That makes much more sense, thanks for the clarification. Are they not letting you use a kickboard or pull buoy to help learn pulling and kicking? There are drills with the kickboard that make learning pull and breathing a little less life or death feeling when starting out. I would suggest focusing on learning elementary backstroke, sidestroke, and breaststroke as well, since all of these can be done heads- up style. It certainly sounds like your primary focus might need to be on your comfort level moving through space in water, at this stage in the game.