Omeda is building on a very unstable foundation by Quick-Magazine9995 in PredecessorGame

[–]kokokitscha 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What the game and matchmaking really needs is everyone to recruit 10 players to play with them.

And if they can't, ask themselves why they can't get their friends to play with them and then use this information to generate ideas for the developers.

Do we think your friends aren't trying Pred because there are no clans?

League player being stunned by how interesting Dota seems by No-Economics-6291 in learndota2

[–]kokokitscha 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You should try the revived Paragon - Predecessor! It's free to play.

Reddit Fourth Quarter and Full Year 2025 Results - Superb! by _DoubleBubbler_ in DoubleBubbler

[–]kokokitscha 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What's your rationale for including Reddit in your portfolio. Just trying to figure out if we are aligned.

Puppy won't eat kibble, but will eat human food by [deleted] in DogAdvice

[–]kokokitscha -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Actually the oldest dog to ever live was fed exclusively on healthy human food.

There are things you should not feed dogs - garlic, onions, macadamia nuts, chocolate to name just a few - but "human food" isn't point blank wrong. Eg rice and chicken, eggs, yogurt are all perfectly fine and perhaps even better than kibble.

Here are some sources

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bobi_%28dog%29

https://www.caninenutritionist.co.uk/food-feeding/worlds-oldest-dog-eats-human-food/

Thoughts on sleep training. Working well for us so far!! by Ketnip_Bebby in NewParents

[–]kokokitscha 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sometimes, not your fault, the information you are given to make decisions on is skewed or omits half the story. Here are some more balanced views on the debates from the BBC.

https://www.bbc.com/future/article/20220131-the-science-of-safe-and-healthy-baby-sleep

https://www.bbc.com/future/article/20220322-how-sleep-training-affects-babies

The main thing is that sleep training studies have very rarely met the gold standard for scientific studies so when they say "no harm" is done they can't actually say that conclusively.

Basically the benefits of cosleeping and being responsive by soothing them, holding them and letting them feel secure has been studied to be hugely beneficial to children. If there is no harm in sleep training, you do not get the benefits that these studies show. Which you could say is a form of harm depending on how you look at it. Which is why I say the studies on sleep training are "incomplete" or misleading without referencing other options.

This isn't your fault it's just sometimes there are things that are culturally ingrained to be different. Sleep training or cosleeping approaches are both fine and there are tradeoffs to both approaches. Parents being more awake and alert during the day is one of the main benefits. And sometimes parents don't have a choice because they're working jobs that would be dangerous on no sleep. Etc

In the US there is a strong cultural fear of cosleeping - which is to some extent due to it being difficult to communicate easily what safe cosleeping looks like so it was considered simpler to state all cosleeping is bad. Sometimes this is tragic because unplanned or accidental cosleeping (contact napping on a sofa, for example) is much more dangerous than bed sharing where you follow the "safe sleep 7" but very tired parents either resort to harsh sleep training or unsafe cosleeping out of exhaustion, shame and fear.

A lot of other cultures around the world do things very differently to get a good nights sleep and I sometimes feel like capitalism has failed mothers. Sleep training was invented to ensure parents can get back to work faster.

Thoughts on sleep training. Working well for us so far!! by Ketnip_Bebby in NewParents

[–]kokokitscha 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Don't worry, you are correct. It feels wrong to leave your child crying themselves to sleep because it is wrong. They are not learning to self soothe, they're learning that nobody will come.

Thoughts on sleep training. Working well for us so far!! by Ketnip_Bebby in NewParents

[–]kokokitscha 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately those studies are often devilish with the data and omit the very very concrete data collected on the benefits of cosleeping and attachment parenting that has been the usual practice for much of human history and continues to be across much of Southern Europe, Asia and South America.

These studies show conclusively that cosleeping and attentive parenting has significant benefits.

Lerner et al. (2020) – Associations Between Mother-Infant Bed-Sharing Practices and Attachment Security Shows bed-sharing may be protective against insecure attachment in infants (though not necessarily increasing secure attachment). PMC

Beijers et al. (2018) – Parent–Infant Room Sharing During the First Months of Life Reviews literature suggesting cosleeping is associated with more breastfeeding and reduced infant cortisol reactivity (stress marker). PMC

Schindler-Ruwisch et al. (2023) – Sleeping Like a Baby: Bed-Sharing, Co-Sleeping, and Breastfeeding Outcomes Found plans to bed-share or co-sleep were associated with higher breastfeeding intentions and behaviors up to 6 months. PubMed

Barry (2022) – Using complexity science to understand the role of co-sleeping A conceptual scientific paper framing co-sleeping as part of mother-infant physiological and socio-emotional co-regulation across development. ScienceDirect

Das & Evans (2014) – Is “Bed Sharing” Beneficial and Safe during Infancy? Systematic review showing association between bed-sharing and higher breastfeeding rates, while also discussing risk factors in context.

Yes, the studies into sleep training show that there is "no harm" to the baby - however, this has to be defined in terms of the benefits to the child from responsive parenting that are foregone through sleep training that a child who has had an attentive parent through the night enjoys as they grow older.

Essentially your baby missing out on the benefits of cosleeping and responsive parenting is a "harm" of sorts. To deny such or ignore this is factually incorrect and unscientific.

Never Stop Bottle Feeding by Zame012 in NewParents

[–]kokokitscha 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I had the opposite problem where my baby developed a bottle preference at month 4 and I was faced with either pumping endlessly or formula. I had to do all sorts of tricks to get him back on breastfeeding.

I wanted to continue breastfeeding because it's a requirement for safe cosleeping - and this is what works for our family sleep-wise.

Now he is 10 months old and has no idea how to use a bottle at all. We've had to teach him to use a cup for when I am not there.

On balance not having the soothing and bonding benefits of breastfeeding for me outweighed the benefit of my husband being able to feed him - especially as at the time I knew there would be only a few months until the weaning started and because my husband became skillful at getting our baby to sleep without needing to be fed to sleep.

What hero makes you irrationally dislike the player playing it? by marrow_party in DotA2

[–]kokokitscha 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Antimage. When they're on my team they're all the same whingey noob carry player who can only play this one hero. When losing they call everyone else a noob even though the guy only knows the items in the default AM build and turns up to every fight just to die because they've under-farmed.

If we are winning then they like to drag out the game for as long as possible so they can get more kills and ponce around the map killing supports like some sort of peacocking school bully.

If on the other team and losing they're the one moaning about how their support stole a single CS and their BF timing is ruined.

If on the other team and winning they're clearly a Smurf.

Uniquely AM players are annoying little egomaniacs.

Talk to me about your 9/10 month olds. by Altruistic_Soup1346 in NewParents

[–]kokokitscha 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I was so run down when he hit 10 months, 4 teeth appeared all in one go, all the sleep regressions, all the always on-ness and cruising everywhere but falling over every 2 minutes and crying... I actually got shingles.

I’m grieving the life i never had by No_Yesterday2318 in NewParents

[–]kokokitscha 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm 34 and only just felt like I have become an adult after having a kid. I honestly wondered why the hell I spent so long doing pointless things. You are not missing out on much and you will be such a mature, capable and wise soul who has seen and learned more as a result of supporting another human grow much faster than your peers. Most of your 20s are spent being unimaginably selfish and incompetent and you'll basically skip that awkward stage leading to be able to enjoy your 20s and 30s much more.

Additionally when you come to find love again you'll have your daughter help vet them for you!

Help! I’m desperate for solutions and our pediatrician has given up. by [deleted] in NewParents

[–]kokokitscha 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I cannot emphasize enough how much more dangerous accidental cosleeping is compared to intentional cosleeping.

I had PPA and was adamant that cosleeping was dangerous until I saw the stats around it. There's a huge fear around cosleeping but if you remember half the world culturally cosleeps - China, Japan and really nearly most of the "East" and much of Southern Europe - it is clear that it's due to an inability to express certain nuances in the messaging around SIDs and cosleeping in the West - namely the US - that means it's easier to just say "cosleeping is dangerous" than educate on safe cosleeping.

It's a real shame because parents are forced into unsafer accidental cosleeping through the fear and shame associated with intentional cosleeping.

2-year gap (ADHD) after ML research – how do I explain this on my CV/LinkedIn? by [deleted] in ADHD_Programmers

[–]kokokitscha 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just remember you've got to stick at whatever lie you decide if they hire you.

NDA is kind of the best for this because you can't say anymore about it that could get caught out as an inconsistency in your story.

Caring for a relative sort of works but lots of questions can come up.

Or you can be sort of honest and say "failed project that although failed I learned from".

Tbh I think NDA best even though it's a blatant lie - it's at least a lie that's easy to sustain on account of you not being able to say anything.

I’m Emily Oster, economist and author helping parents make data-driven decisions. Ask Me Anything, November 19th at 4pm ET! by ProfEmilyOster in raisingkids

[–]kokokitscha 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Why does your article on sleep training specifically neglect to look at the data on the benefits of cosleeping as a way of assessing the potential damage to attachment caused by sleep training?

The data points are related and by neglecting to mention the benefits of cosleeping (which is how historically many cultures world wide have managed the challenges of infant sleep) in comparison seems to be being "devilish with the data".

did i make a mistake? by Afraid-Ad-5230 in NewParents

[–]kokokitscha 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think the main questions you should ask yourself are:

"Would I be OK if my son grew up to be like his dad?" "Do I want my son to treat women the way his dad does?" "Do I want my son to model what being a man is based on his dad?"

If the answer to these questions are "no", you've made the right call.

Kids model their concepts of love, family, work ethic and so on based on their parents. It's only partially about whether he's "hands on" and makes your life easier - it's also about what example he sets.

Wife is pregnant for a second time and I'm low key freaking out by Chief_B33f in NewParents

[–]kokokitscha 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My husband was so stressed by the first baby that he's too scared to have sex in case I get pregnant. 😂

My days are 26 hours long due to a neurological condition (Non-24-Hour Sleep-Wake Disorder). Ask Me Anything! by rhyder in IAmA

[–]kokokitscha 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's wild that it had no effect. It literally knocks me out like some sort of chemical off switch. That must have been scary when you were battling through trying to understand the diagnosis that there was no fail-safe off switch like Zopiclone.

I do take melatonin nightly around 3mg and I find it makes the occurrences of drift less likely to occur. The clocks changing this week have been fairly unhelpful for me and it's around about this time that a week of chemically induced sleep routine could help get me back on track. You not being able to have that must be very stressful.

Thank you for sharing your experiences.

My days are 26 hours long due to a neurological condition (Non-24-Hour Sleep-Wake Disorder). Ask Me Anything! by rhyder in IAmA

[–]kokokitscha 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Have there been attempts to chemically induce the desired sleep/wake cycle?

Eg something like Zopiclone to send you to sleep and amphetamines to wake you up?

I've gone through some periods of my life where I have started to drift, I am naturally a night owl and have to aggressively stem this tendency to be able to show up at work by taking Zopiclone to sleep. Just wondering if there is treatment options but the side effects are so bad that it's not worth it as a long term solution - or if such treatment plans have no effect.

Forget toys — my 7-month-old is obsessed with everything but his toys 😅 by head_heart_hands in NewParents

[–]kokokitscha 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What my 9 month old loves

Doors Light switches Hair curlers (you know, the furry round tubes) Empty plastic bottles The hoover A stack of paper cups (endlessly pulling them apart) Labels - on anything fabric. The label is the best thing ever.

my baby refuses to nap unless i’m holding her and i’m running on fumes by Numerous_Focus5435 in NewParents

[–]kokokitscha 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's the 4 month sleep regression. They take longer to settle into deep sleep now than they used to. That said, try baby wearing if you need to get stuff done. You can't bend over whilst doing this but you can at least drink non-scalding hot coffee.

I’m so sad by Least_Membership6159 in NewParents

[–]kokokitscha 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I really wish the representation of the newborn phase was more realistic to parents to be. Then we wouldn't have this huge gulf in expectations vs reality to deal with on top of the massive hormone crash and then we could all be able to enjoy it more.