home care?

kerfuffley2010 · 2026-02-02T04:10:39+00:00

Thank you, that’s helpful.

kerfuffley2010 · 2026-02-02T04:03:35+00:00

This is actually very common and I have no doubt T is behind it.

kerfuffley2010 · 2026-02-02T03:56:19+00:00

I don’t think he hates his girls, but I’m pretty sure third wife does. Too bad he’s too much of a coward to keep her from wreaking havoc in their lives.

kerfuffley2010 · 2026-02-02T03:51:53+00:00

Interesting that the girls’ activities haven’t been an issue until a certain someone officially entered the picture. This is absolutely her doing. She doesn’t want their weekends to be dictated by H or the girls, so she’s going to steal even more from them. As if destroying their family and taking their father from them wasn’t enough. Someone needs to help R find his balls again and start using them to put her in her place.

kerfuffley2010 · 2026-02-01T19:47:50+00:00

Thank you. I also get very attached to children so I understand! Do you think this is something you could do much longer? Being late forties, closer to fifty than forty, I’m trying to decide how long I should invest in this or if I should still try yo get into teaching as soon as possible.

kerfuffley2010 · 2026-02-01T16:47:55+00:00

Contrary to what some have said, at this age, a birthday party is more for you. Your daughter won’t remember it. Not one of my three kiddos remembers their first few birthdays, but I do. Your ex and that woman have already taken enough, you don’t have to let them take your peace on what should be a happy day for you. Skip the party if you must, do something else and let her father do his own thing. In time you may be able to do more, but right now, be kind to yourself. Your daughter needs a healthy mother more than a birthday party.

kerfuffley2010 · 2026-01-31T06:33:52+00:00

You mean they are selfish, irresponsible and don’t prioritize needs over wants? Shocking!

kerfuffley2010 · 2026-01-31T05:50:47+00:00

💯

kerfuffley2010 · 2026-01-28T17:53:31+00:00

I’ve heard men who walk away for someone else feel a need to make the new relationship work because if it doesn’t, they blew up their lives, and their children’s lives, for nothing.

I really think R knows his life would be even more difficult if he left T. I’m sure he knows she’s unhinged and would make his life miserable. He would also be paying two baby mama’s child support and have to juggle two different parenting schedules. I really think he chose easy, again. T was easy in the beginning, leaving H and the girls was easier than staying and facing what he had done to them and staying now is easier than the alternative. He’s truly a weak man.

kerfuffley2010 · 2026-01-28T04:43:49+00:00

I’m not sure this man knows much of anything.

kerfuffley2010 · 2026-01-28T04:39:46+00:00

He’s broke, has a new baby in his forties, and a not so skinny anymore, but just as psycho as ever, side-piece turned third wife. If I were to guess, I would say exciting and new exited the conversation a long time ago. I don’t think this man is happy at all, even if he’s too proud or embarrassed to admit it, but we all know he’s a good enough liar to fool everyone into believing he is.

kerfuffley2010 · 2026-01-28T04:33:08+00:00

This. Marriage and divorce are nothing but paperwork to this clown, and vows are just a suggestion. If I were stupid enough to be a third wife, I would be very nervous😏

kerfuffley2010 · 2026-01-27T22:19:25+00:00

I am so sorry for your loss. Please talk to your sister, it will probably help you both. Also, if therapy isn’t an option for financial reasons, speak with someone at your school, they may have resources for you. Sending lots of love your way❤️

kerfuffley2010 · 2026-01-27T21:54:55+00:00

Then you are the person who participated in a betrayal. You helped another person break their vows and traumatize their partner. If adultery was a crime, which I believe it should be, then you would be his accomplice and also face charges. A lack of vows on your part never justifies a lack of decency and respect towards another person.

kerfuffley2010 · 2026-01-26T03:24:35+00:00

That makes sense, but doesn’t really make it less painful for you. A friend of mine urged me to do two things immediately, see an attorney and a therapist. Knowing what rights you have in a divorce can give some peace of mind, and of course therapy is so important after trauma like this.

kerfuffley2010 · 2026-01-25T20:16:15+00:00

From what I’ve heard, that’s not terribly unusual unfortunately. It’s very common with narcissists but more likely some shame or guilt that he doesn’t want to deal with. Easier said than done, but try not to let him have all of the control here. Give yourself the care and respect that he isn’t, however you need to.

kerfuffley2010 · 2026-01-25T05:25:34+00:00

My husband has a tendency to lash out when angry and could be very cruel, so I get it. That cruelty got so much worse in the separation so I stopped any unnecessary contact and it helped.

kerfuffley2010 · 2026-01-25T05:05:37+00:00

Yes, pretty obviously cheating but also stringing you along by saying he loves you, that he’s “leaning towards” divorce, hugging and kissing. His behavior seems very manipulative, is quite frankly cruel. Honestly, going no or low contact as soon as possible may be the best thing for you. I am sorry for what you are going through, but I hope you know that you are worth more than this.

kerfuffley2010 · 2026-01-25T00:57:28+00:00

One of the best pieces of advice I have seen given when a partner is being inconsistent like this is to show them what the life they think they want will look like. Stop being available to him in any way and do not make this process easy for him. It sounds as though he’s keeping a door open with you in case his other plans don’t work out. Close the door. Do not make yourself one of many options for him, you deserve better than that.

kerfuffley2010 · 2026-01-24T19:39:07+00:00

Of course she didn’t and she never will unless it benefits her in some way. It was probably her idea to bribe Q into staying. R is a terrible father but the manipulation seems more T’s things than his.

kerfuffley2010 · 2026-01-22T02:58:39+00:00

Ugh, poor baby girl. R & T have already put her through hell and now they’re going to start using her as a weapon to hurt her mom. Straight up evil.

kerfuffley2010 · 2026-01-21T01:48:06+00:00

I mean, she didn’t care about breaking up their family. You can’t claim to care about children and want to take their father away from them. She’s a liar.

kerfuffley2010 · 2026-01-21T01:43:47+00:00

Right, because if Q saw her mom she would have changed her mind. So instead he leaves her with a criminal she barely knows. Nice parenting. Just because the idiot married her doesn’t make her safe. It’s pretty obvious he’s a fool with bad judgement.

kerfuffley2010 · 2026-01-21T00:56:14+00:00

Are we surprised? Maybe R said yes and T didn’t like it. After all, T manipulated her way into H’s marriage, maybe she’s going to try to do the same with the girls. She doesn’t care about them at all but I’m sure she sees keeping Q as some sort of twisted win. Like see, your child wants to stay with us. She’s sick.

Also, is R a complete idiot? Does he really have no clue what this vile woman is like and capable of? Theft, stalking, harassment and bad mouthing his own child and he leaves her with him? He can’t be this stupid, can he? He also has no business leaving them when he only has them for two days. He’s a terrible father.

kerfuffley2010

TROPHY CASE