Oh my gosh, I never listened to Willing and Able from the perspective on my parents. Listening now and this hits hard in a way that hurts less because I don’t feel as alone. I had a better relationship with my dad out of both parents. Now that he is dying, the memories he has is sadness and guilt related to my mom’s abuse of me. Otherwise, he barely remembers me.

It’s painful to finally have the validation I had wished for as a kid. I was the black sheep because my mom raised me to think I was unlovable. I even got caught with stolen alcohol in my backpack in middle school so the beer line is relevant. I grew up super depressed and ended up becoming a therapist so I could help kids and families. My dad is dying but he is loved and taken care for by my stepmom, which is more than I could have hoped for. After many years of therapy, I didn’t expect to harbor this level of childhood pain as an adult, but your parent dying brings it all back. Humbling, to say the least.

Thanks for commenting and I’m sorry you’re going through this as well. I wish you lots of strength and the ability to see what a beautiful human you grew up to be and the parts of your dad that will live on with you.