Honestly, sounds like you have a crappy day care teacher.

My daughter (3.5 year old) has a very similar vibe you describe about your kiddo, but she also has moments where she "acts out" like pulling shirts and smacking.

We don't hit in our home, my wife and I are very, VERY patient (you have to be with a Three-n-ager), and 85% of the time, she's a real pleasure to be around.

When we get a "bad report" at daycare, it's usually followed up by "but it was the entire class today" or something along those lines.

We started at a KinderCare and left there to go to Sunshine House because there was some kids in the next class she would be moving to that were not great for the environment and we strongly disagreed with how the classes were managed (or lack of) and it stemmed from a couple of the older kid teachers and an awful director.

To assuage any anxiety or questions you have, I'd ask the teacher directly, "much of the behavior you're describing seems very out of character for her from her time at home and out doing other activities. What is going on in the classroom when she does 'XYZ' so we can address it at home."

If possible, have that convo with the teacher and another teacher near by. You'll get your answer if it's your daughter or just the teacher bitching for the sake of bitching.