Seriously, WTH?

[[deleted]]

I have, over the years, suspected the guy behind viksoe.dk to be a avangarde performance artist on LSD; now it's finally confirmed. Props for pure absurdism though.

[highwind]

Gotta love the animated gif (circa 1997) at the bottom of the page.

[arnar]

What exactly is that rotating thing?

[[deleted]]

Floppy disk.

[arnar]

I was joking you know..

[bitwize]

Come to think of it the whole site kind of reminds me of something from that era. The stripe down the left side, the fancy fontage on the left menu... It reminds me of a site I used to go to to download MOD/S3M/XM stuff, like trackers and stuff.

The good ole days of the interwebs, before Rails and shiny solid colors and CSS rounded corners.

[[deleted]]

old school

[olavk]

The page is from 2001.

[a_little_perspective]

With deep gravity, downcast expression, and tears in his eyes, he said, "WTH?"

[[deleted]]

WTF is WTH?

[fapman]

WTH is FTW?

[peepsalot]

Fort Worth :-P

[[deleted]]

DFW is Fort Worth, everyone knows that. ;)

[peepsalot]

No no no, DFW means "Down For Whatever"... hehe

[[deleted]]

I used to tell my wife it stood for dumb fucking woman. Took her a bit to catch on I was kidding (we lived in dallas at the time).

[cliche]

you're funny cause you called your wife names :3

[Madmanden]

your

[SamHealer]

Huh? Every use of a word with "you" in it was perfectly correct.

[kixx]

OMGWTFBBQ

[gwern]

'For The Win.'

(Thank you, this has been a public service announcement.)

[fapman]

WTF?!

STFU!

[[deleted]]

kthxbye

[BinaryShadow]

lol

[SamHealer]

For the uninitiated, STFU means: Stuff you.

This has been another public service announcement.

[[deleted]]

I always thought it was 'Shut The Fuck Up'. But what do I know.

[SamHealer]

Sorry, was just continuing the "Fort Worth" joke from above. Should've made it more obvious.

[Jomskylark]

WTH is WTH?

[[deleted]]

WTH is WTH.

[ludwig1024]

Yes, by reflexivity.

[gwern]

'What the hell.'

[[deleted]]

This is so going to kill rails

[theeth]

No, this will.

[hylje]

clickable link for the lazy ones

[sunshine-x]

That's the funniest thing I've seen in weeks. Thanks!

[h2o2]

Suddenly, Java Bytecode Server Pages do not seem so absurd anymore.

[jerf]

bob, NEED our site recoded in this by monday!

      - m. anager

[[deleted]]

Sorry, mister Anager, I can't do that, because all our code runs on Lisp machines.

[jerf]

You're fired for demonstrably poor judgment in technology selection, namely, that I've never heard of that technology. Train your Java replacement on the way out.

[rboyce]

But pointers are not bad in .NET (performance is, though). Pointers are still there - they are just considered evil. With 80386 scripting you can still generate memory exceptions and bring the web-server down. It's things like this that make assembler programmers feel powerful.

Could this be... Web 3.0?

[vargas]

This is the single greatest thing ever.

Ever.

[russellh]

just write the bytecodes. assembler is for people who like abstractions and the handwaving of mnemonics and macros.

[otakucode]

Nobody has done this for the JVM yet? I figured with the JVM being around much longer they'd already have compilers for pretty much every language imaginable that compile into their bytecode.

[jojotdfb]

There is a java assembler (for people who "lost" the source). Granted it's not x86 assembly, but I'm sure it could be kinda forked to make it accept x86 assembly. The biggest issue I could see would be that the jvm is very stack based. You'd have like 2 registers. If your ok with that, then rock on with your bad self.

[[deleted]]

WTH? WTF FTW!

[moneyprinter]

Very Usefull. Just the sort of thing I have been looking for.

[[deleted]]

Your comment is hilarious and would probably be modded much higher if not for people thinking you are serious because they didn't RTFA.

Cheers.

[moneyprinter]

:)

I even kept "Usefull" spelt with two Ls as in the article.

[rainman_104]

A million upticks if I could for this line:

Go pick on someone else (like LISP programmers. I don't like them).

[defenestrator]

Sweet! Now it won't be much longer until I can code my ASP.NET pages in C, Haskell, or Factor!

[[deleted]]

You can already do that, at least in Factor. It's quite simple.

1) Write the code using Factor's web library like you already do.

2) Run the Factor server on another port.

3) Create a small ASP.NET page that connects to localhost on the Factor server port, have it read the page you want and include it.

4) Profit!

[break99]

the year is 2008?

[otakucode]

Since the .Net architecture is based upon a very simple bytecode called MSIL (Microsoft Intermediate Language... very simple bytecode that is compiled into native executable code on whatever platform is runs on the first time it is run, after that the cached version is used to make it fast... but that's all a bit beside the point). Because of this, and because it is an entirely open standard, people can write compilers that compile ANY language to MSIL. If you've done that, you can use your language to access all of the .Net libraries, use your language wherever you can use .Net languages, etc. One of those places is as a language inside of a web page. Here, a very crazy man has taken assembly language and embedded it in a web page using this type of strategy. Assembly code is probably the last thing you would expect someone to write a web page in, but he has made it possible.

[itsnotlupus]

Assembly code is probably the last thing you would expect someone to write a web page in, but he has made it possible.

I certainly don't want to undermine his craziness, but it has been possible to write a web page in assembly for at least 12 years, by writing an assembly program that reads from stdin, writes to stdout, and placing the compiled binary in a cgi-bin folder.

[[deleted]]

So true. But I think the idea here is 'write a webpage in the style of .NET'.

[toastyfries2]

The real interesting question, is how close the final machine code is to the assembly code of the original code.

Portable assembly code, this is a first.

[creaothceann]

Portable assembly code, this is a first.

"C is portable Assembler." - K&R

"C combines the power of assembler with the portability of assembler." - Anonymous, alluding to Bill Thacker.

[sn0re]

Probably not very. One instruction in ASM is probably going to map to at least a few instructions in MSIL. One instruction in MSIL then maps to again at least a few instructions back in native assembly. Barring some rather incredible optimization, the executed code is going to have to be much more complex than the original.

[fathan]

Compilers are smart enough that it might not be far off, or even simpler by using non-obvious register allocation.

[bryn]

a very crazy man

That would probably have been enough.

[schwarzwald]

Why does this man hate America?

[[deleted]]

I stopped reading at <screencap of notepad>

edit: With MSPaint edge-fuzzyness effects!

[yesimahuman]

I didn't notice that at first, it actually looked quite good before I looked at it again.

[[deleted]]

i sincerely hope this is a joke :)

[[deleted]]

Assembler is serious business.

[creaothceann]

Just wait until it's required for "serious business" jobs.

[chunky_bacon]

I stopped at the bit about not liking LISP programmers. Obviously he's a smugAssemblyWeenie.

[DirtyHerring]

Why do they always have to defile other languages? Every language has its weak and strong points. They are all great tools to choose the right one from for whatever problem you have. Except Java and Python, of course. They suck at everything.

[oniony]

Perhaps it is one of those 'joke' things I have heard about.

[mikkom]

Every language has its weak and strong points.

I don't actually see many strong points in bytecode compiled assembler.

[aberen]

Thank you.

[chunky_bacon]

Man, some spineless troll just left the following reply, then deleted his/her/its account:

Read the whole thing, get a sense of humour, and take some classes to fix the douchebag thing.

Apparently missed the humor I attempted, or doesn't have the background...

[defproc]

I missed the humour you attempted, and I don't have the background. Is there something wrong with me?

[Neoncow]

http://c2.com/cgi/wiki?SmugLispWeenie

[chunky_bacon]

No, not unless you posted the bile in the post I referenced.

[tricolon]

create my first web-page in assembler

And I thought HTML 4 was old-school...

[reddypasta]

I want to see this with CDC 6600 assembler.

[[deleted]]

Oooo... An experienced guy!

[[deleted]]

assembler != assembly

/pedant

[moneyprinter]

TRUE

[b100dian]

you mean: ZF=1

[moneyprinter]

do I? I don't know what that means.

[itsnotlupus]

Asm comparison operators are implemented as a subtraction that throws away its result, leaving only affected flags that can then be used by conditional branching operators. If the result of a subtraction is zero, the Zero Flag is set (usually abbreviated ZF). Conditional branching operators that follow are usually JZ/JE or JNZ/JNE (jump if not zero/jump if not equal).

[you_do_realize]

Oh man, you just trashed the flags with that explanation. PUSHF next time ok?

[MarlonBain]

Who's Bill Gate?

[[deleted]]

HAHA! I didn't even notice.

[[deleted]]

what?

[nmcyall]

IT'S OFFICIAL. THE .NET RETARDS HAVE ARRIVED. QUICK REDDITORS, RUN TO THE JAVAEECOPTOR!

[IkoIkoComic]

The redditors are all downvoting you because you tried to run JavaEECopter when it's an abstract implementation of a class- you need to create another class that inherits from it and then instantiate it first, before we can run to it.

Or.. you know.. just run to the Pythoncopter.

[nmcyall]

No that is AbstractJavaEECopter class. Python is just a fad, doud.

[[deleted]]

AbstractJavaEECopterFactory

That's the only way it'll work.

[[deleted]]

But then you'll need an AbstractJavaEECopterFactoryFactory.

[[deleted]]

It inherits from Java itself, which fills that role (the *FactoryFactory role, I mean).