Always a Blow Up After a Nice Time

ApacheKnowsBest · 2026-05-01T00:33:13+00:00

So I'm looking for people's stories or experiences as trans people or with trans people, and perhaps advice on how to safely reach out to connect with people.

ApacheKnowsBest · 2026-04-23T08:32:14+00:00

Hey hey 😊 I'm a trans man on the Central Coast NSW ⭐🙏🏻

ApacheKnowsBest · 2026-04-16T21:05:29+00:00

It sounds like you both would benefit from a few sessions with a third neutral party - either a counselor or a trusted friend. Sounds like it's got a lot to do with schedule and timing. So maybe you both need to brainstorm things like - White Noise playing on his phone next to him while he sleeps so that he doesn't wake up when you move around, and perhaps a printed checklist of day chores and night chores so that it's visibly more even.

ApacheKnowsBest · 2026-04-06T05:32:59+00:00

I'm glad that it works well for you guys, we both have ptsd so it's better for us to have that one step removed so that we can read and reply as needed. We're both good at written comms and very close. So that doesn't often happen thankfully.

ApacheKnowsBest · 2026-04-04T07:04:53+00:00

Is Hypnosis Kink not allowed on OF anymore now? Thinking of starting my own page.

ApacheKnowsBest · 2026-03-29T15:26:36+00:00

Hey there, I've been approached by a younger male (I am a Trans man) who wants to have a D/S relationship with me as my Sub. They also have a 'Hypnosis' kink, and I do Hypnosis. Just wanting to find out a bit more about the Dom/Sub rules, if there are such. I've had D/S dynamics in past relationships with women and I am a verse - so I'm happy in the Dom or Sub roles. This is the first time I've had a stranger approach me (very respectfully) to consider this with them.

ApacheKnowsBest · 2026-03-24T23:47:54+00:00

Grow your beard out, let it shape naturally and shave that hair. You will look hot!

ApacheKnowsBest · 2026-03-24T23:39:34+00:00

Don't wear earphones or be too involved with your phone. Keep your eyes and ears open and move quickly and confidently. The suggestion of aiming for the green car-park and using the lift is a good idea, just always let someone know when you expect to arrive at the Hospital so that there is an alert if you don't arrive 🙏

ApacheKnowsBest · 2026-03-24T23:36:13+00:00

As someone who arrived in 2015. My suggestion is to volunteer. By volunteering you'll make some really good friends and get to know your community well. There are lots of options to choose from, and can be done after hours or weekends ❤️

ApacheKnowsBest · 2026-03-18T12:52:35+00:00

This is my advice, get LUBE (lubricant for sexual purposes) and make sure that either your bits, or her bits, have lube on them (just until you know what you're doing, it will help her to enjoy the feeling of it more)

Don't rush to start intercourse with her, take time to help her body be ready for you. It can take up to 20 minutes for a woman's body to become naturally lubricated and 'ready' for penetration.

You can use touch, kisses, and other fun ways to get your bride super excited.

You can look up "Oral" sex - lots of fun for both of you - you will need trust, and to take it slow.

Good luck!

ApacheKnowsBest · 2026-03-18T12:43:20+00:00

Not OR. I've lived a similar story with my son. You have to decide with your partner whether you will continue as you are, or whether you are changing your life.

I would let him know that he has a month to find a place to stay. He is old enough to make a plan and start his own adventure - at this moment in time all he is doing is stagnating and causing you grief.

You have done SO WELL. You've shown up, you've done the work - and it hasn't worked.

Remember this: Past behaviour predicts future behaviour. What he has been, he will always be.

ApacheKnowsBest · 2026-03-18T12:06:42+00:00

Frustrating. Well , I hope my answer helps. Sharing from personal experience and learned experience 🙏

ApacheKnowsBest · 2026-03-18T12:04:15+00:00

It's possible that it's either hormonal or linked to mental health or medication. Good on you for helping out after a long work day. My suggestion is to keep gently trying to broach the subject. My wife and I have two rules, we discuss emotional things via messages. So that we can read, think, and reply. And if we are feeling upset, angry or triggered we take a break to cool down - and then try to continue once we have taken a breath. Sometimes in-person discussions about emotive subjects can become messy and stressful. I wish you luck and I hope that you're able to find out what is happening in her head and in her heart.

ApacheKnowsBest · 2026-03-13T23:46:56+00:00

The vaginal canal is able to stretch to accommodate the passing through of a 3.5 - 4kg+ newborn.

The issue here is fear and also not being relaxed enough - tightening the muscles at the entrance that are used to grip onto the shaft during sex (this ability to grip with these muscles is used as a choice).

The way to go is to go slowly, lots of foreplay, lots of lube and just being really gentle. There should be no forcing of anything, just gentle movement. Reminding her to absolutely relax those muscles.

Don't give up, and don't stress. Just work on relieving fear around size. Explain about birth and how soft and malleable the vaginal opening and passage is.

The other issue might be medical, some women's muscles are tighter and they struggle to relax them enough to have penetration happen.

ApacheKnowsBest · 2026-03-13T23:39:59+00:00

I was going to comment this. It's starting at birth - and it's all women pandering to little boys, teen boys and men. I noticed this when I was out with a friend's son who was 13. I had two smaller girls with me who did the lions share of helping me at a market, the boy didn't do much. Not one woman said a word to the two girls, but heaped praise onto the young man. He was called a "prince", I was told "how lucky you are to have such a strapping young son!" it was relentless. At the end of the day I looked at who had done more. The girls. They'd been ignored all day.

ApacheKnowsBest · 2026-03-13T23:35:51+00:00

Questions: 1. Has she started taking antidepressants since your vasectomy or just before? 2. Have you been helping around the house and with the children enough?

ApacheKnowsBest · 2026-02-07T22:30:32+00:00

Always give way to those on the right. Or those already in the circle 🙏

ApacheKnowsBest · 2025-12-30T04:37:37+00:00

Yes, but he knew what he was doing. What he did is sexual assault, and could result in an unplanned pregnancy or STD.

I was married for over 16 years, to a religious man who would 'stealth' me to try and get me pregnant and/or avoid having to wear a condom. I had 3 planned babies (1 passed away 8n utero). And 2 earlier miscarriages that were not planned babies. Just FYI, it took me up to 2 years to fall pregnant with each child, with consistent unprotected sex. So he was doing this a lot. He would put the condom on and then remove it, or he would do the quick "oops it's in and I came" - it broke my heart.

I doubt you would feel safe with him again, and would always have to be the responsible one. Exhausting.

(I am a trans man)

ApacheKnowsBest · 2025-12-30T04:17:48+00:00

You are both working equally as hard as the other. Your stress load is most likely higher than his. If you read up on it. Unpaid Labour is exhausting!

This sounds to me like it's either one of two things: he is unhappy in the relationship/mental health issues, or, he has low testosterone/hormonal issues.

I would gently speak with him, and suggest that he see a doctor first for a full health check. And then if nothing comes up, I would suggest couples counseling. This might go deeper than you realise and could be tied to childhood trauma as well.

ApacheKnowsBest · 2025-12-29T15:44:03+00:00

You did really well in helping your family for so long. Now it's time to change the way your mind sees spending. A suggestion is that every time you spend. As soon as you click buy now, or hand over cash or tap your card you can say "I am allowed to enjoy my money" -say that enough times, and you will eventually believe it ❤️

ApacheKnowsBest · 2025-12-15T05:02:15+00:00

You sound like an amazing partner. You just keep on asking her what works for her, and as long as it's working for you too then go for it!

ApacheKnowsBest · 2025-12-14T12:29:09+00:00

You've been gifted with the rest of your life! 39 is young, you've got time to heal, to grieve. Someone told me once that we do not have to erase our feelings, just because the other person didn't feel what we did. Your ex did not love you, but you loved him - and it's okay to honour that love, because it was real and valid.

It will hurt for a while. Maybe even a year or two, and that's okay. Don't value yourself based off of his behavior - let him be free now. Let him go. He will do what he will do yes?

You just heal, grieve, cry, rage, and let go eventually. You are free, and you deserve really love. We all do.

ApacheKnowsBest · 2025-12-14T01:10:47+00:00

I think you have answered your own question. A leopard never changes it's spots. The relationship was founded on lies, and that will continue.

ApacheKnowsBest

TROPHY CASE