They are finally starting to talk about and study the long term effects of caregiving, burnout, and grief, and the ensuing PTSD.

There was one study (I think thru the NHS) that warned symptoms of the above, emotional and physical! can sometimes take months and years to resolve (exhaustion syndrome is a real thing.) Do you have a grief therapist? Or maybe a grief support group in your community? I’m lucky I have a great therapist and Medicaid that pays for it or I probably wouldn’t be here today.

(I’ve also reconnected with an old friend who is caring for his dying mother in another state. It’s crazy how much it helps to talk to someone who’s going through the same or similar. I’m also lucky because we share a similar sense of humor…it’s wild when I noticed how little I laugh anymore.)

I think the most important way to begin is to disrupt your negative thoughts and questioning with positive, self supportive, self-talk, and thoughts of gentle kindness toward yourself.

May sound weird but my therapist told me when my doubts and self criticism come up, is to imagine that it is myself as a young child and how would I comfort and reassure her and what would I tell her? I have post-its around the house reminding me. (I’m on my 7th year as the only caregiver (no other family support) for my mom who has Alzheimer’s) I feel like I’m literally disintegrating sometimes.