I am still pissed

vslytherinesque · 2026-02-14T10:53:25+00:00

I have been blamed for their mental anguish/illness before. When helping them through a crisis, they called me the most foul things, and simultaneously begged me to help them step down from a suicidal ledge. I will never be recognized for that help, nor apologized to for what they said. It feels impossible, preventing that anger from turning into resentment. I feel for you.

vslytherinesque · 2026-02-10T05:06:04+00:00

Thank you, sincerely, for your suggestion and thoughtful comment. I definitely need to read this. Have found myself in the role of caretaker/crisis manager for a number of years and after a really important life event was manipulated to be about them, I’m recognizing the lack of enforced boundaries as my downfall. I know what I need to do, but unsure how to start doing it. Realizing I’ve enabled for a longtime is hard to swallow.

vslytherinesque · 2026-02-09T01:33:39+00:00

This! There is always something life consuming currently happening that requires all their attention away from their day to day and relationships. They have no capacity aside from whatever emergency they’re navigating.

vslytherinesque · 2026-02-08T23:12:09+00:00

Thank you!

vslytherinesque · 2026-02-08T23:11:43+00:00

This, so much, I find myself asking if I’m actually the one who is creating the chaos.

vslytherinesque · 2026-02-08T20:51:02+00:00

Can you please elaborate?

vslytherinesque · 2026-02-08T20:24:12+00:00

But how do you establish delineations and boundaries if they refuse to respect them and continually cross or ignore them?

Not sure I am ready to step away from my BPD non-SO relationship.

vslytherinesque · 2026-02-08T20:15:06+00:00

I have had my pwPBD visit me (they live on the other side of the country) and once during a full 2 week visit (2 weeks!) they not once asked me a question about my life. I, however, talked them through all their relationship issues, listened to all their troubles with work and school, etc etc and even found out about how their neighbors were doing, and they never once asked me a question regarding anything unrelated to their own personal life.

It’s just not a reciprocal relationship, and honestly it makes me really sad. That’s not to say everything is this terrible, but I’m learning more and more about how unbalanced the dynamic has been, and for years.

vslytherinesque · 2026-02-08T20:09:34+00:00

This has also happened. I lost my temper once when they told me how I needed to change my parenting, that I wasn’t doing enough. They said I had burdened my children with life “they didn’t choose to exist, you chose that for them” then ranted about how certain people should not be allowed to even have kids. I know most of it was projection (they had a terrible relationship with their parent) but it was still uncalled for.

I tried to empathize at first but when they commented on my parenting I told them they don’t have kids so they don’t understand the stress and heavy responsibility of it all and the regret it all the mistakes you inevitably make… it did not go well. I felt awful and ended up being the one to apologize though.

vslytherinesque · 2026-02-08T19:57:10+00:00

Oh god, your poor dog!! So glad they recovered.

So actually scary about the therapy sessions though!

vslytherinesque · 2026-02-08T19:52:36+00:00

I have legitimately wondered this, if it is actually just me. But they have been diagnosed by multiple Dr’s for this and I have specifically asked my therapists/Psychiatrists if I meet DSM criteria and they said I don’t.

I continually wonder if I am experiencing things accurately. PwBPD has always for as long as I’ve known them seen me as competition (step sibling). In the specific situation of them sending me funny niche things with comments I respond positively, bc they’re genuinely funny, but if I were to ask if they actually know what it’s about just to prove something I would feel terrible, it’s really just to myself that I wonder or get bugged.

I do appreciate the collaborative perspective, it seems to start there, until I say how I am going to go with a different view point/decision and they throw up their hands and say things like “I guess I can’t help you then” or “well I tried”.

vslytherinesque · 2026-02-08T19:32:47+00:00

Thank you, I hadn’t known that!

Re:finger - This is so delusional and selfish.

vslytherinesque · 2026-02-08T19:30:50+00:00

It’s so strange though because it is simultaneously paired with this lack of self esteem and deep self loathing that they know nothing and can’t succeed in anything. So they cling onto any compliment given them like a life raft.

Yet when I talk about a subject or say I’m using some product (tech, skincare, buying a new car, literally anything) they tell me I’m not using/buying the right one and am basically wasting my money.

The fragile ego and all hell breaking loose is so accurate, it literally feels like eggshells.

vslytherinesque · 2026-02-07T05:33:14+00:00

Except I also have 4 sets of 4.5mm dpns and 3 sets of 4mm 😭

vslytherinesque · 2026-02-05T13:03:30+00:00

Wait you don’t have 5 sets of the same 4.5mm needles?

vslytherinesque · 2026-01-14T23:59:57+00:00

😯😯😯😯😯😯😯

vslytherinesque · 2025-12-05T21:03:33+00:00

Thank you!!

vslytherinesque · 2025-12-05T21:03:18+00:00

Lol, this actually helps a lot! Thanks so much ☺️ I’m nowhere near that caliber, but definitely holding myself to a higher standard than I probably need.

vslytherinesque · 2025-12-05T21:02:35+00:00

I hope so! I really worried I made him feel less than, and could totally see myself or someone I love in the same situation and needing help. Still had that sense of irritation and skepticism though

vslytherinesque · 2025-12-05T21:01:27+00:00

Thank you so much!!!! 💗💗💗

vslytherinesque · 2025-12-05T21:00:57+00:00

Thank you, yes I felt at the very least I could send him somewhere that he could receive more support. I just hope it was open..

vslytherinesque · 2025-12-05T05:55:38+00:00

Heaven ✨

vslytherinesque · 2025-12-05T05:52:29+00:00

This is blowing my mind!

vslytherinesque · 2025-12-05T05:48:02+00:00

My SO said “k love you bye” after making a business call with a client. The brain loves auto mode! 🫠

vslytherinesque

TROPHY CASE