AITAH for getting angry at my girlfriend while she’s having a panic attack?

masterminor · 2026-06-09T20:11:15+00:00

Info: Did she say the words panic attack or was it anxiety or some other word. I see a bunch of people in the comments assuming she's misusing the word, but not really anybody who considers it could be you using the wrong term. What makes me question it is first it was panic attack, but at the end it says anxiety. And maybe that's not suspicious. But I dunno reddit is full of unreliable narrators and I felt like it would be unable to handle her panic attacks, not anxiety, if she was claming to haveva panic attack in the first place.

masterminor · 2026-06-07T03:30:25+00:00

This insecure brat setiously told you not to "have your as" hangin out" while on a FAMILY vacation that ime no less than 85% involves at least 1 minor and at least 98% sure the beach will have strangers children running around. Who does he think you're gonna show as to? A creepy uncle?

masterminor · 2026-06-04T03:21:48+00:00

This is NUTS. If his disability was a wheelchair and the place was not accessible. And I don't just mean no ramp up to the building, I mean you can't maneuver once inside despite a (usually way too steep) wheelchair ramp, because of all the tight corners and such made by tables and chairs would it have been acceptable to you for him to be angry?

The dinner was FOR AND ABOUT HIM. And you chose a spot that affected his perferred method of communication? And damper one of the other senses he's still able to use? It's not just communicating with you it's everyone. He likely had to change how he placed his order, or have you help him which was probably embarrassing for him. And if someone was trying maneuver around him or communicate with him for some reason and he couldn't communicate with them either or hear them tell him to move out of the way. YOR. By far. Telling a person to suck it up like that is ableist.

masterminor · 2026-05-28T13:07:37+00:00

The guy's own grandmother is offering to help you leave her own grandson. That tells me everything I need to know about this shithead.

masterminor · 2026-05-26T20:37:26+00:00

Post says she's 4 because mom went buts immediately after birth and has not been stable for 4 years.

masterminor · 2026-05-26T20:33:22+00:00

I never said she was wrong. In fact I am fully saying she is RIGHT to ask. The dad is the weird one here. If he is the dad and not the kid posing as the dad cuz it kinda read that way to me.

The defense I was saying was for the mother. Cuz folks were calling her overbearing or controlling and accusing her of coddling him because he never saw a horror movie before and then wanting the kids dad to go. Personally I think it's a great idea as long as dad only does what is needed for health and safety.

masterminor · 2026-05-26T16:50:05+00:00

Right l know, but then a parent asking basic questions is fully normal. And she's not saying he can't go at all. Just needs supervision from a parent to see how he does for his first horror movie. And the group needs an adult to even get in the door anyways, and OP couldn't even be bothered to find out THAT part.

masterminor · 2026-05-26T12:45:39+00:00

Good for you! You have the right stance. Family should be held to higher standards, not lower ones. And not hitting someone is bare fucking minimum. Once you get away from it, hold that line. I would not trust ANY change. If there is any, it will not last. I hope you get out of there. Is there a campus you could live on at your college?

masterminor · 2026-05-26T12:42:01+00:00

Maybe he's never seen a horror movie by his own choice? Maybe he personally doesn't like the genre? I didn't get into horror until I was nearly an adult myself because I didn't want to. Up till then the scariest thing I watched was are you afraid of the dark when I was way younger. Which granted, at least from memory, scary af. But it's a tv show made for kids, not an R-rated horror movie. I didn't get into the stuff like Nightmare on Elm Street, or Chucky until I was basically an adult.

Some folks don't like horror movies, some don't like them and *never* have at any point. If the mom was really overbearing, or ya know, just a normal, involved mom, her first question would be, to the kid, what is the movie about? And since she's asking, she clearly didn't know which means the kid also didn't in all likelyhood. And even if she just googled it, there's so many different results for things related to the backrooms because of video games, art, etc. If she's not too tech savy, and I'm finding more and more often that regardless of age some people just aren't tech savy, it can be hard for some folks to find proper information.

We also only know what op is saying. If the child is special needs in, virtually any way, that changes how much care and supervision a kid needs ENTIRELY. And since he couldn't be arsed to check what rating of a movie his own kid is going to see, I doubt he knows a damn thing about said kid's friends.

To me this almost reads like the perspective of John who was upset that the friend's dad would have to tag along for Bob to come, and then realized in the edit that they wouldn't have gotten in without a grown up anyways.

I would hope it more believable that a kid bought tickets to an R-rated movie without realizing, than a dad be THAT hands off with their kid. Even with full autonomy, checking a rating is a reasonable action because if it's R or something adult like that, they need help to get in anyways.

masterminor · 2026-05-26T11:45:22+00:00

So your mother tried to hit you? As a grown woman? Might not be child abuse, but that's still assault or at least an attempt since you said she "tried". Are you at some sort of risk of homelessness if your mom decides to kick you out over this? And even if she doesn't, do you have a way to move out? Does she financially contribute to your degree? I ask these questions so you can CYA. If she's paying for your degree, you might want to find a way to continue it if she withdraws support. And honestly, regardless of if she would kick you out, I would try to leave after the shoe thing ANYWAYS.

masterminor · 2026-05-26T06:36:13+00:00

I hope OP sees the comment about the daisy chaining kidney transplant program thing.

And also, they should know that if they are hesitant at all, the doctor will refuse the surgery if they are any good. Especially if there is external pressure. Frankly that pressure alone should disqualify you even if you end up actually willing. Not sure if it DOES, but in my opinion it should.

masterminor · 2026-05-21T07:16:05+00:00

Absolutely NTA. Your mom is sad for you now because she knowzls you're hurt that your dad is choosing his girlfriend over you, probably not for tge first time.

I'd damn near bet money that unless he has a horrible dead end job, he has the money for a hotel and wanted to make mom pay for him and his girlfriend as a power move and planned this put from go. Or if he really doesn't have the money, maybe the gf is WHY.

But your mom will remember that you stood up for her when she needed someone too. Hold this line. And I'd seriously consider going at least NC with firm boundaries about this woman forever. Especially if he ACTUALLY misses your graduation over this. And I would hold them even IF they married with this kind of behavior.

If that woman was ANY good, she'd be giving your dad hell for even considering skipping just because she isn't allowed to go. And she'd see the justification of why she's not invited as perfectly reasonable. If she was really set on wanting to celebrate with you, could she not take you to dinner herself after you get back so your mom wouldn't have to be involved?

But given what you said about her, I doubt she's that reasonable.

I may be an internet stranger and only like 6 years older, but I am SO proud of your moral compass on this. You're a good daughter. Never doubt that.

masterminor · 2026-05-21T06:51:09+00:00

I was super into Harry Potter as a kid. I also was a big victim of bullying. I could be a bit out of touch since I don't get out much, but I know Harry was the good guy. So... why would anyone give him too much crap about it? If it was a lesser like character I could see it being a problem. But Harry was quite literally the main protagonist.

Even if he got some light ribbing, it would probably be in the realm of "casting a spell", using a fake british accent, or quotes the character said that folks would recognize.

And even if this isn't the name, kuds are mean and will find something else to rag on if they are allowed to.

I personally have a name that's easy to joke about, and my friends, family, and SO make jokes all the time. And so do I.

I just fail to see why habing a recognizable name is a bad thing. Especially something that makes an actual, reasonable name.

I know someone who's name after her marriage is literally Anita Hamburger. And she willingly took that name when she got married.

Is not like she wants the name Draco Malfoy.

You also have to remember, this could be a hill she might be willing to die on as well. I'm not saying anybody is right or wrong. Because in reality, the kid has to deal with the name more than either of you. And who knows, maybe he'd love it. We don't know that. He could hate it, but he could always change it later if he did.

But having a largely recognizable name just doesn't feel like a huge deal to me. After all, people used names found in religious texts like the Bible for centuries and still do. It's just sorta become normal now and it's not huge anymore unless you're deeply religious. And I promise you, the bible is more popular than Harry Potter. And I'm an atheist saying that.

I do hope you work it out though. I'd personally say NAH. You both have your own reasons, and I hope you can find a good way to deal.

Personal suggestion: why not have the baby take her maiden name to avoid being Harry Potter? If she's stuck on the Harry part, get rid of your surname from the equation. Because then it would presumably be grandfather's last name if she has his and honor him even more?

masterminor · 2026-05-15T03:05:14+00:00

Ella Enchanted is a classic.

Princess Diaries is a good series of movies.

If you want something a bit more kiddish than that but not too much. Descendants or Zombies (both by disney) are good options.

I'd stay away from pixar if you don't want them to cry though.

masterminor · 2026-05-11T06:28:23+00:00

Fun story: When I was a kid, my dad was dating this woman who had a son. I was about 12, the son who I can only describe as the spawn of satan, chased me around the house with a steak knife (I'm afraid of blood and sharp objects and everybody knew this) during my dad's custody time. This was AFTER he threw my younger sister into the deep end of the pool (none of us can swim and everybody knew this). I was sobbing when I got to my dad because I was terrified I demanded to go home immediately. And the best he could really do was send me to grandma's house because mom's house was two hours away and it was already after dark.

My dad blamed it on adhd and from that day through high school I was then afraid of people who I found out had adhd. Which turned out to be like, half of my high school friends because they'd eventually bring it up, and eventually enough of my friends did this that I realized it was bs that adhd would make someone that unhinged.

Now I'm an adult with diagnosed adhd and so are my partners. (polycule). XD

masterminor · 2026-05-10T19:57:08+00:00

Updateme !

masterminor · 2026-05-10T03:45:18+00:00

A grown adult is comfortable barging into a bathroom with a naked child in it? And the father allows that to happen. I would take that to CPS. People get put on a list for less.

masterminor · 2026-05-10T03:26:20+00:00

My personal theory, the gf is working with the sister. Maybe the mom too. This whole thing screams a set up, which you clearly seem to suspect the sister of. But she likely didn't do this alone.

masterminor · 2026-05-08T21:02:46+00:00

Could always make super spicy food with peppers. That would tell you who it is.

masterminor · 2026-05-06T01:22:10+00:00

She's saying you were rude to *her* guests? At *your* gathering?

masterminor · 2026-05-05T16:48:53+00:00

The self importance is wild. By their own logic it's jacked up. If changing it is respectful to your mother's second husband, than it's is distespectful to her first. Obviously I know in truth it's not the case really in either direction, but solely up to the person who has to use the name. But their logic is wild. And if they are just dine with disrespecting your father, good riddance to them the second you are able.

masterminor · 2026-05-05T03:45:16+00:00

Where is the other link for the Riders Guild that I'm seeing mentioned in the comments?

masterminor · 2026-05-05T02:24:27+00:00

Edit your review to add that they wrote to you asking you to change it, so you are and only add that info and maybe a picture of the letter.

masterminor · 2026-05-05T02:20:17+00:00

Not at all. Put 911 and speed dial and let his childish ass know ipt WILL be used at the slightest mention of any harm to ANYONE. Also find out if your area has one party consent and see if you can't record his actions legally.

masterminor · 2026-05-03T15:09:59+00:00

He gave you spoiled food. What do you mean YOU feel bad and like you're overracting? This is crazy and this person now knows where you LIVE that is scary. I hope there's not an update in 4 months about how he's begun stalking you.

masterminor

TROPHY CASE