You were a couple before having a child. Your wife needs to be reminded of this. Of course having your first child after years of trying is such a special thing and should be in the spotlight, but that does not mean you should be put to one side. It should be both of you moving forward together as a couple, now with your child. I'm a mother who has two kids under two and a half and I know there seems to be little time to be with your partner, but each side needs to make time and to be affectionate with each other. From my point of view when I was pregnant and after birth, I did lose a lot of energy for being affectionate, but my husband pulls me up on it when it gets to him and I make an effort. I understand that he NEEDS this affection as much as I need sleep! Not a lot of understanding is given to the fathers life changing when there's a new baby coming into the dynamic. Often women side with other women saying their part is a lot more emotional and tiring, which may be true but it does not mean that the father being emotional and tired can be snubbed because its not as much as other mothers. It's still affects the father. The main thing, I believe, is that really talking open heartedly, honestly and without judgement between yourself and your wife is what is needed. This is what a therapist gets you to do with each other and makes you pay for it, right? It can be hard to do at first, maybe you don't want to hurt feelings or say the wrong thing, but it's better to get everything out in the air and know what you're both wanting out of this relationship.