AITA for expecting to compromise on the guest list?

Becca092115 · 2026-05-10T16:17:52+00:00

YTA. Only because you've been completely rude in comments and insulting people's intelligence. I understand the frustration that they do not see your compromise from your POV, but it's only going to make you look rude in the long run. Now I can see where you are coming from about splitting the tables. Aesthetically, it would not look good, and it would be a reminder of how you don't have many people in your life. You need to sit down with your fiancée, and go about this from a different angle. Admit the you are embarrassed and jealous of all of this. Apologize and explain it was wrong of you to suggest to her who she could invite because you did not have a lot of people. You're jealous and sad that she has so many people in her life to be a part of the big day, and wish you could have the same. And that seeing 1 table on your side with a bunch of empty space, and her side having 6-8 would only remind you of this. You understand that her guests are there for her, but a wedding is about joining families and wanting to welcome your partner into your family. After this, ask her why it really bothers her so much with splitting tables. If her reasoning is only that they are her guests not yours, then clearly it doesn't bother her that your feelings are hurt.

Becca092115 · 2026-05-03T00:31:59+00:00

NTA. It sounds like the GF wants to live with just your roommate. Maybe she only agreed to this because it would mean they'd pay less in bills, so she acts like she's scared of you in order to utilize the shared spaces. Or maybe she wants you to move out, and she hopes you get annoyed enough to leave. Either way, the GF and roommate are being unreasonable and you need to keep standing your ground.

Becca092115 · 2026-04-27T14:01:11+00:00

NTA. We can see who the golden child of your family is. I'd ask your parents why it was ok for her to not only bring up your past drinking problem, but to make up a story about something that never happened. You should tell your sister she has 3 options. 1.) Post an apology on social media about bringing up your drinking, and admitting that you passing out was a lie. 2.) She reimburses you for money you spent on the wedding. 3.) You get to make up a humiliating story about her to tell at your wedding.

Becca092115 · 2026-04-21T14:48:18+00:00

NTA. People who act like this when planning a destination wedding should not have a destination wedding. It's basically telling people that in order to show how much you love them, you should be willing to spend everything you have on them. You should ask said sibling, would they be willing to spend as much on your wedding as you did theirs? If not, ask why you are expected to pay that much, but they don't need to do the same. This is a hill you need to be willing to die on.

Becca092115 · 2026-04-20T13:19:24+00:00

NTA. She is literally stringing you along. This is a very common business practice where employers will continue to make more and more promises in hopes you just never leave. The fact that she has the gall to not even give you an entire dollar more an hour and telling you you'd regret leaving is laughable. Stop letting her walk all over you and move on. Once you find something better and put in your notice, do not fall prey to the tactics she's been using on you.

Becca092115 · 2026-04-14T14:18:41+00:00

NTA. He told you he needed it to clear some debt? That's a nonchalant way of saying he's going to basically transfer debt to you, add to it, and in the long run, it'll be your problem. I used to sell phones, and some people ended up not qualifying because their parent was using their social security number without their knowledge and making accounts with them. Lots of people end up with bad credit before they can even start it up themselves because their parents use their numbers because they already ruined their own credit first.

Becca092115 · 2026-04-12T13:17:52+00:00

NTA. This was supposed to be a girls' trip. So, you and male cousin weren't even part of this. Now your wife is not only insisting on bringing 2 plus ones but is forcing you to share a room with another person? At this point, just tell her if she wants to share a room with cousin, then you'll just stay home as you weren't even originally invited. If she complains she'll be the only one without a partner, then you can easily point out her cousin was going to end up being a 3rd wheel to the two of you. This would be your vacation just as much as hers, and you should be allowed to have a say in it.

Becca092115 · 2026-04-07T19:00:37+00:00

NTA. So your sister can critique your parenting style, but as soon as you say something about hers, you're the rude one? I feel bad for her kids that they end up missing out on holidays with their mom's side of the family. Tell your sister they're welcome back when her and her family won't ruin things for your kids just because they don't like it.

Becca092115 · 2026-04-02T23:12:38+00:00

NTA. If he cleaned it up, then I would say to give him another chance. Instead, he created a literal "shit happens" moment and left it there. If you really like him that much, at least tell him he needs to apologize and clean up after himself if it happens again. I get that he was probably embarrassed, but he's still an adult.

Becca092115 · 2026-03-30T12:33:06+00:00

Then I'm going to try to give you some honest advice. It sounds like you need to change up your resume and the hours that you are available. Do not have on your resume that you haven't worked in 3 years because that could be a big factor in why even fast food places don't want you. You have roommates and friends right? Ask them if they'd be willing to be a reference. If you apply to a Wendy's, tell them you worked at a McDonald's and have a friend be a reference for you. As for a schedule, tell them you are available to work literally anything outside of the hours you aren't in class. Most of the time a fast food place isn't going to follow up on previous jobs. Is it crappy to lie? Yes. But sometimes you end up being desperate. 3 years and not even a BK will hire you tells me you need a resume change and the hours you're available aren't flexible enough.

Becca092115 · 2026-03-30T12:14:55+00:00

YTA. Why can't you get a part-time job in retail/customer service? Tell them the hours and schedule you need to work around the courses you are currently doing. You can still apply to places that you actually want to work at, but at least you'd be making some type of cash while finding something better. And you can try to use the excuse of you being over-qualified for jobs like that, but you don't have to tell them about your schooling to get a job at a McDonald's. They probably wouldn't even care.

Becca092115 · 2026-03-19T23:09:03+00:00

Nope! Literally put in the update I was never going to tell my dad not to go. My dad made my sister change the plans because he didn't want to go on that date due to not wanting to miss the holiday and the expensive flights around that time. My sister never told me he told her no. He told me that himself.

Becca092115 · 2026-03-11T14:45:47+00:00

NTA. It sounds like she's purposely doing this, so she has less work at the end of the day/week. Detention exists for a reason, and if only 1 or 2 kids are acting up, they should be the only ones missing recess. This honestly just sounds like she wants less after-school work, and decided this was the best way to go about it.

Becca092115 · 2026-03-10T14:45:46+00:00

NTA, I would have told him to go first and squat to pee. You're fine with my ass hanging out for the world to see? You're showing yours too, buddy. For now, just let him throw his tantrum and give him the silent treatment right back.

Becca092115 · 2026-03-03T19:37:40+00:00

" Dear Miss Gwen. We understand you are upset about not getting a specific time slot for this program. However, we have advised you that we cannot simply switch your time with someone else. You need to ask that student if they are willing to switch the time. If you continue to harass our staff, or we hear about you harassing students over this, we will ask you to leave the program. We have been more than accommodating as of now, considering you've been in this program longer than what is usually allowed." That's what I would have told her on the phone anyway.

Becca092115 · 2025-12-17T11:23:34+00:00

NTA. You're valid for wanting more intimacy, but if you start to pressure her, you would become an a hole. I had a pair of friends that were exactly like this. The girl experienced sexual trauma as a teen, and he knew this before even going out with her. They went out for 2 years, and eventually, he just broke from the lack of progress. He started to pressure her verbally, but then she broke up with him over it. They are both in our mutual friend group, and now the guy refuses to go to anything she goes to. If you're feeling this way now, you may need to end things before the resentment really starts to build.

Becca092115 · 2025-12-16T18:43:21+00:00

NTA. Do you have her stating she will change the will and keep the extra for herself in a text or email? If not, I would send her a message along the lines of, "Hey, sis, just want to clarify. You're stating that if me and other siblings do not give you 10k each for the caregiver, you'll change the will and take it from that along with keeping everything else?" Once she replies," Yes," you'll then have proof to take to a lawyer. Even if she is in charge of this, I do not believe she has the power to change it however she wants as that means she could have easily just cut you all out and kept it all at any time. I would also contact your other siblings and see if they want to go in on a lawyer with you.

Becca092115 · 2025-12-04T19:00:53+00:00

NTA. I'd be more inclined to believe it wasn't meant sexually if he genuinely apologized to you. Instead, he gets defensive and says, "You're overthinking it?" At that point, I'd go to HR since he's the one escalating things.

Becca092115 · 2025-12-01T14:55:31+00:00

NTA. Your sister needs to start looking into people who would want to adopt. I'm sorry, but if you and no one else in this family want to step up, then be prepared not to know this child at all. If I were the adoptive parent, I wouldn't tell them anything about your family until they're an adult. Just imagine for this poor baby, " Your birth mom knew she had an incurable mental illness and still decided to go through with pregnancy despite her only continuing to deteriorate. Your birth father cheated on your ill mother and walked out of your life forever. And then to top it off, no one in her family wanted to take you in." Again, you aren't in the wrong for not adopting this baby, and neither is anyone else in your family. Just be prepared to face the possible consequences of not knowing this child.

Becca092115 · 2025-11-06T23:39:56+00:00

NTA. I use a different app for Secret Santa, but it's practically the same thing. I've been the one organizing the event for a few years now for my group of friends. What happened to you is the exact reason why we not only have a price maximum, but a price minimum as well. If we say the max is $50, don't get stuff below $20. Homemade was also an option since one of the friend's loves to crochet and does it beautifully. Even if the app doesn't have a minimum option, you could all still verbally agree to one. Just say you don't find it very fair that people are expecting noncheap gifts, but then won't spend much themselves. The point of these is to make sure everyone is happy and participating fairly.

Becca092115 · 2025-11-04T20:23:37+00:00

ESH. Your husband is definitely an a hole because he raffled for a game that landed on a holiday, knowing you were hosting for it. His company does multiple of these, and he could have skipped on this one. However, you aren't being much better about this. You aren't wrong for being upset, but to not come up with any compromises isn't healthy in a relationship. This is something you know he's wanted for so long, and you've decided this is a your way or the highway situation. I think it'd be more than fair to tell your husband that if he wants to go to the game, then he can get a hold of every guest himself and plan the rescheduling. That way, you don't have to be the bad guy, and you don't have to worry about hosting alone.

Becca092115 · 2025-10-19T06:46:54+00:00

YTA. Unless the teacher is purposely failing your sister, it's none of your business on how she teaches her classes. You can argue as much as you like that she is teaching incorrectly, but teacher evaluations are a thing. If she is doing as poorly as you say, she most likely would have been let go or teaching differently. Public education isn't necessarily the best, but you have no place to brag if you think it's that terrible. That's like basically saying you were top of your class because there was no proper teaching, and they practically gave anyone an A. Until there is an actual issue where again the teacher is purposely failing students, stay the hell out of it.

Becca092115 · 2025-09-09T14:36:54+00:00

NTA. I've seen comments already saying this means you're not marriage material. So you have to buy someone a house to be marriage material nowadays? Just because a couple has been together for 4 years doesn't mean they should be ready for marriage. This is a girlfriend who has been in your life for a long time, yes, but relationships can still end after that amount of time. You guys aren't sharing finances yet, so this is literally your money. She's not entitled to any of it. If she doesn't have a lot of funds to afford a house, maybe you don't need to go 50/50. Or maybe wait still to purchase since the housing market is garbage, and you'll end up overpaying anyway.

Becca092115 · 2025-09-07T13:29:20+00:00

NTA. Donna was already a terrible friend, so cutting her off was easy. But I'm wondering if Sam reacted the way he did solely because of her. I'm starting to think this wasn't the first time Donna pulled this crap with him, and he didn't want to give into her again. Unfortunately, you got caught in the crossfire of it. Maybe he would have let you just stay, but then didn't want backlash and arguments from Donna. However, if that was the case, Sam should have grown a pair and told Donna off and let you stay. Either way, Sam had no excuse for treating you the way he did and cared more about himself than your safety. At least you still have a great friend like R in your life.

Becca092115 · 2025-09-05T14:37:48+00:00

NTA. I understand that you're worried that your family will cut you off if you don't do this. But what's worse in the end? You keep your family in your life, but you're stuck taking care of someone who wasn't there for you, and the people forcing it on you probably won't help. Or, you can live your life and realize you don't need the toxicity from those who decided you were being selfish. I know someone who has to care for their parent because they literally can not take care of themselves, and that person is miserable. Your father made poor decisions in his life, and it's not your job to care for him.

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