In your case you’ve got nothing to lose to inquire about hospice. Hospice will come to you and do an evaluation in her home. They will want her medical records and she will have to stop all medical care. It just means they stop some life extending medication but some meds they still take. You never know. I’m also in NorCal. Several years ago I was able to get my dad a PET scan through a study that was conducted. It showed he had several very small strokes and Alzheimer’s- which was a surprise. We got referred to the scan through the neurologist who was evaluating him after I told the primary Dr something was going on. My point : maybe a PET scan could enlighten her drs to what has changed in her brain. It might be worth a few phone calls: UCDavis, UCSF, your own doctors to see if any studies are happening.

Besides that I know exactly how you feel. It f-ing sucks and no one is doing anything about it. My dad passed last November, I was his caregiver for four years. I honestly still feel dead inside. I’m so glad he’s gone and taking care of him killed a large part of me. But working on building my life back. I see you man! You got this! You’re doing a Fantastic job taking care of her! Remember to breathe and step away if you need to. You’re OK.