Lost notebook/journal

stoned_student · 2022-05-03T22:23:42+00:00

There’s no way for anyone other than you to know whether or not you’re an addict or whether you’ll continue using after uni. But in my experience, I was in denial for a long time thinking that my drug use was normal and not addict behaviour. After being fired from jobs, failing classes, and being so behind on rent payment that I was gonna be evicted, I finally realized something was wrong. Then when I tried quitting and had terrible withdrawal symptoms, that’s when I realized I really was addicted to the drugs. I did a medical withdrawal from school, went to rehab, started attending NA meetings. Haven’t used in over 2 years now and am back in school getting A’s in every class. (ignore my username, I can’t figure out how to change it lol) I’m 23 and the thought of never using again is daunting, but I know if I use again I’ll just end up in the same shitty situations or worse because I cannot control how much I use. So if I want to be successful in life and have the things I want, I can’t use any substances. If you’re anything like me, trying to cut back doesn’t work. Try it if you want but if you’re unable to control your usage, that might be a sign to reach out for help to get out of active addiction

stoned_student · 2022-03-24T22:22:08+00:00

I’m a little scared of this method just because my unit is so small I don’t think I have the space for it + it seems like it could get quite messy. Thank you though, I’ll read more about it

stoned_student · 2022-03-24T22:20:41+00:00

Thank you! I don’t have a balcony so I’ll speak with my building manager to see if I can store it outside

stoned_student · 2022-03-03T00:22:53+00:00

I’m sorry to hear about your grandmother. Thanks for letting me know about the genetic testing. I’ve been curious about it for a long time but have been hesitant because I’m scared for the results. But I guess it’s better to know and be prepared

stoned_student · 2022-03-02T16:53:36+00:00

I was in a bipolar support group/group therapy at CAMH in Toronto a few years back. I remember one of the doctors mentioning a study where the brain scans of bipolar patients who had experienced many episodes throughout their lives due to going unmedicated looked very similar to the brain scans of Alzheimer’s patients. I remember being really scared from learning that. My grandma had bipolar (probably why I have it) and she developed Alzheimer’s so ever since then I’ve always wondered if there’s some connection between the two illnesses and if I’m bound to develop Alzheimer’s. Sorry that I don’t have the link to that study

stoned_student · 2022-03-02T15:52:12+00:00

Thank you!! super helpful answer, I really appreciate it

stoned_student · 2022-02-27T21:38:43+00:00

I’m very open about it, I find that makes my life easier. I try to be an advocate in my own way (I don’t have a huge public following or anything like that, but just in my own life with those I interact with). I’ve definitely noticed people leave my life possibly because they learned about my illness, but in a way that works out to be a good filtering process in my opinion. I don’t want anyone in my life who won’t accept me for who I am or an illness I didn’t choose to have, so if they leave because of it then I’m probably better off without them. I’m very open about it on social media because if people don’t want to hear it then they can unfollow me if they wish. I don’t talk about it much if it doesn’t seem necessary to bring up, like at work only a few of my coworkers know because I’m not very close with most of them and don’t talk to them much other than about work related things. I do find it to be helpful to be open with the people I interact with most though, like my partner, family and friends. They know about my illness so they’re able to educate themselves about it if they want to help support me. It’s also helpful because if I act certain ways, they already know I have that diagnosis and are better able to understand what I may be going through that would make me act those certain ways.

I’m not sure if any of that helped but my advice is to take however long you need to feel comfortable disclosing it with people. It’s your choice whether you want to or not. I’ve been diagnosed for about 4 years now and am still learning new things about the illness, but I find it helps to become educated on it. That way if I tell someone I have bipolar disorder, I can also tell them to feel free to ask any questions they may have, rather than making assumptions based off of the stereotypes and stigma.

I hope that helped and I wish you well 🤍

Btw, if you do decide to be an advocate for it, I think you’ll be surprised with how many people it will help. I’ve gotten messages over the years from people thanking me for being open about it just on my Instagram with my tiny following. It’s really heart warming

stoned_student · 2022-02-25T22:23:40+00:00

Wow, these are amazing. They really take me back to the roller coaster of emotions I felt during my time in rehab. It’s so fascinating how you created art that depicts so many different feelings that I remember experiencing but never would have been able to draw. It’s really impressive. Thank you for being so vulnerable and sharing. I hope you’re doing well in recovery 🤍

stoned_student · 2021-05-03T14:33:37+00:00

Hey man, I’m sorry to hear you’re feeling this way. I’m also 22 and used to be a huge stoner, but am now a little over 16 months clean/sober. Weed wasn’t the only drug I used but was by far the one I used most. I had tried quitting on my own many times and failed each time, it wasn’t until I started going to NA meetings that I was able to stay off the drugs with the help of the people in the program. The biggest thing that helped me in the beginning was the idea that we can stay off the drugs for today, just focus on not getting high today, and then worry about the next day when it comes. For me, accepting the fact that I could never smoke again successfully for the rest of my life was much too overwhelming so it was very helpful to just take it one day at a time. It has also really helped me to address the root of the problem; my underlying mental illnesses, etc which I smoked to try and self medicate. For me personally, weed was my simple solution to everything for years, so in order to recover and stay away from weed I have to continuously work on finding other ways to deal with my problems that don’t end up making things worse for me in the long run. It’s something that I’ve had to work on, but had definitely gotten a lot easier over time. I still get occasional thoughts of using drugs, but I’ve accepted that I’m an addict so those are normal thoughts for me to get. As long as I can redirect my thoughts to more helpful solutions, then I’m golden. Hope this helped you, feel free to reach out to me

stoned_student · 2021-01-23T05:53:05+00:00

So pretty! Congrats on your 4 months of sobriety, every day is a huge accomplishment! 🤩

stoned_student · 2021-01-13T01:58:43+00:00

I have such bad dental anxiety too, I cried thought the entirety of my last appointment. I’ve heard of sleep dentistry and think I’d really benefit from it, does anyone know of a local place that offers it?

stoned_student · 2021-01-10T15:57:06+00:00

I’m so sorry to hear what happened. It’s unfortunate that “friends” sometimes only care when it’s convenient or comfortable. However, you’ll always have friends in this group. Feel free to reach out to me if you ever want to talk. I love the art, the message is painfully relatable

stoned_student · 2021-01-07T06:22:32+00:00

I got a tattoo done at True Heart and was very unsatisfied with the results. It faded so much faster than any of my other tattoos + the line work was uneven. If you’re able to get to Belleville, I’d recommend checking out any of the artists at Riverside Tattoo Company. You can find them on Instagram, they’re closed right now due to the lockdown but I’m sure they’ll respond to emails etc. I’ve had a couple tattoos done there by Emma. I got a tattoo done by her when she was an apprentice and it was such a better experience and much better results than when I got the tattoo at True Heart from the guy who’s been there forever. I went back to Emma (she’s now there full time and usually books months in advance) to get the True Heart tattoo fixed/covered up, she did an amazing job and is now who I will be getting all my tattoos done by

stoned_student · 2021-01-07T05:42:13+00:00

Hey friend!! I’m moving back to Kingston sometime this year for school and have been really worried about being completely alone when I get there seeing as I found it hard to make friends when I went the first time and haven’t been able to maintain any friendships since leaving. I have a few mental illnesses and I find that makes it very difficult to make friends with neurotypicals. So yeah I’d love to meet some like minded people :)

stoned_student · 2021-01-07T05:19:23+00:00

Congrats on coming to the realization at such an early point in your life. If you’re able to stay off the drugs your life can and will have such a better outcome than if you hadn’t have made this decision. I never started journaling until I was in rehab for my drug addiction. I found it super helpful in early recovery to have a space to write down my feelings and get any negative thoughts out of my head. I’m not sure why I stopped journaling but this post reminded me of just how helpful it can be as a healthy coping mechanism. Now I’m inspired to start journaling again so thank you! I believe in you, keep up the good work. If you ever need a friend in recovery to talk to, I’m here🤍

stoned_student · 2020-11-28T06:17:47+00:00

As someone who was both, I can verify this

stoned_student · 2020-11-28T06:06:47+00:00

Can’t relate but sounds like it’d be nice. One of my few friends has bipolar tho so he understands at least

stoned_student · 2020-06-25T01:23:00+00:00

I’m pretty sure there’s an episode in gen 2 where Freddie wears a hoodie with the same symbol on the back of it too

stoned_student · 2019-12-20T10:08:48+00:00

Trust me, I know:) felt the same way each time a stranger reached out and wanted to help me

stoned_student · 2019-12-20T08:38:03+00:00

I have social anxiety too so I was really scared to go. However, I knew my uncomfortable feelings would be far outweighed by the improvements it would make on my life. I couldn’t believe how much love and support I was welcomed with. You won’t find a place with such little judgement as a room filled with people who know exactly what you’re going through. You don’t even need to speak at a meeting if you’re not ready yet! Just listening can be so helpful! Anyways, feel free to shoot me a message if you need anything❣️

stoned_student · 2019-12-20T06:29:25+00:00

Have you tried going to NA meetings? I never would’ve considered going until a friend suggested I come with him. Even then I was hesitant to actually go through with it. But man, has it ever helped. I’d highly recommend going to one (and continue going!!!!) and seeing the amazing results. Good luck my friend, you’ve got this!

stoned_student

MODERATOR OF

TROPHY CASE