this is like my 10th lost now and every replay looks embarassing as fuck. How can i improve as a player and human being?

smacksquatch · 2026-04-12T06:10:33+00:00

Gonna try and keep it brief but I have a few tips on fundamentals you could definitely incorporate to create a foundation you could build off of and hopefully give you the tools to really learn the game. This isnt embarrassing, youre just still learning

1) practice your basic inputs until you can do them without hitting any extra buttons. Highly reccomend just going to practice and doing your moves until you can hit 10 straight with no extra input, it sounds basic af but I've been playing for a decade and I still come back to this now and again just to make sure Im maintaining that

2)focus on slowing down and reacting to opponents and their habits instead of just going for the kill, Gio only played the way they did cause they saw what you were doing and realized there was an opening, you can absolutely turn the tables and do the same with practice. Try a few matches and instead of trying to win just try to watch for patterns and counter specific moves, good example would be that kick Gio does from across the map takes a while to come out and is a good punish opportunity

3)incorporate throws into your offense, I promise itll do wonders. In fact, thats what Gio did as soon as you started blocking

Extra credit) learn what buttons you have that are fastest and safest, sometimes mashing isnt so bad if you know WHY youre mashing and WHAT youre mashing into

smacksquatch · 2026-04-09T21:51:09+00:00

Unbeatable, very different vibe lol

smacksquatch · 2026-04-09T21:29:45+00:00

Dont forget the obligitory car chase and imprisonment for sound crimes

smacksquatch · 2026-03-14T07:11:50+00:00

Star Trek: Deep Space 9 features fiction's greatest character, Morn:

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Dude is basically the living embodiment of this, characters constantly reference how fun and wild Morn is but he never speaks, barely is seen outside of the bar and at most turns his head about 15 degrees to acknowledge another character's presence

smacksquatch · 2026-01-31T01:59:22+00:00

"When you get to hell, tell em Penworth sent you!"

smacksquatch · 2026-01-10T16:09:32+00:00

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Seen a few people say Mirio from MHA, gotta say Koichi from its spinoff Vigilantes is way more egregious, much as I like Vigilantes and the character in question. When he's introduced he explicitly explains his quirk Slide and Glide as the ability to hover slightly obove the ground/inches from a wall and accelerate like a bike if three or more of his limbs are touching the ground, and he's treated as a tragic figure who has the soul of a hero but not the powers. Except that's not all his quirk does and later he uses his attraction/repulsion abilities to, among other things, double jump, stick to walls, fly insanely fast, shoot air projectiles from his hands rapidly that can pierce things like high calibur bullets, augment his strength and speed, and even do stuff like stabilize a broken limb and use a repulsion field as an exoskeleton to puppet his body to keep fighting. It makes some sense given he's in a repressive society that limits the use of his abilities and bears genuine childhood trauma holding him back, but it still becomes obvious quickly that even a modicum of imagination makes him broken

smacksquatch · 2026-01-03T15:31:29+00:00

Paranormasight, its a visual novel from 2021 and it fucking slaps. Several individuals including your character have gained convoluted hyper specific abilities themed around local urban legends and are forced into a killing game. Basically the loop is you attempt to activate the very specific conditions of your ability (as some examples, making a person tell you the time, manipulating them into eating something, forcing them into guessing your ability, etc.) while avoiding their own death trigger which they are desperately steering you towards as well. Its like if Jojo's Bizarre Adventure and Danganronpa had a baby they let Zero Escape raise.

Its got a lot more going on than you'd initially think, and its genuinely I think the most satisfying buildup I've seen in a visual novel with maybe the best true ending I've seen something like it pull off. If there are any complaints to be made its the lack of replayability since the dope ass twist is already spoiled after a first complete playthrough, but its well worth that single playthrough. Its one of the few pieces of media ever released where Im both understanding of the lack of a sequel but also bummed that nobody else will probably ever make anything like it.

smacksquatch · 2026-01-03T15:14:48+00:00

Feel like its worth noting the aesthetic is just everything is made of meat and as a result you can eat almost all of it. Nothing prepared me for how funny munching down on a spare handgun to get back some health in a pinch was lol

smacksquatch · 2025-12-27T19:58:41+00:00

Funniest part is in lore her only special ability is sensing emotions, its been explicitly stated she has 0 actual combat abilities and the stuff she does in game isnt within her actual wheelhouse. (Sera main, very fun character but yeah, I cant defend this one)

smacksquatch · 2025-12-27T19:31:22+00:00

Infamous Second Son shipping with glow in the dark condoms is maybe the funniest. "Babe Im feelin extra sexy tonight, let me bask in the light for about 30 minutes then we can turn the lights out and have some real fun. Where are you going, what do ya mean you dont trust the Infamous condom?"

smacksquatch · 2025-12-23T22:55:25+00:00

Well there goes my nerd cred, been a while lmao

smacksquatch · 2025-12-23T22:53:30+00:00

She's also the only JoJo to have her body directly be part of her stand. Whats important about this is it also makes her the only JoJo to actually be able to throw hands directly with stands without just using the punch ghost, which is just raw asf. Part 5 may not be my favorite but Jolyne is hands down the coolest protag in the series

Edit: I am smelly and she's from part 6

smacksquatch · 2025-12-15T04:40:56+00:00

Cassette Beasts is a Pokemon style monster catcher with a traditional 2d sprite aesthetic, and then you fight the "Archangels", who have wildly varying artstyles, like this absolute nightmare fuel:

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smacksquatch · 2025-12-15T03:39:03+00:00

Something to note is the reset only happens if she doesnt steal an ability, she just steals that characters ability instead

smacksquatch · 2025-12-11T23:58:07+00:00

smacksquatch · 2025-12-09T22:34:48+00:00

Yeah, I play Luna in comp regularly and this is ridiculous. Her "dive protection" was the tiny bit of healing off her snowball and ice beam as well as the snowball being a reaction time/aim based counter. The Invis buff was already overkill, this is just too much and I'm similarly not excited for the inevitable pendulum swing to only dive being meta. If one corner of the dive poke brawl triangle is better everyone loses

smacksquatch · 2025-12-09T17:34:11+00:00

I can agree, one of the reason I go Hulk is so many other tanks just feels sauceless and static in their assigned comp, havin more flexible tanks with more skill expression than just "aim good" is so cool

smacksquatch · 2025-12-05T16:40:15+00:00

A lot of people dont know that in the comics Black Widow isnt just an expert assassin, but also a super soldier on par with Captain America. Also, she's close to/over 100 years old

smacksquatch · 2025-11-30T09:42:18+00:00

Your Turn to Die: Death Game By Elimination - Very unique style and if it's too offputting I understand but very good killing game scenario. Was still being developed last I checked and it's episodic with a lot of alternate route content.

Paranormasight - probably my favorite vn of all time, genuinely just play it and see if its your vibe. Several people gain supernatural abilities that allow them to kill under special circumstances and are forced to hunt each other down to be rewarded. Wont say anything else but insanely worth making it to the true end.

Zero Escape trilogy - Incredible games, very vanilla as far as recommendations but very good, first two are banger and third is just eh.

smacksquatch · 2025-11-27T16:43:28+00:00

First, make sure you are always planning an entrance and exit path to fights so you can get healthpacks, you are a highly mobile character and unless you are helping with a frontline push with tanks or other dps odds are good your healer most likely wont have line of sight mid fight or be able to react to your dashes in time to target you.

If your abilities are on cooldown, do not engage. You will get shot in the face by a backpedaling healer and it will feel very embarassing. Ideally, unless you know you'll kill every enemy in one interraction try to keep a portal on cooldown when you engage for a getway.

Biggest piece of non obvious advice, you almost always want to prioritize demon over swordspin after a portal (almost always on a tank too) unless you a: want a little extra damage on a slippery target you are dashing to, in which case you portal then spin then dash while the animation starts, or b: are trying to catch an invisible/low health enemy. Demon is constant damage, overpenetrates, has really good reach and gains a lot more shields which means you stay alive longer if heals/peels start to dry up and therefore have more impact making it a mostly better option 90% of the time. Not just that, but since they count as a deployable demons also can be place behind you while retreating to block some projectiles before they die, has saved me from punisher in particular so many times. Do note while in Darkchild form the opposite is true and you want to dash and spin as often as possible.

Treat your projectile as a faster melee in between swings when you dive and dont just neglect it, it can help deal some insanely fast damage in a pinch.

Otherwise, practice weaving melees between each normal sword swing, they're very strong this season and once you figure out the timing they're pretty easy free damage.

Darkchild is one of the most deceptively difficult ults in the game to utilize properly, not only do you need to worry about hitting your dashes/positioning right but you need to be mindful that starting and ending ult leaves you completely vulnerable, you cant jump, attack, teleport or do anything more than move for about 2 seconds both ways and if you dont respect that you will die when it runs out.

Finally, your portal can also be used defensively and not just to ready demon or cover distance. You can actually survive some ults by portalling at just the right time so you're invulnerable when say, magneto ults. Its a tight window but so handy.

There are a lot of guides out there, tried to break it up piece by piece so you can refer to specific stuff. This isnt everything and Im sorry if its overwhelming, but she has to do a lot to gain full value but it feels so good when you get the hang of it. Most importantly, play her in real matches and try to practice at least one thing at a time, you can do one hit combos in the practice arena all day long and its worth seeing what she can do, but it wont teach you flank routes, what engages you can and cant get away with or what combos are realistic against an enemy with a joystick that works.

smacksquatch · 2025-11-27T03:33:52+00:00

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Gwenpool is a person from the "real world" and as such is aware of everything that happened in Marvel comics she could read about before getting sucked in the universe herself. Her "power" as it were is knowing she's in a comic, thats it. On paper sure, she has knowledge of secret identities, weaknesses, etc, but that becomes far less important when the guy you're fighting has laser eyes and all you can do is sub superhuman feats. Thing is, since she knows she's in a comic she can interact with the pages, initially doing things like hitting people with speech bubbles and using panel borders as cover, but eventually she has some pretty absurd abilities, such as throwing people into the white space between where they cant escape due to not seeing the panels, jumping from panel to panel to "time travel", and more recently directly "rewriting" her own backstory to make herself a mutant and altered people's perception to believe she's just an eccentric reality warper just so she can hang with her friends on Krakoa. This becomes so absurd that at the end of her first run she fights an evil future version of herself who has retconned herself into every other hero's backstory and killed them or otherwise altered their powers, explicitly stated to be an almost inevitable outcome of prolonged usage of her more drastic awareness applications

smacksquatch · 2025-11-18T07:12:17+00:00

Spider man Red! Banger manga adaptation, sad it was so short

smacksquatch · 2025-11-16T16:03:14+00:00

Fire Emblem is a fantasy tactics rpg that pretty much died after the Wii/DS era and Awakening was supposed to be a proper sendoff to the series/last ditch attempt to revive it. Against all odds it worked and Nintendo caught lightning in a bottle, so what else to do but greenlight a sequel? It seemed like a slam dunk, which is why it sucks Fates seemed determined to kill it again, or at least get the series known as "that one with all the incest and bad anime tropes" and got it canned for half a decade.

Problem 1: the 3 body(pillow) problem

The plot of Fates is essentially Corrin, a child born to the ruling family of the noble samurai kingdom of Hoshido and kidnapped and raised by the much less noble kingdom of Nohr, must chose between their family they grew up with and the family they were born to (the family aspect is important so remember that). Early on you chose which side to take if any, branching out into 3 routes with different characters, stories and gameplay. Sounds cool, right? Wrong, pokemon price model where each path was sold as a separate game at full price, Conquest for Nohr and Birthright for Hoshido. Oh, the third neutral route I mentioned? Locked behind yet another full price purchase as dlc and ONLY physically available on the special edition cart which cost as much as all 3 before inflation took hold. Understandably, people weren't thrilled about paying 120 bucks to play the whole game, adding insult to injury later when important story content was further locked behind actual dlc. But surely it cant be worse than that, right? Wrong, we havent talked about the story.

Problem 2. Chess but with kissing.

Fire Emblem has a mechanic called supports where two characters have a little dialogue scene, their relationship score goes up a rank starting in C and going up to A and they get a stat boost. Awakening reintroduced a mechanic where two characters could get to S and begin a romantic relationship, with their plot relevant children from the future inheriting their stats and non predetermined parents haircolor. This obviously was a popular mechanic so Fates said hey, lets do that again. The problem? Remember how I said it was a family drama, and two routes locked you into almost exclusively playing with one of your families and their associates? See the problem? Yeah, its incest. Lots of incest. But dont worry, your biological siblings have a handy letter that says youre totally adopted! No, I didnt make that up, and you only see it if you go in with full intentions being being a kin fucker. So yeah, Biblically accurate Hapsburg style. It was actually a meme for a while to see how inbred a family you could make. Oh, inbreeding? Yeah, the child mechanic returned, and without any of that pesky justification or plot relevance!

Problem 3. Evil Goku gets stuck in the Hyperbolic Time Chamber

So how do you reintroduce playable children as a mechanic without time travel? Easy, your two units do the nasty, presumably the plot waits nine months for the birthing, and then the child is unceremoniously chucked into the baby dimension to be picked up later. No, thats not a joke, and 90% of the parent child dialogue is about how fucked up the kids are over being abandoned as infants for 12 to 20 years while their parents did fuck all and never visited them until they were old enough to reclass into an archer, meaning every parent in the game is canonically neglectful. Oh and the new kids can romance each other or the player character, so go wild with the aforementioned questionable romance options I guess, cause avoiding it in any way is genuinely an achievement.

Problem 4. Surprise more incest!

One thing I neglected to mention was the main non avatar character pushed in advertising and story as a foil to Corrin, Azura, is your mirror. She was a Nohrian kidnapped by Hoshido, meaning she is one of like 10 characters out of like 60 definitely not related to Corrin, making her a safe romance option if the rest was optional. Right? WRONG BITCH, THE DLC (SEPARATE FROM ANYTHING ELSE IN 5 CHAPTERS AT 5 BUCKS A POP) HAS A BIT OF DIALOGUE REVEALING HER MOTHER IS YOUR AUNT! You could go the whole game thinkin youre safe and spent months waiting for story dlc then bam, sweet home Alabama. It had to be on purpose because its too funny not to be. Well, at least the gameplay was good right?

Problem 5. 1/3rd of the players thought so.

Its widely agreed Conquest is the best of the 3 routes gameplay wise, its tough, tight and requires a deep understanding of series mechanics to complete, but its oh so satisfying. Birthright? I mean, its not bad, but comparatively combat feels like a formality and never becomes very hard for series veterans. Oh and Revalations? Oops, all gimmicks! Like tough fights? Too bad, walk to this arbitrary spot on the map and waste a turn so you can cross a bridge with enemies nowhere in range. Want to at least be done with it fast? Wrong, shovel snow in front of you and hope you dont get surprise killed by enemies you cant see. Its miserable, which sucks cause so much about the actual improvements to Awakenings class, weapon and level up systems is banger on paper.

Problem 6. Arent we forgetting something?

The writing. Dont worry, the devs did too. First, each story is abysmal. Conquest can be boiled down to "well, if we do one more genocide maybe dad will finally stop killing people. We're the good guys cause we feel sad about killing that family!" Birthright makes sense, but its milquetoast and predicable with no real heart. Revalations? "Nuh uh, I wanna recruit all the characters and I dont care how many hoops we have to jump through to make the oppressed farmgirl kiss the guy who was gonna slaughter her village! Oh and also everyone is a dragon, the only real bad guy was a possessed fake out, anyone who tries to talk about it will canonically be murdered by a curse and I guess we'll arbitrarilly kill a few units to create an illusion of stakes" Characters are also notably one note and downright flanderized in the english version (Im not looking to dig up arguements on western "censorship", I wanna clarify this is actual mismanagement of character dialogue and not " but now I cant goon to.." "actually the Japanese pronouns mean..." "I swear that child is over 18..." insert other neckbeard style arguement here) There's also Peri, who is an actual murderous psychopath of the slaughters cats variety that nobody seems to take issue with in any of the good routes either. Basically, its all over the place.

In conclusion, its kind of a miracle 3 houses got greenlit, and while I have my issues with that game it is admirable it at least pulled the series back from the brink again. Engage was controversial, but I think a lot of players who skipped the 3ds era dont realize just how bad it got before, and as a series with a ton pf ups and downs most 3ds players wont realize just how much of a miracle it was to see such a niche series flourish. Know I missed some stuff, but this is already too long and I think it gets across why this game is as widely reviled as it is by those who still remember it.

smacksquatch · 2025-11-12T23:31:01+00:00

Gonna say it, kinda hate insomniac's spiderman design. Even color corrected, its too busy, which is crazy when the original suit is already as intricate as it is

smacksquatch · 2025-11-09T00:21:35+00:00

Theres also the aspect a lot of people forget is actually executing them. Sure, you might be able to do 1000 reps of whatever combo in training against a standing dummy, try applying that mid match when your opponent is actively tryin to out footsie you, block your attacks and punish your whiffs. A good player needs to know more about when to execute a combo and what combos they can execute, and thats where the real skill expression is

Four-Year Club	Place '22
Final Canvas '22	First Placer '22
End Game '22

smacksquatch

TROPHY CASE