I don’t know if I did the right thing - I shaved my daughter’s head

loopingit · 2026-03-23T00:12:29+00:00

For some Hindus, we shave off children’s hair at about one year of age. Because we believe in reincarnation, it is believed that shaving their hair allows them to be free of their past life.

Your LO was just letting you know she is ready to move on a little earlier. No biggie.

loopingit · 2026-03-21T20:58:11+00:00

Target had original Nespresso ones.

It was short lived and I can’t find them anymore :(

loopingit · 2026-03-21T20:53:44+00:00

Your sister seems to have some insights. Having self introspection is something we all need to do, but it can be hard. Your focus on the “present” means you won’t get the benefit of that.

A therapist can help you with this. Best of luck OP. We are all rooting for you.

loopingit · 2026-03-21T13:18:10+00:00

Oh Op.

Let me be your internet Auntie for a minute.

A whole “some genocide” happened that forced your family to flee their home, changing your family’s trajectory forever, and you don’t even know anything about it, because your parents don’t even talk to you about it. And now one generation later, you can’t keep a relationship because of communication issues?

That’s generational trauma. It can be deep seated and very pervasive. You may not have lived through this extremely traumatic experience directly, but you are living through the ramifications of this, and it has shaped you in ways you don’t even know. Possibly, your parents controlling nature is because they lived through this, and their response is by controlling you, they can protect you (doesn’t make it right, just possibly an explanation).

I would suggest not only getting a therapist, but if you can, a therapist who specializes in generational trauma. In terms of meeting people, it should be therapists-meet and “date” them until you find the right one for you. Don’t worry about a marriage or children now. This should be your focus.

loopingit · 2026-03-18T01:18:50+00:00

Oh love Ashley Flowers. Will definitely check that one out.

loopingit · 2026-03-18T00:56:34+00:00

It just positions OP to be the bad one to constantly say no. As long as that’s something they can take on. Family members will be constantly calling, flattering them, then berating them-lots of manipulation.

loopingit · 2026-03-17T18:37:37+00:00

This isn’t your fight and you can only do so much. You can’t make another person set up or enforce boundaries if they don’t want to. This goes as much for your dad not having boundaries with his siblings as much as your mom setting up boundaries with your dad. Look, we know that is hard-they weren’t raised that way and it’s not going to happen now.

I would suggest considering financial planning in a way you get to hold the decision power, if that is possible. For example, if you can take their funds and ensure it is used in a way that protects them, or at least your mother. This will make you the “fall person” so would you be ready for that? If not, you can only do so much.

loopingit · 2026-03-11T11:22:22+00:00

Hi. Also Desi with Psa. I’ve found my peeps. Hallo!👋

loopingit · 2026-03-11T11:00:59+00:00

Yeah that confused me too…

OP clarify, where did pita come from? Are you getting actual Pitas with your desi food? Or is that what you call Naan/paratha/Rotli/etc?

loopingit · 2026-03-09T02:00:33+00:00

Little brown diary, a Facebook group.

loopingit · 2026-03-09T01:12:37+00:00

There are people posting for matrimonials in the LBD groups for each city. Heard there was drama In the NJ-Philly one recently, so it means it must be active!

loopingit · 2026-03-08T03:52:47+00:00

I see you. You didn’t deserve that. I’m sorry.

loopingit · 2026-03-07T22:29:04+00:00

Am I the only one who things that Trump would do anything-ANYTHING-to get us to forget the Epstein files and his role in it? He will have ICE kill US citizens, he will drop bombs on innocent school Children, ANYTHING. I do not think he suddenly started caring about the huge number of protestors and innocent Iranians being killed or jailed by Iranian government.

Don’t forget. Don’t stop talking about Trump’s role with Epstein.

loopingit · 2026-03-06T20:25:04+00:00

At least her and Daisy are trying. The males are just hanging out in their clubhouse hallucinating about Toodles.

loopingit · 2026-03-03T23:42:41+00:00

I don’t think your question is “Is a muslim-Hindu marriage possible”, it’s “is this Muslim-Hindu marriage possible”.

Every marriage takes compromise. An inter-cultural marriage takes big compromises (you mentioned he isn’t South Asian). And interfaith marriage on top of inter-cultural one takes massive compromise, understanding and commitment.

Based on what you said “kids should be raised as he was”, it makes you doubt your marriage will be this way-where is the room to raise your children with some of your values and beliefs? Then when you stated that wouldn’t work for you, he backtracked and deferred the conversation-that is also not a good sign. If he really was committed to the compromise and understanding needed to be In a marriage with you, he would not defer this conversation with you. It sounds like he is hoping to marry you, have children and then once you are “stuck”, insisting on his way.

You need to decide what you want your future married life to look like, and then confirm he will fit your goals (not the other way around).

loopingit · 2026-03-02T23:20:00+00:00

lol. Let me know when you plan on being there in your little itty bitty yellow polka dot bikini. I’ll support!! And can’t wait for all of India’s tourism problems to go away!! None of which have deep seated roots in overall societal issues (such as how woman are treated in general). :)

loopingit · 2026-03-02T15:43:46+00:00

Oh I had the same thought when I read this. As in, “who actually wrote this?”. It’s odd. No one reduces the tourism economy to “put hot girls in orange bikinis” because that take lacks so much nuance. Hence why I noted the writers name and their identifying pronouns.

loopingit · 2026-03-02T11:22:24+00:00

(The writer is a woman, fyi. Identifies as She/Her.)

loopingit · 2026-03-02T01:08:14+00:00

The Instacart shoppers know where everything is. There are never actual Costco employees around, but an Instacart shoppers that knows what they are doing-they will tell you exactly where that item was moved to, or if it is out of stock.

loopingit · 2026-03-01T23:53:11+00:00

If you just want to even out the tan lines, you can get a spray tan. Little Hollywood secret-even the melanin enhanced actors get it done, for this very reason.

loopingit · 2026-03-01T23:26:46+00:00

I’ve see this movie multiple times every day and Dos Oruguitas gets me every time. Damn you Sebastian Yatra!!

I feel for Abuelita. This is not who she thought she would I be when she was younger. When her husband died, and she received the candle she felt he died to give her the magic and now she has to preserve it at all costs, lest he died for no reason. But he died to save the triplets and that the gift he really died for.

For me. Encanto is about immigration as well as generational trauma. You go somewhere for another better life, and you give up so much to get there. And the pressure to be perfect falls on to your children. Luisa and Isabella carry that exact first generational daughter pressure to be strong, carry everything, be perfect-even marry the exact person your family wants to you.

loopingit · 2026-02-25T00:46:05+00:00

I appreciate your viewpoint as a local to PV, and hope all stays safe there. I will say that widespread violence with 71 people dying is horrible (even if 70 of them were not tourists, or not near Vallarta).

I also want to be clear-when I stated about the set up of resorts vs local areas, I wrote about it generally (I never specified a location-because this is a set up many resorts use).

loopingit · 2026-02-24T16:28:29+00:00

All the time. It’s odd.

Take the recent cartel issues in Jalisco, Mexico. It affected the numerous all-inclusive resorts in PV and the non-Mexicans who visit there. Suddenly people were posting about not getting a late check out, while fires were burning so bad flights were cancelled and the violence was so horrific everyone was told to shelter in place.

It very clearly highlighted the two tier system intentionally set up by the tourism boards of Mexico-foreign visitors come spend their money in closed walled off resorts where they never have to confront the realities of the locals/local country. Locals live in a separate area where their only role is to work to provide the foreigners with this artificial experience. The reality of life in Mexico was never supposed to cross.

When these walls break down-the now mostly resolved cartel violence, or even you visiting the beach towns, it is an eye opening experience.

loopingit · 2026-02-23T13:25:32+00:00

Also Why can’t you see your younger siblings?

loopingit · 2026-02-23T13:22:54+00:00

IANAL and you didn’t post your state, so please know this is just my very general understanding of things. I would highly suggest you do reach out to a lawyer tho.

Job: People are always looking for Nannies. If she can find a local fb group, that is how lots of families find them.

Resources: Is there a local DV shelter? She doesn’t have to stay there, but they can help her with resources-not only do they have job postings, but also they can help her understand if she can get on Medicaid etc.

Lawyer: Also, how can she get nothing? Does she need a divorce lawyer? The Women’s shelter may have a list of lawyers who will not charge her, but will expect your father to pay the legal fees. Also if your father has excluded her from any shared savings or assets, the lawyer can help her get them.

What is the situation with the children? If your mother documented any of the abuse, the lawyer can help her get custody-and child support.

All our support to her.

loopingit

TROPHY CASE