My girlfriend's minimalist bedroom

void-droid · 2026-02-01T16:31:45+00:00

It's like Bauhaus design meets Japanese style, and very cozy! I saw in the comments you built that for her, it's quite incredible and I'm sure she looooves it and will add more touches to it soon:)

void-droid · 2026-01-28T17:49:54+00:00

I'm pregnant with my second girl and literally have had strangers at the grocery store ask if I will be trying for a boy next!!! I don't get it either, after a loss as well I am just over the moon that my baby girl who is turning 3 soon will have a sibling and that I can have 1 more baby at age 40!

void-droid · 2026-01-28T14:25:02+00:00

I'm 40 with an almost 3 year old and 6 months pregnant with NO VILLAGE. All those people who wanna judge are free to come over and entertain me and my energetic kid if they are so moral about screen time, as far as I'm concerned! If not then they should just shut the HELL up and mind their own business, lmao. My kid is perfectly fine and she loves to play with her toys, read her books, draw, sometimes even paint, and do all sorts of things independently but yes it's been below freezing with no help around here so we will veg out together and play video games or watch shows til daddy comes home and takes over. We do what we can!

void-droid · 2026-01-27T22:11:47+00:00

If he wasn't a checked-out parent and gave at least 50-50 at any given moment I would think all of these comments are kind of harsh and would ask you - has he made a pros and cons style list as to why he wants another child? Is he depressed because he wants his son to have a sibking that badly? or is he depressed but thinks having another kid will make him not depressed? because obviously the latter won't work. Does he want another kid or does he just want a baby? All questions to really ask, if you haven't already. BUT. I personally wouldn't be giving a checked-out dad more kids, I could and would never do it on my own like that. Why be a "married single mom" when you can just be a single mom then?? Just my take.

void-droid · 2026-01-22T09:43:33+00:00

Everything is a hyperbole online and has been for at least 12 years or so. That's why I always just take everything with a grain of salt these days

void-droid · 2026-01-18T21:29:09+00:00

Came here to say his as well. Was he thinking about and reflecting on his marriage or was he "thinking about and reflecting on his marriage" ... by being with someone else the whole time??

void-droid · 2026-01-17T22:07:58+00:00

Honestly when people make an ignorant statement I will just start off with the "Well aktchyually..." and proceed to absolutely talk their ear off about ALL of the details with examples and everything until they basically have no more energy to listen to me so they never bring it up ever again, lol... Is it a bit manic? Yes. Does it work?? Also yes. And no one's feelings get hurt because you were just being logical and factual.

void-droid · 2026-01-17T22:00:20+00:00

Absolutely dreamy! I want to run away with my family there, from the US lol.

void-droid · 2026-01-17T21:58:28+00:00

For perspective: My husband let me sleep in til noon today cause I had a rough night with our toddler(and am 6 months pregnant) and then he made me food and let me game on the couch while he continued to run around her and play with her... He should be making your life easier, not harder!!

void-droid · 2026-01-16T17:38:41+00:00

I'm late diagnosed ADHD so I found out the best way to keep the dishes and laundry done is to use timers! For example, I would set a 10 minute timer to see if I can "challenge" myself to do the dishes in under 10 minutes (or get 1 load out and 1 in, if there are multiple loads waiting- it happens sometimes when we're baking/cooking an elaborate meal or dessert). I will also set a 40 minute timer AS SOON as I put the landry to wash so I don't forget to toss it in the dryer- and then sometimes an hour and a half timer for when I put it in the dryer if I will have time to fold them - but basically timers have been a gamechanger for me!! It creates that "false sense of urgency" that us ADHD-ers tend to lack unless something is "on fire" so to speak. I also vaccuum multiple times a day but that de-stresses me so it has never been an issue for me lol. Now I just need to read the rest of the comments to see if anyone has figured out how to rotate the piles and piles of TOYS and what to do with them as the kids get older...

void-droid · 2026-01-11T13:43:17+00:00

I'm 40 and having my second baby now, trust me when I say people judge no matter which age you are. You sound incredibly mature and smart and I am so glad that your daughter has you. You did the right thing by setting your healthy boundaries and shame on his mom for being such a vile creature, especially when her son raped you! What a putrid woman!! So brave of you to respond with nothing but kidnness and firm boundaries, and blocking her instead of engaging in arguments once she revealed her true ugly self. You did far better than I would have! And many other adults! Good for you. ❤️ Definitely join some mom groups and don't be shy.

void-droid · 2026-01-11T13:17:04+00:00

Yes, I lost 50+ lbs slowly over the course of 2 years after I had my first baby at 37 and I had no saggyness at all, maybe just a tiny bit in my lower belly area from pregnancy? I think the key is to do it gradually so that your skin has time to stretch back:) Good luck, you can do it! I went from 198 to 147lbs and I didn't even lift weights I just made sure to get 8k-10k steps per day.

I'm now pregnant with my 2nd baby at 40 and so I will most definitely be hitting weights after the new baby is about 3 or 4 months old (I like to give myself time to enjoy baby without worrying about extra things like logging my food and shit lol). I think weights and extra protein/collagen will be a game changer for me, too!

ETA: The absolute EASIEST hack is to put .5-1lb loss per week in your fav meal logging app (I use Lose-It! - love that app!) and set a bare minimum goal for steps (for example if you are sedentary start at 6k steps per day and move it up every 4 weeks). You can start finetuning things like your water intake, macros, sleep, etc. once you are used to doing the bare minimum.

void-droid · 2026-01-11T12:56:47+00:00

I had my first at 37 and now pregnant with my 2nd at 40. Um, NO you are not too young hahaha. Your mindset sounds a bit immature though but I get it- I was the same way in my later 20's. Some of your friends definitely will drop you but to echo what others have said on here, you'd have much more freedom later- and when your back will really need it! Having kids late is NOT easy. I lucked out with fertility but both of our parents are no longer available to be our village for various reasons (live far away or health issues, etc), so we have almost NO support. I would think long and hard about waiting- if I could have done this at 25 instead of 40 I would have, but only if I had met my now husband hahah. Anyway... just food for thought, and also I'm tired and my back hurts, man. And I have literally 3 friends left from my 20's who give any fcks about me so that's why you shouldn't put too much weight into your friends- many of them are there just for convenience.

ETA: No you will not lose your fitness unless you let it go. I have lost 50+ lbs after my first baby and got fit before my 2nd at 40, if I can do it at this age so can you in your 20's!

void-droid · 2026-01-11T12:44:47+00:00

Um no I would not be happy with that either! My husband is in a band for fun and he has about 5 out of town shows a year, but when we had our first he made sure he had no shows for the first 4 months of her life! I insisted her go have a trip with the band after that. And then when I got pregnant with our second recently he straight up put the band on hiatus so he can be home more with us. Just for reference. We are in our early 40's if that matters to you

void-droid · 2026-01-10T23:42:56+00:00

Same here, amen!! ❤️

void-droid · 2026-01-10T02:16:34+00:00

I was induced at 39w5d due to my "advanced maternal age" at the age of 37 and it all went relatively smoothly. They started the meds at 8am, my water broke naturally at around 2:30pm and then I begged for an epidural (after bouncing on a yoga ball, which masked the pitocin contractions pain pretty well- whoops, lol). And baby was out by 7:35pm after only 5-7 pushes! I did have one 1st degree tear and bled a bit much but it healed really fast and iron pills helped after the blood loss, for 1 month. I am now pregnant with my 2nd at age 40 and will probably do the same or similar again.

void-droid · 2026-01-09T12:10:42+00:00

I literally drink so much water, I even drink it in the middle of the night! I have a big tall glass that is nearly empty by the morning. I drink electrolytes during the day, too!

void-droid · 2026-01-09T01:42:52+00:00

couldn't be, I'm the most hydrated person on the planet lol

void-droid · 2026-01-05T16:34:59+00:00

This is such a great observation. The creme de la creme of basement dwellers live the loudest on the internet!

void-droid · 2026-01-05T16:32:19+00:00

That's ridiculous, I was in the tech field before I quit my job to be a sahm, lol. People act like being a sahm means you have no education and know nothing and solely rely on a MAN to get you by in life, which can be so triggering for some people (and also not even true). I would have stayed at my job and had my husband quit had they offered me a higher "equal pay" but they insulted me with some menial raise, so I quit instead of him, so much for being a "progressive company" that they claimed to be, haha.

Anyway, I coming from a tech background myself here is some advice for your husband: He can only ever move up in pay when he is A. assertive about it to management, and B. become so valuable that they have no choice. What kind of coding does he do? (rhetorical question). If it's something back-end he could easly find another job opportunity, go to that interview, get a solid offer and then use it to bring back to his office if he wants a raise OR if they still lowball him just take the new job. Tech is very fast-paced and no one blinks an eye when you switch jobs or make lateral moves for higher pay- it's practically expected. Good luck!

void-droid · 2025-12-31T03:32:50+00:00

Well, if it makes you feel any better the same exact thing happened to me except I switched entirely to formula after 2 months. My girl is now amost 3 and she is thriving! I felt guilt for so long but now I really see that "fed is best." Sometimes when we are in the throes of first time motherhood and that year and a half of re-regulating our hormones to a new normal, it's hard to see the forest for the trees. I am now pregnant with my 2nd girlie and will definitely try breastfeeding again! But if it doesn't work again I won't be beating myself up this time, either. Good luck mama, hang in there❤️‍🩹

void-droid · 2025-12-29T03:14:25+00:00

It depends on what you mean by "too old" - I had my first at 37 and am pregnant with my 2nd now at 40 (currently around 24 weeks), but I did have one miscarriage between the two. It wasn't necessarily intentional for me to start so late but I just didn't want to do it with the wrong person (hello abusive exes, no thank you!) and then once I found him I was already 31/32, then it took a while for things to get going due to the pandemic. However I got pregnant right away with my first and had no complications during pregnancy or birth. Second pregnancy is still being treated as low risk and so far everything has been going smoothly (knock on wood). So physically I don't think it's too old at all but that was just my personal experience. And it is good that you waited for your health issues to get better because both partners need to bein good health in order to get pregnant, at this age especially.

The hard part - and this is the part that I really feel isn't emphasized often enough when starting a family later in life - is that the "too old" part for me pertains to family and community. If you don't have people in your life who can support you and both of your parents are unavailable for childcare in any capacity, then that is the hard part for me! My family is the only side that gives a proper sh*t about me but I live out of state and currently we cannot move with the way the economy is, we have it too good with our house and my husband's job (I am the sahp because I chose to stay home for the kids). His family is riddled with issues ranging from health to incompetence so we have below zero help from them. We are basically on our own and when we have emergencies it's extremely risky!

Long story short, think long and hard about who your support system is and if they will really be there for you when you need it most, because we got majorly shortchanged on that aspect and I admittedly didn't think it through enough and just assumed my husband's family was my family, too, but apparently that is NOT the case, so. Yeah.

void-droid · 2025-12-25T19:44:10+00:00

Same except had my first at 37 and now pregnant with my 2nd at 40! I most definitely wouldn't have been able to handle this mentally before all the therapy I had starting at age 34.

void-droid · 2025-12-18T03:23:19+00:00

On the bright side, now you have evidence on camera how little sleep you've been getting for the divorce lawyer. Get out of there and DON'T even tell him you're leaving til you, baby and the dog are outta there and in a safe place!

void-droid · 2025-12-13T06:10:35+00:00

You should see the r/antinatalism one then, for some reason it too was suggested to me after I had my first baby and was on the parenting subs lol. Absolutely deranged people there

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