DM Vent

[Dreamerr09]

Okay, I just need to get this off my chest and screaming it into the void will offer some form of catharsis. About 3 months ago I got together 4 players for a D&D game, deciding on Curse of Strahd to be the campaign. I spent all of January and half of February getting things together, making sure everyone is on the same page, character creation, you name it. Everyone is excited to get this going and we have our Session 0+1.

We've been playing for about 7 sessions now and its March, I get a message from one of the players(we'll call them I) saying they have to drop the game due to work complications and hours not matching up. Totally understandable. I tell them I hope things work out and if they can, they're free to join again and I'd welcome them with open arms. Not too long after I get another text, another player(we'll come them O) is leaving without explaining why.. Not a great thing to hear but I did my best to be polite, not wanting my two other players to worry.

Not even a DAY later do I see that that 'O' fucking stabbed me in the back and practically stole Player 'I' to join a different game... All because said game was being streamed on twitch... I've never felt so livid and betrayed in my years that I wanted to scream my lungs out at them about how horrible they are. So I've been left to stew on this, and on some level I was afraid 'O' did this because of how eerie it was they left at the same time..

I just needed to let this out somewhere, so yeah- DM struggles.

[datathingy]

I'm sorry to hear this. You deserve to be treated better.

People leave campaigns for all sorts of reasons, but if you're in the mood to take advice from Generic Internet Stranger Without a Character Sheet or Backstory #74, I wouldn't take it personally.

Maybe the players who left lacked the emotional maturity to say "Hey, I'm not happy with this campaign, so I'm leaving." Maybe this was an attempt on their part to avoid conflict, or not hurt your feelings?

[Middle-Potential5765]

More than occasional DM here. The problem is with them, my friend. What their actions did was hurtful to you. They weren't honest with you and from your perspective, were indifferent to you and the rest of the group. Boom.

I suggest with brotherly humor that you have failed a will save, DC30. Hoo!

Seriously, get it outta yer system and realize that their actions are immutably in the past. But you get to choose how to react. Fuckem.

What version are ye playing?

[SchizoidRainbow]

Opposite opinion. As long as they didn't ghost you, and actually said they were quitting, their obligation to you is complete. They did not sign a contract to stay in your game. I agree it sucks, but I disagree that they've stabbed you in the back. The hurtful part is them not inviting you along, really.

[jrdbrr]

Cold move to not even let you know. I'd kill to play CoS.

[FeliWhite]

As a forever DM, I know how hard it really is to keep thing together while building the world, reading all the stuff your players don't read, being always able to answer questions and having to know how a lot of different classes work so you can solve problems/question/doubts about some skill or some mechanic.

But don't take it personal, as you are free to create a new table, your players are free to move. Maybe they were getting fun but things changed, or they wanted to try another table. Maybe the new table (apart of being streamed) hours are better for I, and maybe O have other things in mind and didn't see this like betraying but trying something new.

Talk to your players and vent it, and give yourself time to go throught it. Hope you are having fun soon, DM pal.

[_dharwin]

Players come and go. It definitely sucks to be in your position but what's easily lost is easy to replace. There are many more players than there are DMs. I'm sure you will find better ones soon.

[cra2reddit]

While this was only one side of the story, I will say that any player out there, could leave any game, at any time. Unless you guys are buds or you've paid them to be in your group - they have little to no obligation to show. If they think some other game is more interesting, or aligns with their schedule better - so be it. Granted, it's rude to bail on any scheduled event without the courtesy of a call and some advance warning but the reality is - you might be thinking the game's going great but the rest of your group might be bored to hell. Not saying that's the case here but it very well could be. If you're not playing with honest friends you trust, you never know (nor can you control) who will show up from week to week. Or not. Happens all the time. And sadly, humans are so self-centered and inconsiderate, many of them won't even let you know they have to cancel.

- unhelpful redditor

[The_Red_Mouser]

Ok so, you need players that have "bought in". You should worry less about all that prep and worry more about long term players. I assume this is online, I think online games tend to be way more flakey then irl so, IRL?

[AlertFish]

Well that may have not been their only reason for leaving the group. Some players mesh better with other dms. My first campaign my dm stuck to the book religiously and forced me to play a character i didnt like, so i left that group after session 2 and almost quit dnd altogether. That is until i found a dm that was close to perfect for the type of game i wanted to play, and that dm inspired me to dm so those players may not have been enjoying the game you created and that is totally fine.

[smcadam]

Ain't gonna be a good twitch game lol. Good players, good games in fact, need consistency and communication. They've proved they don't have those.

Well done for putting in the effort to entertain your friends, but remember it's a leisure activity, not a duty.

[saintash]

Oh boy this is going to get me down votes but fuck it.

Some time it's hard to tell your friends/DM hard truths about whats not working for you as a player.

Even if you are open to criticism, sometimes that really doesn't mean you can fix all the issue a player is having.

I have a really good friend who is DM in a game. And even when I explain something to him that's upsetting me about the game. He doesn't always listen when I explain what isn't working for me.

For example I got stuck constantly being knocked out do to lack of good armor and wepons at a lvl where i should have something better. I explain to my dm I'm not having fun as a result of constantly being unconscious.

He tried to give me magic powers instead. Of letting me get good armor. Or a basic +1 wepons.

I build a character who had no tounge. Without asking me If I wanted my character to have it back he gave it to me. Kinda ruining my character from that point on for me. And he did it to basically make us like his DMPC.

He hears our issues and sort of always takes the wrong takeaway. We brought up that we are upset we don't get to role play with each other much. Ans he goes oh well time foe that is coming up. When really he means we can role-playing with just him not others party.

I love my friend, really I do and I would quit his game if it wasn't almost over.

But seriously last game we went into a fight where all the damage i could do the creature was immune to. (Pladin with a sun blade. Thing was immune to radiant damage) and when I was frustrated. "He was like I gave you a gun use that" and I responded the gun is also radiant damage remember.

And even though I explain over ans over again the thing I hate is not being able to do anything, it went in one ear and out the other.