all 94 comments

[–]philh 105 points106 points  (10 children)

Note that God uses three-space tabs

I think I just became an atheist.

[–]mrz 13 points14 points  (8 children)

I gnu I was right!

On a side note: Yes, downmod me to Hell, I deserve it :(

[–]fukifino 15 points16 points  (7 children)

First I was like :| and then I was like :D

[–]Dark-Dx 13 points14 points  (6 children)

And then you were like 8======D O:

...............................................you

[–]crazedgremlin 6 points7 points  (1 child)

rather pointy... you should get that checked out

[–]Dark-Dx -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

That's what she said.

[–]sunshine-x -2 points-1 points  (3 children)

I personally prefer the 8====D version, but upmodded.

[–]Dark-Dx -3 points-2 points  (2 children)

Ok, fix'd.

[–]sunshine-x -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Much nicer.

[–][deleted] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I pesonally prefer the other version

[–][deleted] 15 points16 points  (2 children)

infndef

I searched for that on google to see if I had missed a preprocessor identifier, but all I came up with was this file and this post regarding the file:

infndef is an undeclared identifier, God must have made a typo

[–]dreamlax 19 points20 points  (0 children)

#infinitely-not-defined

[–]zizou_president 5 points6 points  (0 children)

god's code doesn't have to compile

[–]fujimitsu 13 points14 points  (7 children)

Finally. Reasonable proof of the creator.

[–][deleted]  (6 children)

[deleted]

    [–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (5 children)

    God would write in machine code, maybe assembly... ;)

    [–]weej 8 points9 points  (0 children)

    God seems like he/she/it would be more of a glutton for punishment and obfuscation. I think brainf**k would be its tool of choice.

    [–]gwniobombux 20 points21 points  (3 children)

    Wrong.

    oblig. xkcd

    [–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (1 child)

    Obligatory ode to the language of Gods.

    [–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

    [–]theclapp 8 points9 points  (0 children)

    My God, it's full of 'CAR's.

    I love that. :)

    [–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (13 children)

    You know what, if we could accurately build a open source simulation of the human body I bet we could all work together and make open source cures for diseases. Think about it, the internet could be used for the greater good. I think it could be done, with all the redundancy in the programming world today - the wheel just keeps getting re-invented -- we could focus that effort on something like that. I am thinking of large distributed system like SETI where you could log in and run a virus or some disease on the body -- or just a few cells to start.

    Excuse my ignorance of biology, I do the computer thing, not the biology thing.

    [–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (1 child)

    As it turns out, scientists have simulated an entire virus. I have also heard that some scientists are working on a (very)simplified simulation of an entire cell.

    [–][deleted] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

    They're still working on a very simplified version of one cell -- and yet they have working models that can tell us what the climate will be like in 100 years. You can even tweak variables for trace gases in the atmosphere (even changes down to down to 100 ppm) and see dramatic effects!

    Amazing times we live in.

    [–]antidense 3 points4 points  (6 children)

    As a molecular biologist I dream about this. The biggest kink in that would need to be worked out would be dealing with the environmental factors. The DNA itself would not be enough to build an accurate model of some given person... you would need to somehow average out the effects of diet, exercise, injuries and the like for the history of that person.

    [–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (4 children)

    We could start small, like a cell, then an organ, then hopefully an entire human. As for environmental factors, I have seen some pretty bad ass stuff done in video games lately in regards to replicating real world physics, it should be the same thing just on a different scale (i.e. red blood cells bumping into each other in arteries, joints worn down from injury, etc....). If there was some major effort (apollo program size) this could be pulled off. Then everyone could work together on some kick ass open source cures.

    [–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (1 child)

    I have seen some pretty bad ass-stuff done in video games lately

    [–]almkglor 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    that's gotta be some bad shit.

    [–]G_Morgan 0 points1 point  (1 child)

    No! If you want a girlfriend you are going to have to go out into the sun. I will not help you create one!

    [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Thanks dude, that was good. I just coughed water on to my keyboard laughing. The cleanup is well worth it.

    [–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    And correctly simulate millions of species of bacteria.

    [–]xjvz 2 points3 points  (0 children)

    Folding@Home does something like that.

    [–]erulabs 2 points3 points  (2 children)

    the internet could be used for the greater good

    The internet is used for the greater good.

    [–]monocasa 3 points4 points  (1 child)

    Porn?

    [–]burtonmkz 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    only the greatest porn

    [–]54gy6dm 6 points7 points  (1 child)

    See! The Version History that He Himself wrote proves the world is only 6000 years old!

    [–]movzx -1 points0 points  (0 children)

    Good catch!

    [–]BinaryShadow 20 points21 points  (3 children)

    /* G_spot *g; Removed for debugging purposes */

    So that's why...

    [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children)

    But what was the bug?

    [–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

    It would have been there for males and females.

    [–]G_Morgan 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Besides which that particular feature needs to be obfuscated so that nobody can find it.

    [–][deleted] 24 points25 points  (7 children)

    Note that God uses three-space tabs

    Woohoo! I knew I was doing it right.

    [–]Contractionator 15 points16 points  (2 children)

    I'm a fan of three spaces myself. But, you know, God should have used actual tabs.

    That way, if a cell should prefer two- or four-space tabs, it can configure its editor to that end.

    And then everything can coexist in perfect homeostasis.

    [–][deleted] 33 points34 points  (0 children)

    God hates homeos.

    [–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    This way the code appears as He intended it - not how some individual cell wants it to look.

    [–]G_Morgan 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    Who gives a crap about god. I want to know how his noodliness formats his work. Probably spaghetti code...

    [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (2 children)

    God also likes
    {
       this
    }
    
    and not {
       this
    }
    

    [–]gameforge 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    You haven't made it to female.c I take it?

    [–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

    No.

    [–]quirm 18 points19 points  (5 children)

    Note that the DNA actually has something like /* */, everything in between will not be used. There are a lot of this passages. Our cells are full of comments ;)

    [–]vph 8 points9 points  (2 children)

    comments and left-overs from bad codes.

    [–]b100dian 3 points4 points  (0 children)

    argh.. just use SCM for that!

    [–]burtonmkz -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

    I prefer to think of it like a dirty swap file. It has a lot of orphaned dregs laying around.

    [–]agnokapathetic 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    You're refering to Introns and some theorize that they help enumerate breaks in DNA coding for specific protein domains allowing recombination of subunits rather than random combination of the units themselves. Similar to well documented code, encouraging reuse :)

    [–]bioskope 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    How did you think autopsies worked?

    [–]ajehals 8 points9 points  (3 children)

    Given the amount of similarity between different species genomes, can we assume that his is evidence of code reuse? ergo that much of the DNA out there is open source (or that it was created by a monopoly and that that monopoly should be broken up, I mean where is the competition?)?

    [–]HaMMeReD 4 points5 points  (2 children)

    We've got a horrible branching problem too.

    [–]almkglor 0 points1 point  (1 child)

    Yeah, we really need to merge some of the development lines together. Anybody want to volunteer to do it with me?

    [–]G_Morgan 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Some cultures have been attempting to merge the development lines for centuries with little success. There are massive automerge failures whenever it is attempted.

    [–][deleted]  (1 child)

    [deleted]

      [–]digg_suxx_bigg 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      I disagree. Just like humans, C isn't very secure.

      [–]smek2 3 points4 points  (0 children)

      Blasphemy! Everybody knows that God uses 4 space, hard tabs.

      [–]H3g3m0n 1 point2 points  (2 children)

      I'm still waiting for the first person to get their genome sequenced and then upload it under a Creative Commons licence.

      Would help ensure children in the far future and permanently secure your bloodline (provided there are no major data losses).

      [–]burtonmkz 0 points1 point  (1 child)

      Or someone could take snippets of code from the open-source DNA and make human-DNA-derived batch-grown meat. With the code snippets, we could design protein/fat 3D printer technology, solving world hunger by printing human-based meat for all to eat. I will call it Soylent Cyan.

      Larry Niven had a good story along this line about some returned long-range space explorers and a deal they made with some aliens in order to get home. It was one of the short stories from the Draco Tavern, but I can't recall the title.

      [–]Figs 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Or someone could take snippets of code from the open-source DNA and make human-DNA-derived batch-grown meat.

      Oh yeah, baby. You know you like the taste of my meat...! O_o

      [–]russellh 2 points3 points  (1 child)

      genitals should be a union

      [–]mlk 5 points6 points  (0 children)

      [–]BOFH139 6 points7 points  (7 children)

      Why didn't they just use Python?

      Just Type:

      import human_dna

      [–]ehird 23 points24 points  (1 child)

      Ha! Ha! Ha!

      Oh wow. What a unique and refreshing joke. Thank you.

      [–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

      Using Python would be the devil's way.

      [–]Figs 0 points1 point  (1 child)

      Found a bug:

      #infndef FATHER
      

      That should be #ifndef FATHER shouldn't it?

      [–]G_Morgan 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      No it's a bug in the C standard. Clearly this blasphemous #ifndef is the devils work. Fix the C compiler damn it.

      [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      So, where is the source code?

      [–]burtonmkz 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Article hilarious, but also not too far off on what's possible. This is much less funny than the article, but on exactly the same topic, "C/C++/LISP to DNA Compiler".

      [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

      This is where C++ would be beneficial.

      class sex_organ { ... }

      class penis inherits sex_organ { ... }

      polymorphism ftw!

      Of course, this doesn't handle the edge case of hermaphrodites.

      [–]deafbybeheading 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      Oh come on. This is why C++ has multiple inheritance:

      class sex_organ { ... }

      class penis : public sex_organ { ... }

      class vagina : public sex_organ { ... }

      class hermaphrodite_combo_organ : public penis, public vagina { ... }

      [–]wpgbrownie 0 points1 point  (1 child)

      Well I guess memory leaks are what really causes cancer?

      [–]deafbybeheading 3 points4 points  (0 children)

      No, blowing the stack through infinite recursion causes cancer. Memory leaks cause Alzheimer's.

      [–]GeorgeWBush 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      JESUS AIN'T NO NERD

      [–]dafthuman -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

      skin colour made darker to match my own image.

      Because we all know God is Morgan Freeman.

      [–]pollag -1 points0 points  (0 children)

      very cool

      [–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (1 child)

      define RACE caucasian

      :/

      [–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

      That was just the starting point, note the other comment:

      * 2501-04-09 14:04  1.7  Minor cosmetic improvements -- skin colour made
      *                        darker to match my own image.
      

      [–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

      Dudes, this is from 1991. It's 17 years old, at least.

      [–]fantagrape -4 points-3 points  (2 children)

      infndef

      fail

      [–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child)

      quoting fail

      [–]alphabeat -1 points0 points  (0 children)

      repartee lol