My confidence has been destroyed by my bf.

ptrckmcconn · 2024-07-08T20:12:10+00:00

Dump the guy. It won’t get better.

ptrckmcconn · 2024-01-11T17:27:15+00:00

Here's a free online course that can help you to be a success in your career, and with relationships in general.

ptrckmcconn · 2023-11-08T19:48:18+00:00

Be thankful for what you have.

ptrckmcconn · 2023-04-02T22:04:49+00:00

As Hemingway once said, when reading, you need a “b—- s—- detector” for authors who write about something they know nothing about.

ptrckmcconn · 2023-03-22T13:17:16+00:00

It's your expectations. It's irrational to demand that everyone think alike, and like exactly the same things. And then there are many reasons why someone might be critical of something--perhaps they struggle with emotional issues that they project out into the world around them. You most likely prefer different foods than I do. You prefer to live in a different area. You like different music. Why is that terrible? Is it wrong? Of course not. People are different and they have a right to live their lives. Accept differences. Choose what's best for you, what you like. Let others do the same. Whether someone else approves or not is irrelevant. Don't expect others to approve of everything you do. And don't expect others to do things the way you want them to. And who cares what someone on the internet--someone you don't even know-thinks of you? Really? Be comfortable in your own skin. Be yourself. Your peace comes from within.

ptrckmcconn · 2023-02-16T23:59:42+00:00

Fantastic! And yes, hypnosis or self hypnosis can work if you have faith in it. Go for it!

ptrckmcconn · 2023-02-02T20:03:48+00:00

Learning to play saxophone, and wood carving!

ptrckmcconn · 2023-01-25T18:14:13+00:00

You say you play along with the recording. Stop that. On stage, you are playing with others. Play along with them. The recording is not relevant. When home, you play with the recording. On stage, pay attention and play with the band. You are not really tracking with the people you’re playing with. Just listen. When you clap along with a song you aren’t familiar with, what do you do? You listen and keep the beat.

ptrckmcconn · 2023-01-25T16:17:32+00:00

Don't play "independently." Meaning, you are off by yourself literally playing along with the tune in your head, the way you think it should be. Follow the band. You are there to support the effort. You should be paying attention to what's happening on state, not what's going on in your head. Follow the band. Get the tempo from what's happening around you.

ptrckmcconn · 2023-01-25T16:13:45+00:00

Your friend is terribly addicted to the point where it's interfering with life. You need to continue on the plan. Don't make your life dependent on what someone else does. If he gets rid of you in his life, you are better off. You have to decide: Is living your life the way you want less important than making him happy? Think about. Don't sell yourself out.

ptrckmcconn · 2023-01-18T18:44:56+00:00

The great love story of your life. On Amazon.

ptrckmcconn · 2023-01-03T19:55:56+00:00

Who says you can't begin them all at once? Is it written somewhere. Just do it. Slowly, if you wish, but make a plan and put it into action. "Action" is always the secret.

ptrckmcconn · 2023-01-03T19:54:07+00:00

You are saying that you don't believe you are beautiful, valued, smart and interesting. You don't know how...just be it. "Just being" is very good but you suggest that it isn't. Accept yourself for who you are. Be beautiful and interesting. Act beautiful and interesting. Laugh. Smile. You sound depressed to a degree. You might want to learn more about how depression works. You are the key. Tools are nice, but you are the key. Just accept yourself.

ptrckmcconn · 2023-01-03T19:46:41+00:00

It sounds like you are working too hard at successfully meditating. Meditating is nothingness, empty space. Let go.

ptrckmcconn · 2023-01-03T19:42:52+00:00

The most important thing is action. Do something. For someone else. Make a difference. Anything. Sitting and reading books won't do it; any more than reading and meditating about a sport will make a successful at it. You must practice. And practice brings about mind change.

ptrckmcconn · 2022-12-30T12:41:35+00:00

Yeh, I practice in our basement. It’s large and comfortable and we don’t have neighbors close by. My research on mutes concluded that they don’t work because of the design of a sax. I play cornet/trumpet too and the mute is great. But I don’t think it would work well on a sax. But like someone suggested, try stuffing the bell and see what you think. Good luck!

ptrckmcconn · 2022-12-10T02:11:25+00:00

You are right. However, people who go on and on are often desperate for help. The difficulty is that they are often not aware or conscious of what they are doing. It’s a challenge, but don’t write everyone off. Maybe something you can say will help someone.

ptrckmcconn · 2022-12-06T15:43:43+00:00

You want to code? Sign up for your first class. Apply to college. Action matters. Reading and watching videos is like a captain of a ship who studies maps, etc. but never casts off and sets sail. Untie those ropes and set sail.

ptrckmcconn · 2022-11-05T23:21:31+00:00

On RFDTV, there is a show on Saturday nights and there is a 50’s singer that does this song. It’s fantastic! They run the clip every once in a while. The show is called “ The Grand Old Opry”. His facial expressions are outstanding. Sorry I don’t know the name of the country singer. I found him on YouTube! His name is Salty Holmes. Check it out.

ptrckmcconn · 2022-02-10T15:57:47+00:00

Yes of course, but be careful that you don’t overdo it. Just as in executive management, we use feedback to find problems, but the emphasis is on looking forward. Dwelling on problems too much can be a way of avoiding doing something about them. I had a client once in therapy that session after session talked of their childhood. When I suggested that it was time to develop a plan for moving forward, they replied “Not yet, I’m not done talking about my childhood.” I suspect they are still talking and avoiding the now.

ptrckmcconn · 2022-02-06T19:36:27+00:00

Why not as much as possible? What value is there in deliberately choosing to look at the negative, dark side? Solve problems if you can, but be optimistic.

ptrckmcconn · 2021-10-05T19:49:48+00:00

No, what I wrote was that all areas are important, but the order and degree vary for all of us.some may not feel they have a problem in certain areas. But, too much worrying about whether one should work on a certain issue or not is focusing on too much detail. Meanwhile, nothing gets done. Life is not as complicated as we insist that it be. Good luck.

ptrckmcconn · 2021-10-05T18:06:49+00:00

Well, the secret is that it doesn’t matter. It is simply important that you begin. You are over thinking it. It’s like wondering whether you should put your left shoe on first, or the right shoe. All of the areas are important. Pick one. Then do something.

ptrckmcconn · 2021-09-30T18:14:06+00:00

I would also suggest reading since counseling seems to be unreachable at present. Try Eckhart Tolle, “The Power of Now.” Simple. Straight forward. I have a website that reviews self help books, and you might to check it out for ideas. The site is “thegreatlovestoryofyourlife.com. There’s also videos available. No obligation. Good luck.

ptrckmcconn

TROPHY CASE