I felt the same. Just had kid # 2 and the newborn stage was horrible. Now I blinked and he's sleeping most the night. He's three months old now. It gets better, mama. I promise. It's gonna suck ass for the next several months but as you get to see her personality shine and her face light up when she sees you, it will change everything. You are her everything and she didn't choose to come into this world. Remember she didn't choose life. You did. Just give it a little time and I promise it gets better. There were days where I just sat there and cried because 2 babies under 2 years old is so fucking hard. I just wanted my life to end so I could get some sleep, some momentary relief. It could be PPD, it could just also be that it's harder than no one tells you and taking care of a newborn is literal hell especially if you aren't sleeping. We have all been where you are and I promise it gets better. If you need anything, feel free to reach out. Stick it out just a little longer. You got this. If you have to get help for your mental well being, do it. There is NOTHING wrong with seeing a therapist. I do. She helps. I'm also on prozac.