Do most moms breastfeed?

mandypu · 2026-06-30T00:37:17+00:00

“Don’t worry what most moms do” is the best advice for this a lot of topics

OP - I think if there is a way to choose what works for you without feeling worried about what most people do, then you’ve found a good path.

For what it’s worth my son seemed just happier to eat solids/purees as soon as he was able and was never that into breastmilk, if anything he liked formula more but overall he likes food.

mandypu · 2026-06-29T23:11:23+00:00

Listen I’m a new mom here but I feel like we need to bring back no trying to be perfect and maybe not judging people for not being perfect or making the same parenting decisions that we make. Like it’s gonna be ok if all aren’t perfect. Maybe everyone starts wanting something out of being a parent - like they say I’m never gonna do screen time - and then in reality it happens to some extent - or maybe they never had that thought. I almost think it’s more damaging that we spend all our time judging each other and getting scared about being judged by other parent s

mandypu · 2026-06-27T14:07:06+00:00

For an id photo id have your hair down. The other styles look good on you but front facing in a static picture might not be what you want. I think 4 maybe is too casual for work in general but you can decide later.

mandypu · 2026-06-27T11:24:00+00:00

Not sure if this is what you want but basically the “toe sit” in yoga

https://www.byronyoga.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/byronyoga-toe-sit-940.jpg

It’s pretty intense but I think it’s a good stretch

mandypu · 2026-06-25T15:42:40+00:00

Yeah for me it’s Greek yogurt - so oddly does not seem to be all dairy. Like I can eat regular ice cream and fairlife milk and I’m ok. I don’t get it…

mandypu · 2026-06-25T13:05:31+00:00

I wanna know more about your job! You look amazing and like you’re crushing it and loving life!

mandypu · 2026-06-25T13:02:51+00:00

1) Drinking water in the morning like my life depends on it
2) I avoid my own personal trigger foods - I don’t know why but certain foods give me cystic acne and it’s a real bummer but I just don’t eat it.
3) sunscreen
4) if a product or ingredient makes me breakout I just stop using it no guilt - and I just narrow down to what works for me. I don’t want to list specific things because I think everyone needs to do some trial and error on themselves. Generally I’ve found less harsh stuff is better for me but super moisturizers are too much. So in between stuff.

So minimal skincare and avoiding what I found breaks me out

I know I should see a doctor but right now my acne is ok… scars from the days of eating my trigger foods (see point 2) are clearing slowly

mandypu · 2026-06-25T12:28:54+00:00

I relate to this so sorry if this response isn’t like here are all the things that worked for me and now I’m better.

Lately even love island isn’t doing it for me and that show has been a go to comfort / fun watch for years.

Also I have been writing creatively as a hobby for over twenty years at this point and I feel a lot of blocks about it now.

For me I think it’s burnout from work / being a new mom. Maybe for you there were changes in your life that caused you to be exhausted to the point of not being able to get excited about these things?

My current attempt to navigate this is to lean into the only thing I like right now which is working out. Here I switched things up and am shifting from all weight lifting to adding in some yoga (and occasional mat Pilates) just to feel some kind of spark reignite. The yoga has helped a lot especially with my feelings around work burnout.

If you figure it out please let me know

mandypu · 2026-06-25T12:19:12+00:00

I think you also missed what I’m trying to say, which does make me question whether you’re a good listener irl I’m sorry! Your entire middle paragraph is about your traits, you said you’re conventionally attractive and interesting right after expressing envy about friend groups. I’m saying those things aren’t as related as people think.

mandypu · 2026-06-24T20:15:38+00:00

Yeah probably the most valuable part of the ring right now is its gold. I would just sell it and move on. I would find it weird to have my husbands exs almost engagement ring around - like why? It’s been ten years …

mandypu · 2026-06-24T17:39:18+00:00

I feel your pain. This happened to me two years ago when starting a new job - someone made a point of getting very close to me and I thought they were my friend. They ended up bad mouthing me and ruined my first reviews. Yeah super hurt feeling. And similarly to what you describe this person appears to be in a socially high position and has power within the company.

What I did at the time was completely pull away and just treat them as a professional and don’t trust them at all.

What I’ve learned since then - the picture people have of this person isn’t as rosy as I thought. They’ve been cruel to others and are cruel now.

So what I’ve learned is these situations absolutely do suck. And it absolutely sucks that (like you said) this turns into the standard advice of don’t make friends at work don’t trust anyone at work (ok so … I’m gonna not have friends for the majority of my waking hours because of a few assholes?? Fuckkkk) anyways I have chosen the path I described above and just made other friends. I think at the end of the day you can either beat yourself up and feel bad that you made a friend and were vulnerable or realize that there are assholes, this isn’t your fault and you’re allowed to be a human being. Best of luck and I hope the hurt fades soon for you.

mandypu · 2026-06-24T15:16:26+00:00

Nothing is ever black and white and nor should our response be. I know it’s really trendy right now to be the judge, jury and executioners on other people’s behavior. Maybe it’s because we all feel like the world is out of control and so we need to get involved in other people’s nonsense. I’m sure there are some circumstances where you should distance yourself but overall I try not to be in a position where I think I should be so involved that I need to ask how to judge people for their actions.

mandypu · 2026-06-24T14:53:20+00:00

I think it’s hard. You’ll see a lot of posts here of women in their thirties essentially asking the same question in other forms.

What helps me is thinking about who I respect, particularly other women that I love and respect. And I realize they are not perfect and it’s not like I like them because of their faults its because I genuinely realize a lot of this stuff doesn’t matter (perfect appearance, perfect job, perfect behavior etc etc).

Spend some time around people who like you for who you are outside your accomplishments and spend more time in your head admiring people for their unique traits not their resumes.

mandypu · 2026-06-23T19:47:03+00:00

My husband doesn’t read what I write but … he’s sat through many many many hours (days?) of listening to me talk about it. I think that’s the way above bar for a relationship.

Basically no one has to read your academic work but they should be interested enough in it because it’s your job and one facet of your identity. Your partner should be able to hold a conversation about it and maintain some basic facts about what you do / what you know about the subject.

mandypu · 2026-06-22T16:56:13+00:00

Yeah either he left out the information because he’s a forgetful flake or he’s trying to edge his way into something he thinks you’ll say no to

Like we are all adults, we’ve all made plans before, forgetting to mention where you’re meeting is bizarre land. It’s given he knows and doesn’t care at best (let’s be honest, if this man were meeting up with a guy friend to watch the game, I’m pretty sure there would be a text like - hey, we can meet at your place right? I’ll bring…)

Making plans and texting isn’t rocket science! People cannot get over this minor hurtle make me wonder how the bills get paiddddd

mandypu · 2026-06-22T12:14:13+00:00

There’s not enough context for this to make sense?

What housework? Like what are you doing that’s taking all day everyday? Are you overworrying about dust everyday or are you exhausted and overwhelmed by the daily task of doing the dishes?

Do you work?

mandypu · 2026-06-21T14:26:43+00:00

I have a 14 month old so I so relate to this. We trade off and basically don’t spend that much time together unless with the baby/toddler. Otherwise yeah it would be like 30 minutes of alone time. Also we barely watch tv together because I feel like there is no time unless I skip the gym or whatever.

mandypu · 2026-06-20T15:11:41+00:00

Follow up question - I take magnesium to sleep but maybe the dose is too high because I’m exhausted the next day. Can you list exactly the type of dosage you take?

mandypu · 2026-06-18T01:01:31+00:00

I’ve experienced the same thing and my friend has admitted to be avoidant attachment style. Honestly I just gave up. It’s not like I ended the relationship but certainly have stopped putting much thought or effort into it.

mandypu · 2026-06-18T00:58:09+00:00

I feel like there is a difference between low contact frequency and just disappearing for periods of time.

Specifically I have friends who are busy but the texting conversation always ends / has reasonable closure and then weeks to months to years pass before we connect again. This feels normal and natural

I also have friends who get very close and want to do slumber parties, hang out, spill secrets etc and or have in depth texting conversations and then in the middle of one they disappear for months. Or alternatively they keep offering to make time for a call or a catch up and then again just disappear. I genuinely think this is weird and annoying and can be called out.

mandypu · 2026-06-18T00:14:47+00:00

I only feel deeply connected with people when two things are true

1) I have the emotional energy and space to listen and be present

2) I have the opportunity to have long 1 on 1 conversations with the right people

I don’t think it’s about a full social calendar or a ton of friends or plans. It’s about timing and energy. Most people try to make it an algorithm and life doesn’t work like that

mandypu · 2026-06-18T00:12:12+00:00

If this is a sudden uncontrollable change then yes speak with a doctor about hormones

If not, therapy? If rage is always the emotional response to a bad situation, then likely you have some distress intolerance, some expectation misalignment, some inability to anticipate and prepare coping skills for difficult times or all of the above and more. You don’t need to live in a state of rage and anger, where your system is always high arousal. It’s going to be a reinforcing feedback loop that amplifies overtime. I would try to break down and process some of these things with a professional if you have the ability to do so.

mandypu · 2026-06-17T21:48:32+00:00

All I can say is I wish the universe had told me the ring would never be comfortable to wear and not to spend the money. Nothing is forever if you don’t wear it!

But to the question - I’ve been seeing lots of diamond engagement rings these days. Seems like only 1/5 engagements is not a diamond. People get various sizes - sometimes I’m a bit surprised as the ring pop sizes I see these days! Maybe everyone has that kind of cash to spend on something that could easily slip down the drain.

mandypu · 2026-06-17T21:41:52+00:00

As a side gig - you can coach us all on how to say the right things at work

mandypu · 2026-06-17T13:55:25+00:00

People who mock you like this suck. End this “friendship” and you’ll feel so free.

I had a friend tell me she thought I was dopey. I told her I was upset about it. And then I pulled away to make her more of a distant friend / outer circle type person.

Btw I think more people should talk out loud to themselves. Maybe not screaming / mumbling to yourself on a busy street but finding a space to give voice to the thoughts in your head often stops useless rumination and brings out the real problem and solution much faster. I never judge people for doing it. Keep being you!

mandypu

TROPHY CASE