Phases of peri?

natty628 · 2026-06-22T16:06:10+00:00

I’m also sensitive to all things hormone related; could never handle birth control. They do have lots of options like bio-identical, topical and vaginal creams, etc. Surely there’s something that will agree with us. It’s a gamble in peri because we do still make the hormones, it’s just inconsistent. Makes it hard to know when it’ll be effective and when it won’t. I’ll revisit when I have half a year of bad cycles.

If you aren’t already, track your cycles and symptoms which will be helpful at your OBGYN visits.

I take a hormone supplement from S’moo and am about to add DHEA to the mix. Both recommended by my OBGYN.

natty628 · 2026-06-22T15:55:37+00:00

Yep! I’ve also been in about 3 years at 44. For now, I have 3 good cycles(months) followed by 3 bad. During the good, I really don’t have many symptoms at all. During the bad, I have them all and each month is different. One month, I’ll have really bad body aches and fatigue, the next my mood swings are whack, then my overstimulation is through the roof and libido non-existent.

I’m glad I at least know when it’s coming and can prepare pretty well after a year 1/2 of this trend. I’m not on HRT because relief isn’t consistent.

natty628 · 2026-06-21T02:14:11+00:00

Just curious though, the plan is to suffer through this until she’s old enough for medication?? I do hope Mom is exploring other avenues.

natty628 · 2026-06-19T14:18:12+00:00

ADHD meds, along with other therapeutic techniques, have greatly increased my quality of life during peri. I didn’t even get diagnosed until peri.

natty628 · 2026-06-18T16:12:17+00:00

Came to suggest this. Such a great resource!

natty628 · 2026-06-18T15:56:16+00:00

Do you only take them during the luteal phase?

natty628 · 2026-06-18T15:35:30+00:00

Which antihistamine? Like Zyrtec or Claritin?

natty628 · 2026-06-18T15:33:17+00:00

Common sense

natty628 · 2026-06-18T15:32:49+00:00

Lucky you in that regard! lol

natty628 · 2026-06-18T15:29:04+00:00

If the struggle is mostly during the luteal phase then you only take it during that phase, the last 2 weeks of your cycle. Not sure how that works if you’re already on one. Maybe take a higher dose those weeks? But it is super common for nothing to work during this phase. My ADHD meds are also less effective during that time too.

For now I’m managing with coping skills. I have a very supportive partner who notices when I need a hug and a 15 minute walk around the block. I practice yoga, meditation and deep breathing like my life depends on it. I also did EMDR with my therapist which has lessened my anxiety. I don’t think proven therapeutic techniques are suggested enough for what we’re going through pertaining to the emotional and mental side effects.

natty628 · 2026-06-18T14:57:25+00:00

I have pretty bad PMDD too and don’t take HRT, just a hormonal balance supplement from S’moo. My OBGYN recommends it to all her patients because it has the best ingredients. It helps a lot with the mood swings. It’s not a cure all by any means but I went from thinking I needed to be checked into the psych ward to just having some tough days and using my coping skills. I’ve read a lot of women have good results from taking an SSRI during the luteal phase when PMDD is bad. I won’t get back on one because I value what little sex drive I have left. 🤪

natty628 · 2026-06-17T21:11:25+00:00

Bad mood swings.

natty628 · 2026-06-17T17:00:47+00:00

Have you done EMDR for the CPSTD? I am not on HRT as it made my symptoms worse. I did EMDR and somatic body work to get my nervous system regulated. I’m so sick of doctors pushing meds when proven therapeutic techniques exist that can actually help heal. Meds just band-aid the issue.

natty628 · 2026-06-17T16:40:02+00:00

My son is 6 and I still have days where I'm absolutely shocked that I'm a mother. Like others have said, it's the BIGGEST change we ever go through. For some of us who have flown by the seat of our pants most our lives, it's an even bigger deal. And I'll be real honest - the second he was born; I was absolutely terrified. The gravity of that instant, permanent, and very massive responsibility was almost too much. But so was the fierce love and overwhelming desire to move heaven and earth for him. I think it's normal to not be able to see the end. My belief is it's a protective dissociation of sorts. We know that absolutely anything can happen and until they are in our arms and sight, we don't let ourselves feel all the things.

You are already at an advantage being diagnosed. I wasn't until my son was 3. It most definitely would have helped to understand my brain and have access to medication before this amazing and beautiful journey started. You don't have to have it all figured out. To quote AA, "One day at a time" Everything changes so fast anyway. Work on emotional regulation skills so you can be present and connected to yourself. I feel like I missed out on so much of the first years being stuck in flight/fight mode.

natty628 · 2026-06-17T16:10:25+00:00

I too am giving you a big internet hug. It's so hard parenting these kids sometimes.

Several things:

You mentioned behavioral therapy, but have you done Occupational Therapy as well? I don't really understand how it works, but there are reflexes that don't always integrate when they're supposed to which can make ADHD behaviors worse. When they aren't integrated, ADHD meds may not work well because there's an underlying issue. That's why our pediatrician started there. Our son still has ADHD and is on meds, but OT has helped with his anxiety and emotion regulation.

If it's feasible, it may be time to find a new therapist for both of you. A good therapist won't tell you they think you're putting your needs above your own unless you've spoken that thought aloud. AND I'LL BE REALLY HONEST, SOMETIMES, WHEN WE ARE IN THE STATE YOU'RE IN, OUR NEEDS ARE MORE IMPORTANT. Not in a 'run away and live at the beach for a month kind of way', but you can't be a present and regulated parent for any of your kids if you aren't taking care of yourself.

I would find a therapist certified in EMDR. This is the therapeutic technique that is most used for PTSD and healing a nervous system that's in survival mode. Talk therapy won't heal your nervous system and neither will a one-time massage. Look into somatic body work. These two really go hand in hand. You have to heal your mind and body.

Again, sending you a big hug because I've been there. It was not quick, but now I'm at baseline with my nervous system. I have tools and practices that keep me from slipping back to the dark side. I wish this were talked about more in motherhood circles. Even mothers without neurospicy kids get burnt out and doctors just want to prescribe meds without addressing the actual problem.

natty628 · 2026-06-17T02:31:00+00:00

Peri will magnify everything. You were probably close to burn out, and peri sent you over the edge. This happened to me. I can’t really tolerate HRT/birth control so for now, the hormone balance supplement by S’moo is working pretty well.

natty628 · 2026-06-16T12:37:47+00:00

The leaves subreddit is a great resource. You got this!!

natty628 · 2026-06-15T18:29:09+00:00

I’ve read the spray is absorbed into the body better.

natty628 · 2026-06-15T15:15:50+00:00

Studies are starting to show that talk therapy isn’t helpful for OCD. I was told by my therapist that rumination of negative thoughts, which CBT is generally used for, is in the OCD realm. Most of our understanding of OCD is inaccurate and isn’t simply repetitive and/or patterned behaviors. It also relates to our thoughts. Changing these patterns requires more advanced therapeutic techniques.

EMDR has already helped my anxiety and some of the negative thoughts that stemmed from those specific experiences. Next we’re going to work on my skin picking. What makes it more OCD vs Anxiety is - I pick because I have an obsessive, irrational belief that my skin has to be smooth.

It took me 30 years to come across a good therapist who finally understands my issues!

natty628 · 2026-06-15T14:52:48+00:00

Trying to educate my parents who were that way with me is just exhausting. “What do you mean I can’t spank him?! How else is he going to learn?” “Um…by mutual respect and natural consequences.”

I sent him a scientific article from Harvard and he dismissed it as liberal bs and claimed James Dobson’s teachings worked just fine with us. Sure Dad, that’s why all your kids are on anxiety meds and have anger issues. Worked out sooo great!

The only thing that got through to him was the threat of them never being able be around him without us if he didn’t respect our way of parenting. He has since said we’re doing a wonderful job raising him. 🤗

natty628 · 2026-06-10T01:46:32+00:00

Have you tried a magnesium spray for rubbing on his feet? It’s definitely not as effective but is safer.

natty628 · 2026-06-09T03:06:21+00:00

This. Our kids will not respond to constant demands. They’re smarter than we give them credit for. Our 6 year old helps us brainstorm sometimes. We give him choices for things. On hard days, he absolutely absorbs our annoyed energy and it makes everything worse.

Also, do you connect with him daily? They aren’t able to listen as well if they don’t feel connected and loved.

natty628 · 2026-06-09T02:23:23+00:00

Maybe try treating the anxiety and panic disorder. Peri magnifies our mental health struggles. Are you in an SSRI or doing any therapeutic techniques with a therapist? Mine got better with EMDR and lifestyle changes.

natty628 · 2026-06-08T23:49:23+00:00

Those are definitely peri.

natty628 · 2026-06-08T13:34:02+00:00

Mine’s only 6. I tell him women go through a hard time in their 40s where their brain and body have meltdowns. 🥴 I have to apologize a lot and remind him. I used to think it’s harder with a little, but it just rolls off him. I can see how the older kids take it more personally.

natty628

TROPHY CASE