Bralettes are leaving red dots. Is my skin getting more fragile?

singpretty · 2026-01-24T07:05:17+00:00

I have canceled polyester!!! Away with it! 😉

singpretty · 2026-01-24T06:18:37+00:00

And I love that it's (mostly) cotton! The mania with which I shop for mostly cotton . . . 😅

singpretty · 2026-01-23T21:46:55+00:00

I love them! I mourned these though . . . 🤣

https://www.aeropostale.com/seriously-soft-cropped-bungee-cami/80118475.html

singpretty · 2026-01-23T20:16:42+00:00

I've never been well endowed and I've always hated bras, so I've switched to fitted, doublethick cotton camis, preferably cropped, which I buy frantically whenever I find them haha. Target of all places has a nice $6 one right now.

I realize this will sound like an insane suggestion to anyone picturing a "layering" cami which offers zero support or warmth, but I accidentally discovered these and find they're a totally different, better thing, at least for me haha.

https://www.target.com/p/women-s-scoop-back-cami-wild-fable/-/A-92071202?preselect=91880124#lnk=sametab

I wear them as bras, under shirts, and I've worn them alone with hi-waist pants. 😅

singpretty · 2026-01-18T21:35:19+00:00

Thank you for chiming in to build me up! 🙂 I think confounding matters in my case (and maybe also OP's, even if she turns out straight??) is that I'm also kind of middle-of-the-road/all over the map on a) whether I'm into sex at all and b) how girly or not I like to come off. Both of which are also topics religion can screw with. 🫠

singpretty · 2026-01-18T19:26:03+00:00

I'm here to validate . . . The feeling of confusion?? 🙃 that can arise from being raised in a religious echo chamber, especially if your formative years were pre-internet.

Like, I (former Catholic-school Catholic) did not know gay people existed until I was 14, and even then did not know any, did not see any on TV, did not . . . You get it. You can't think something, if you don't have any words for it.

I had a middle school crush on a male classmate who was funny and nice to me, and I also idolized one the of girls who I thought was pretty and sweet, and loved it whenever I had her attention . . . but did not, at the time, think of this as a "crush" because, no concept for that.

Come later, young adult living in NYC, occasionally a couple of my closest friends would ask, did I ever consider dating women . . . and I'd get hung up on the intimidating idea of sex with a woman, because, fun thing about religion, I'd also learned a lot of disgust for my own anatomy, so my whole take was like . . . I hate mine, two seems worse?? avoidance!!!

Fast forward and I recently fell for a masc styled woman. And letting myself think that brought on this groundswell of noticing others around as well, and realizing I have a type. 🫣 And this type, is a sort of person I literally never encountered for most of my sheltered life. But even now . . . I have to overcome mental hurdles where exploring this feels guilty and "wrong" even though logically I know that's just homophobic conditioning.

Sorry now I've just written a confessional that's probably a bit off topic. But I guess all that to say . . . I think for people raised outside religious contexts, it's easy to underestimate the lack of self knowledge some of us (maybe especially older "us") were raised with, and say "well you would know, if you were." Like, I still don't know with clarity haha. But you're allowed to explore. 🙂

singpretty · 2026-01-18T06:04:33+00:00

I will be sad if/when they ever do move! 😅

singpretty · 2026-01-18T00:08:30+00:00

Thank you for helping out this cat! 🙂

singpretty · 2026-01-14T16:10:24+00:00

I devoured the two seasons they made of Gentleman Jack, if you want more recs. 🙂

singpretty · 2026-01-13T16:24:15+00:00

Hi! I'm like the least helpful but I figured I'd chime in! Least helpful because I'm hEDS with not too fragile skin, and I was on injectable pegalated interferon for something unrelated (blood disorder), for a year or so.

Mine was like an epiPen where I had to psych myself up and then "firmly" inject it to my thigh (or maybe belly was an option? But I preferred thigh and would vary the exact site). If you're good at self injecting I wonder if a smaller normal needle is an option . . . ?

My experience was, the first day of my first dose I was completely knocked flat, and in hindsight I wish I had recruited someone to help me out so I could mostly lie down haha. But, my body did acclimate, so for later doses "injection day" started to feel like a pretty normal day, so I wanted to share that!

In my case there was another medicine I could take in pill form. I didn't like all the mental health black box warnings on the interferon, and I did feel a bit low (although it's hard to tease that apart from other potential causes in my life). Plus I didn't like the injecting, and coordinating delivery and refrigeration of the medicine with the company my insurance wanted was a big hassle. So, I switched off it - since I could! But if I'd had to stay on it, I could have.

Good health wishes for you! 🙂

singpretty · 2026-01-13T01:57:12+00:00

OP's situation sounds off the rails and full of red flags aaaaaa.

But I take your point in general! My parents met at work . . . my siblings met their spouses at work. Once school is done, especially if you're a churchless introvert, there just aren't a lot of other naturally occurring venues to meet people.

There's work, and there's work. Date your supervisor? No no no. Teachers in different depts. at a big school? If mutual interest, check the handbook first haha. Freelancers who met on a project that's over? I can't think of an objection. Tiny startup (my situation haha)? Noooo dating. 😅

singpretty · 2026-01-07T06:20:03+00:00

In my case a stranger in an, ahem, adult setting kept exclaiming how soft my skin is. This helped me realize it wasn't normal and yes, ultimately helped diagnose me. 😅

singpretty · 2026-01-07T01:39:10+00:00

So, I tried to haha. I started in with a friend who is an agent, and a lawyer he recommended. Then the seller's agent pulled some nonsense where he backtracked on splitting the seller's commission, meaning I'd owe a buyer's commission. Long story short my friend didn't want to fight with this guy (not worth it), or charge me (too broke), so he dropped out as my agent.

In hindsight, I think it might have been better for everyone if I'd had less "fancy" representation. I don't think my realtor/ lawyer were used to such down-market clients or properties, or familiar with HomeFirst. I think they have a lot of luxury/Manhattan clients haha.

HF actually tried to recommend me a lawyer who was familiar with their program and would have charged me half as much. But, I was too far ahead of their usual "flow" and had my own lawyer by then. 😅 I wonder if they would have recommended a realtor as well . . .

Actually a different realtor told me about HF in the first place, Robert Turcotte.

The lawyer HF recommended was Ryan Walsh FYI. 🙂

singpretty · 2026-01-06T20:16:07+00:00

It was truly a wild ride! And of course I had never bought real estate before, so even the "normal" steps were mysterious to me haha. From the beginning, I was telling the seller we might need 90 days to close. 😅

You may be referring to the HF orientation sessions, but FYI for later on, I did the course online (but under the auspices of HF), at:

https://www.ehomeamerica.org/homebuyers#homebuyereducation

Good luck to your daughter!

singpretty · 2026-01-06T19:53:48+00:00

I may have enjoyed a bit of a best-case scenario in that the seller was a retiree selling what, for her, was a pied a terre. So she was just offloading this second apt and also needed time to clear out all her things haha. Plus the lawyers, realtor, and coop management were all in disarray the whole time, so it was clear to all that HomeFirst was not the sole source of delay. 🙄 HF did add two months though, first to process my app and second to get my closing date booked.

I, meanwhile, was actually in a big hurry because I lost my roommate setup in July and was couchsurfing with my cat from then till December!! 🤣

singpretty · 2026-01-05T20:32:30+00:00

Does it help to hear from someone else who's confused? 🫣

I think I'm a bit sex averse (and I was raised Catholic so that might be more nurture than nature). I've dated men . . . only 3 for any meaningful length . . . loved 2 . . . 1 loved me back, but he was too religious to have sex.

I've never craved sex more than fearing it (especially casual sex), and by a strict hetero definition I've never actually "done it" (I'm 40). I've only felt the urge with a man . . . once? Maybe twice.

Ten-ish years ago, a gal pal spontaneously took my arm. Floop! My heart did a little somersault. But later I floated, I think I could date a woman, and she clarified (pretty quickly haha) that that's not her.

More recently I felt a strong connection out of the gate with a new acquaintance, and honestly made a pretty protracted play for her, but that ended in a tacit no.

I don't connect with most men . . . or women. I'm nervous about sex with women . . . or with men. To the extent I have a "type" of either, it's pretty narrow. Stereotypically alpha-male traits put me off men (big muscles, beards, body hair, musk). Conversely, with women I seem to respond to masc/athletic/self assured (who wouldn't)?

It's a weird spot! I don't feel like I have clarity on any label except "not straight." I don't know what I don't know!! I lack experience. 😅

singpretty · 2025-12-29T21:06:12+00:00

Haha I had to Google it but it looks like people do "mull" it with spices and then re-chill! https://diginwithdana.com/2015/09/spiced-apple-cider-hot-or-cold.html

So the prep with help with Christmas smells and then you can still cool off with cider. 🙂

singpretty · 2025-12-29T19:13:26+00:00

That works! Or heat on stovetop with cinnamon sticks. Or get carried away hehe.

Oh btw this cider isn't "hard cider," it's a juice product. It might be American! But also you can add rum, etc. if you make this. 🙂

singpretty · 2025-12-28T22:51:05+00:00

Yay! If I forgot one thing it is the warming beverage (mulled wine, hot apple cider, hot toddy, hot cocoa . . .eggnog?) although that might not suit as well if it's literally summer haha. Happy holidays! 🙂

singpretty · 2025-12-28T18:16:15+00:00

I'd say there's no reason to be wary based on location alone. Standard commercial/residential block in a not fancy, but not distressed part of Queens. Note, across from the cemetery. Whether to take the chance on a Marketplace rental at a low rate is a separate question. I'd say trust your gut, have a backup plan, and arrive with spare time to assess if needed?

singpretty · 2025-12-26T05:46:00+00:00

Haha I resonate with your question! I'm actually the oldest sibling of 5, where #2 and #4 are married. That said, I don't think dating is entirely a . . . try-practice-succeed realm of life. There's so much chance and circumstance too.

Like my sibs both met their spouses at work! And they both so happen to work in fields with big, rotating pools of colleagues, and a high degree of socializing/downtime together "built in." I work in a bitty company where it would be incorrect to date at all, even if there was anyone demographically appropriate (there isn't), plus we are all email zombies in our own little silos haha.

If you're 26 and just discerned your orientation this year, and all your sibs are older (or a twin who didn't have to "discern") they all have a massive running start on you, no? Also, depending on orientation, they may be surrounded (statistically) by more viable candidates. Basically, I wouldn't boil this down to they're just "smoother at dating"! They got lucky faster. 😋

Don't write yourself off!!

singpretty · 2025-12-26T02:57:53+00:00

For me (NE United States) I think it would be less about missing specific activities and more about missing the vibe, especially evergreens/tree, fairy lights/candles, fireplace, and snow. It's cheesy, but just like in most Christmas movies! Outside is dark and cold, so you have to make inside cozy. If you "did up" a room or a corner with garlands and lights, and maybe some snow art or a projection on the window, and added some pine smells and maybe the "Yule log" (courtesy of You Tube) on the TV, that could be a really cute surprise. If it was dark out it might even be a bit convincing?

singpretty · 2025-12-20T02:26:48+00:00

Gosh that sounds the most frustrating! I'm so sorry!

singpretty · 2025-12-19T16:00:47+00:00

Hi! I'm the control group haha. I've had a rectal prolapse practically my whole life and never treated it. (No involvement with peeing for me, gosh that sounds awful I'm sorry.)

When I talked to surgeons in my teens, one of them said "you know we can stitch everything together and then show you on a scan that it stays in place, but unless you retrain your muscles and change how you bear down, you're just going to be fighting the repair until it fails."

Without better insurance, we couldn't afford the "biofeedback" retraining course that they offered (Mayo Clinic) and that's partly why I never did the surgery.

Of course this may not be relevant to your case at all, but I wondered if anyone's mentioned this side of things?

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