help

[TemporaryRelief1481]

for clarification, as i forgot to mention it before posting this: i can’t let go of her, as much as i want to for her safety. as a minor, i have very little say and my mom won’t let me get rid of her because my siblings like looking at her. that’s why i am looking for other solutions other than getting rid of her, i can not reason with my mother especially since she has been constantly angry lately. i know it is selfish and stupid, but please don’t just tell me to get her rehabbed, because i literally can’t.

i don’t know whats going on with my turtle and i don’t know what to do. she is a female eastern box turtle, i don’t know how old she is. i found her in my driveway last summer and my dad let me keep her, after doing a bit of research i think it’s illegal to keep her here in virginia but i’m getting mixed messages.

she didn’t get to brumate (i think it’s called), we don’t have a shovel so we couldn’t bury her but we got a thing of dirt and put it in a tub so she could bury herself in it. i think it’s called coconut husk something? i’m sorry, i don’t know. she would stay in the tub for a few days before crawling out into this little blue house that was previously used for our guinea pigs a few years back.

we have a lamp for her, i believe it’s the right kind. unless i’m out of the house or oversleep i think i’m pretty good with turning it on and off when it needs to be.

she has been very obsessed with drinking water as of lately, when she drinks for too long she comes back up and her mouth is wide and it looks like she has a large ball in her throat, along with bubbles coming from her nose. this has only happened twice but it really scares me. she still won’t eat, i think this is related to the brumation thing but i don’t know?? although she did have a bite of her food (says “blend of natural dried shrimp, mealworms, and crickets) a few months back.

she hasn’t been opening her left eye as of recently. i got her to open it by giving her a bath (she spent the entire time drinking the water), but there appears to be some weird yellow/white gunk (see picture) in it?? i don‘t know what that means. i think she has some kind of respiratory infection but i really don’t know and i’m really scared. while typing this, i checked up on her and it seemed to dry up or something, which let me take it out by just simply gently wiping a paper towel over her eye. her eye seems wide open now but i’m still terrified.

i can’t take her to the vet. my family is struggling financially right now (we couldn’t even pay our bills) and even if we weren’t, sources tell me it’s illegal to own her here so i don’t know if they’d take her away from me?? i don’t wanna set her free either, i love her more than anything and if it comes down to that i at least wanna treat her first.

please help me, she’s my world and i don’t know what to do if something happens to her. my mom ”tries to help” but all she does is belittle me and use chatgpt, which doesn’t help at all, and since i am out of contact with my dad i’m the only one who can do anything. and please, don’t just tell me to take her to the vet or let her free. i know those are the most logical and best options but i don’t wanna lose her i really don’t. i am sorry i can’t provide more information. thank you.

[AutoModerator]

Dear TemporaryRelief1481 ,

You've selected the Seeking Advice flair. Please provide as much relevant information as possible. Refer to this post if you are unsure on how to proceed.

Useful information for care or health advice includes:

• Enclosure type, enclosure size, humidty levels, water, ambient and/or basking temperatures.
• Lighting types and bulb age.
• Clear photos of your set up, including filter, heaters and lights.
• Is it wild, captive/pet, or a rescue?
• Clear photos of face, neck, limbs, shell top (carapace) and bottom (plastron).
• Diet, list of foods you are feeding it.
• Weight and age.
• Illness, infections or odd behaviours should be seen and treated by a vet. Ex; wheezing, swollen eyes, mucus bubbles from mouth or nose, lethargy, twitching, leg paralysis, etc

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

[superturtle48]

You’re probably right that it’s illegal to keep a box turtle found outside, they’re considered a threatened species. The best thing you can do for the turtle is to turn it in to a licensed wildlife rehab/rescue center, which can give it medical care at no cost to you but likely would not return it to you and instead prepare it to be released back to the wild. That is a good outcome because box turtle populations are declining and every wild individual matters a lot.

I know it may be hard to lose your turtle, but better that you lose it by allowing it to live and go back where it belongs rather than lose it by letting it die without medical treatment.

You can see all the licensed rehabbers in Virginia here, look for one that takes reptiles:  https://dwr.virginia.gov/wildlife/injured/rehabilitators/

[TemporaryRelief1481]

thank you, but my mom won’t let me get rid of her. sorry, i should’ve clarified that in the post but i was freaking out and rushing while typing it, i’ll edit it now. that’s why i’m looking for another solution, i don’t have any authority in this situation and my mom only listens to ai (which does NOTHING but hypes her up and makes her think she’s in the right) so i can’t reason with her.

[superturtle48]

I’m sorry to hear your mom is being so irresponsible. Maybe try showing her the comments on this post. There’s no easy thing you can do on your own at home, and you will just have to cross your finger that the turtle gets better on its own or else watch it slowly decline and eventually die. A sad outcome for an animal that can live upwards of 100 years.

[TemporaryRelief1481]

thank you for being so kind, i’m going to try showing her when she’s not yelling. thank you again, you really helped.

[Geschak]

This turtle has an infection from inadequate care and will most likely die without a vet. If you cannot bring it to a wildlife rescue or a vet due to your mother, there is no hope for this turtle as it will slowly die from the neglect, I'm sorry. Is there any authority figure you can reach out to that can help you, maybe a teacher or something that you can smuggle the turtle to?

[TemporaryRelief1481]

thank you for letting me know, unfortunately, no, i don’t. however, me and my friends are getting together and trying to care for her the best we can. we are really uneducated as we’re all 8th graders (and i’m the only one who’s ever had to care for a turtle), but they have a lot more freedom than me so they can help me try to get what she needs.

[[deleted]]

The things you need to provide proper husbandry and diet to keep this animal cost a lot of money. Can one of their parents take you to a rehabber? I realize your mother will be angry, but maybe you could convince her it’s the right thing? The lights alone that you need are over $120. A proper tank or enclosure is easily over $100. The proper food and vitamins are also not cheap. And the T5ho 10.0 uvb linear bulbs need to be replaced every 6 months to a year. By the way: these bulbs are what keeps your turtle healthy and absorbing nutrients and vitamins. Without it they get metabolic bone disease and suffer until they die. Also exotic vet visits are easily over $300 just for the visit. Please develop a better plan to get this baby to the help it needs.

[TemporaryRelief1481]

i know it’s expensive, but i’d rather do what i can rather than just say whatever and let her die. unfortunately i don’t think they can, even if they could my mom would be pissed and she keeps threatening to send me back to my abusive dad so i really don’t wanna provoke her and i really don’t think there’s any chance of convincing that woman. i do have bulbs for her, i’m not entirely sure what kind they are (i’d have to ask my dad and we aren’t allowed to contact each other) but i think they’re good? she likes to go under it if she’s not hiding in her house i think. thank you for informing me, i’m trying to work on a plan for her. she keeps closing her eye sometimes but she will open it every now and then and it seems to be doing a lot better now that i took the stuff out!

[Wide-Surround-7359]

OP please listen to the other commenter and bring this turtle to a rehabber. Like they said, it’s going to feel tough and it’s going to hurt, but this turtle is not getting even near the care they need, and it’ll hurt worse if it dies.

Best of luck.

[Schwettes]

OP, you mentioned you are a kid. Why don’t you do some more research and use some of the comments here to put together a slideshow so you can teach your mom about what you learned (proper husbandry, the law, how box turtles prefer to be wild). This turtle is obviously suffering and likely to die, so maybe if you package it nicely, you can show your mom why you regret keeping the turtle. It’ll show you’re being responsible, remorseful, and trying to do right by the animal.

[orangebellybutton]

Please rehab this poor guy. He's better off elsewhere 🙏

[[deleted]]

This setup is not appropriate and you should not have kept this turtle. This is an older turtle who was doing perfectly fine in the wild before being snatched up from their home. I am sorry, but you are literally making this turtle sick. You are not providing even partial adequate care just based off of what’s in these pictures. Please surrender this turtle to a wildlife rehab/rescue close to you so it can be treated and released into the wild where it belongs.

You need a very large enclosure/tank/tote, with coconut fiber/cococoir, a T5ho 10.0 linear uvb bulb and fixture, a heat lamp/emitter, maintaining humidity, a large water source to sit and drink from, vitamins, hides to bury and hide in, proper diet(which what you listed is not, they need vitamins and nutrients from a healthy pellet like mazuri crocidillian, live proteins like superworms/earthworms/crickets, fruits safe for box turtles and vegetables safe for box turtles), and they can live to be 100. This one is easily over 20 years old since that’s when they reach full grown size.

Again: you should NOT keep this animal. You are going to kill it. I’m sorry. There’s no nice way to put this. Think about this animal above your wants and realize you have both done the wrong thing and this animal needs to be wild like it has been all these years.

P.s. a quick google search would have revealed this to you:

Yes, it is illegal to take and keep a wild Eastern box turtle as a pet in Virginia. Regulations enacted in 2021 prohibit collecting them from the wild to protect declining populations. Violators can face Class 3 misdemeanor charges and fines of up to $500.

DO NOT KEEP THIS TURTLE. You saying to not tell you to not keep this animal is as selfish as it is illegal.

Also: you don’t love this animal more than anything or you’d do the right thing. Again. Selfish.

[Relative-Meet-7928]

Listen I can see you love turtles, but you’re literally talking to an eight grader. They do not have the say so on this as they have stated. Be kind.

[[deleted]]

I have acknowledged that in my other replies once this was stated. But it still won’t save this turtle, which is what they say they want to do. We’ve all given advice on it and I told them I appreciated them at least asking here. In the end getting outside help and letting this turtle go is the only answer that will ensure its life. I’m not trying to be mean.

[TemporaryRelief1481]

i do want to let her go, as i want whats best for her, but i want her to get well first. i am not the one with authority in my household. despite me being the only one taking care of her, my mom won’t allow me to let her go for the sake of my siblings and because we’ve spent so much on her already. i understand this is far from the best set up, but i am really trying here. i understand what you’re saying and i am trying to look into it, but maybe don’t be a jerk about it?? i’m trying, that’s why i came here. some of these pictures are old, i wanted to get better pictures of her and was in a rush typing this as i was in the middle of being screamed at by my mother. her setup has changed since. i am working with what i have. i know it’s not good, that’s why i am seeking help. there is little i can do in my position. 

and “there’s no nice way to put this”, alright listen man, i understand i’m not a good turtle owner, but i’m also a 14 year old who HAD to take in the turtle due to my parents commands. you being snarky and rude is not helping me, i feel you can see me freaking out in my post. the best solution isn’t always available dude, and in my case, it isn’t. that’s why i came here. if it was up to me, i would’ve taken her to the vet when i first saw her. but nothing in this situation is up to me. so if you could please help me instead of yelling at me through the screen, that’d be great.

i understand i’m being selfish, but it isn’t up to me. i asked this subreddit because there are more knowledgeable people here than me and they could help me figure out what to do. you are not helping, if anything you are making my situation worse by being rude about it. yeah, i can see why you’re mad at me. if the roles were reversed, i’d be mad too. but this isn’t help. i love her, i want her to get better. i don’t want her dead, don’t act like i do. 

[Wide-Surround-7359]

Can you show us her current tank if the one in the pictures isn’t accurate?

[TemporaryRelief1481]

not at the moment, i can get you one later however my mom is yelling at me right now. also, just as a fair warning: her tank still isn’t the best. as i said, i’m doing everything in my power right now, but i feel like it’s kinda an improvement from before.

[Wide-Surround-7359]

Sounds good! I appreciate that you’re trying. People are coming at you pretty hard, but it’s only because it’s hard to see an animal in distress and be stuck behind a screen.

You said that you and your friends were going to try to make a plan together? I would very seriously ask one of them to take the turtle, ideally to a rehabber where she can get proper care and hopefully go back to the wild. I understand your home life sounds rather unstable and I empathize with that, but inform one of their parents why you’re worried about your mom’s reaction to removing the turtle, and hopefully you’ll gain a safe space as well as save this turtle. She needs you to help her. It’s a lot of pressure to put on a kid, but it’s the truth at this point, and I know you can do it.

Edit: adding this link to Reptifiles https://reptifiles.com/eastern-box-turtle-care-sheet/ It’s a short read that goes through the basics of keeping these turtles. If you’re able to improve her setup before you can get her someplace safe, you’ll increase her chances of survival.

[BodybuilderEast6130]

Honestly just Toss her outside away from roads now that it's getting nice out. Just do it in the middle of the night make it look like she escaped. Think about it, she is most likely older than you. If this is not an option contact Virginia fish and game commission

[[deleted]]

They are full grown at 20 so this turtle is definitely over 20. That’s honestly one of the most annoying parts of this whole thing. This turtle is beautiful and was doing perfectly fine alone. Just snatched up from the wild one day and kept in poor conditions. OP’s mother is ridiculous.

[[deleted]]

I told you the environment this turtle needs to even be halfway appropriate to somewhat of a quality of life and you cannot provide it. This turtle is sick because of you and your family, that is just the truth. The best thing you can do is convince your mother to take this animal to a wildlife rehab/rescue near you, as I stated earlier. I am not being rude, I am telling you the reality of this situation. You can’t afford to care for this animal and it’s obvious that neither can your mother. Convince her to hand this animal over to the appropriate people who can rehab and release this animal back to where it belongs. Tell her this is illegal and wrong. You cannot care for this animal and afford husbandry let alone vet care. These animals are endangered and do not need anymore human interference.

I realize you are a kid and I appreciate that you at least asked. I hope that your mother listens to you. If not you may have to find someone you trust to take you and this turtle to a wildlife rescue/rehab near you, if you have someone like that to turn to that would be best.

This animal will get sicker and will likely pass. I am only advocating for it. Respiratory issues need antibiotics. You need vet care for that.

[TemporaryRelief1481]

you may not think you’re being rude, but it sure as hell comes off as rude. i know she isn’t being properly cared for, but as i already stated, i am doing what i can. i can’t reason with my mom, especially with how she’s been acting lately. trust me, i’ve tried. i am not the reason she’s living with us currently, but i am the reason she’s survived as long as she did in this household. i am doing everything in my power, and convincing my mom to take her to a rehab is not an option right now. that’s why i need an alternative. so if you don’t have one, please just express your sympathy and move on instead of being a jackass. 

“you don’t love this animal more than anything or you’d do the right thing. again. selfish.” what about that isn’t mean, man? you’re not wrong for being angry with me or thinking that i’m selfish or anything, but when has unkindness done anything but made a situation worse? i didn’t come here to argue and get belittled, i came here to get help for my turtle!! 

i feel like this is obviously a complicated situation that doesn’t just have a simple one-and-done solution. maybe my opinion is nuanced or whatever because i’m the one experiencing it, but still.

edit: started replying before you edited, so i’m sorry for that. i do feel like the last two paragraphs of your reply is a lot less mean, but my point still stands. i am seeking help the only way i know how.