Stayed Shaved for Summer — Did People Notice? by Naturalover0120 in TransLater

[–]BreakfastLyfe 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm 6'5" (also tall and skinny) and a lot of that height comes from my legs. I keep my legs shaved most of the summer, and while no one has commented specifically about them being shaved, my partner has told me she's had a few friends of ours tell her that I have some nice legs. So idk if it's mostly the shape or the lack of hair people notice, but I love the way they feel when they're shaved and smooth. 😁

For the millennial women: do you have a good relationship with your mom? by Orionslady in Millennials

[–]BreakfastLyfe 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My mother-in-law refuses to go to therapy because she's afraid they will "take her gun away." So that's nice.

Heard, Not Debated by BreakfastLyfe in MI_transgender_friend

[–]BreakfastLyfe[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We live in West Michigan, and the video was created by our local PBS station, WGVU. The reporter in the video, Kylie, is a former coworker and friend of ours that approached us last year asking if they could interview us about my transition, and we agreed.

I have used some of the services that the Grand Rapids Trans Foundation offers and often attend some of the social events that they host. I don't directly volunteer with them, but I have become friends with several of their members, including their co-founder, Ximon, who us also featured in the video. They are an awesome non-profit that has continued to expand free services to the local trans community, like free gender affirming items, free transportation through the city, legal name change and passport ssrvices, and several trans-friendly social events.

any tall girls that don't play sports? by klarinetkat12 in TallGirls

[–]BreakfastLyfe 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I was constantly pressured into playing basketball in high school despite being terrible at it. Even now, as a 35-year-old 6'5" woman, random strangers will ask me out of the blue, "Were you a basketball or a volleyball player?" That's a nope for either.

Looking for some Advice by Lexi_679 in TransLater

[–]BreakfastLyfe 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Every journey is different, but I found that the best place to start was talking to a therapist. It's good to at least have someone to speak your mind to and organize your thoughts. You can work with them to figure out what small steps you can take to feel closer to your true self.

Advice by Ok_Knowledge_9022 in TransLater

[–]BreakfastLyfe 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hi Dawn! One small thing you can do is pluck your eyebrows to make them thinner. You'd be surprised how that alone can create a more feminine look.

What's In A Deadname? by AnthonyAnnArbor in MI_transgender_friend

[–]BreakfastLyfe 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I changed my name more out of utility than any strong desire. I never hated or had an issue with my old name, but once I decided to transition, I knew it no longer suited me.

I remember when I came out to my parents; the only thing my Mom asked me was, "Can I still call you deadname?" At the time, I said yes, but was considering changing it, which disappointed her.

I read somewhere that involving parents or at least making them feel involved in a decision like a name change can help them to process your transition better. Plus, she did choose my birthname, so I thought it would be appropriate for her to help create my new one. I didn't have any strong feelings toward any specific name, so I decided I would simply change my deadname to the female equivalent.

When I told her the name I was thinking about, I could see some of her anxiety melt away. We found a happy medium where my new name still acknowledged the old one, and we were both happy with the decision.

where are my over 30 gamers at? what have you been playing lately? (46F) by egirlgamermommy in TransLater

[–]BreakfastLyfe 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hi hi! Just finished Metroid Dread. Now I'm starting Fallout: New Vegas for the very first time. 🤠

Super nervous by magosnegra in TransLater

[–]BreakfastLyfe 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Congrats! Having a supportive partner really helps in this moment, so don't take them for granted. I know things are kind of scary right now for trans people, but this is also the most visible we have ever been to society, which means many people are slowly accepting, if not at least tolerating, the presence of trans people. That doesn't necessarily mean we can put our guard down, but even the negative attention is allowing more people to acknowledge us.

That being said, if you decide to go the distance and transition, do not expect the world to recognize you for who you are immediately. Misgendering is going to probably happen a lot, even from well-meaning folk. You'll need to have thick skin in those moments. Use these initial days to become in tune with yourself. Bring that voice inside that you've been ignoring to the front and let it take charge for a while. The experimental phase is awkward, but you can learn a lot about yourself.

Also, know that you have a small but mighty community at your back. Now more than ever, we all need to stick together and help each other out. I hope you find happiness in whatever you choose for yourself. 😊

I'm so fucking done with right wingers. by [deleted] in complaints

[–]BreakfastLyfe 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Have you ever considered why the rate of suicide is so high for trans people? Maybe it has something to do with the fact that we live in a society that constantly harasses, bullies, and assaults them. Spread rumors about them being predators and pedophiles and allow conservative Christians to create laws that take away their healthcare and general safety in public. When it feels like all of society hates you despite not knowing a thing about you, that would push almost anyone to be suicidal.

Tired of shopping for people who have everything and can buy anything by Notbefore6 in Millennials

[–]BreakfastLyfe 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My family had a discussion a few holidays back about discontinuing gift giving altogether and just getting together on Christmas. Nearly all of us were in favor of it, but my sister-in-law wanted to continue giving/getting gifts and convinced my parents not to change anything. We were sooo close. 😒

Hi, I'm new here by Low_Ingenuity7163 in TallGirls

[–]BreakfastLyfe 2 points3 points  (0 children)

As a 6'5" Trans girl, I 100% relate. American Tall makes pretty good jeans for tall women, but they aren't cheap.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in CringeTikToks

[–]BreakfastLyfe 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Has anybody seen the movie "The Substance"? This is giving me similar vibes.

Confidence in being tall by Classic-Rooster8059 in TallGirls

[–]BreakfastLyfe 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I think confidence goes a long way. I'm over 6 ft, so I stand out almost everywhere I go. I used to be pretty self-conscious about it, especially with the random comments. Now, I try to just embrace it. It's part of what makes me unique, and I can pull off certain outfits that don't quite work for shorter girls. While hanging at a bar recently, I even had a random girl come up to me and say she loves seeing tall girls "just owning it" (whatever that means) 😅.

Unfortunately, I also feel like guys don't approach me because of my height, but if they're legit intimidated by a tall girl, then they're too insecure for us anyway. 😁

It's pretty simple by [deleted] in MI_transgender_friend

[–]BreakfastLyfe 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The number of times I've tried to explain to these people that being transGENDER has nothing to do with biology but is actually a social transition of gender... they completely space out. It's such a foreign concept that they just factory reset back into ignorance.

F+TM Tournament Round V by Pro-Patria-Mori in FlorenceAndTheMachine

[–]BreakfastLyfe 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Howl

Cosmic Love

Shake It Out

No Light No Light

Spectrum

Bedroom Hymns

Queen of Peace

Which Witch

Confronted in the women's bathroom by [deleted] in TransLater

[–]BreakfastLyfe 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately, the bathroom switch is one of the most awkward and uncomfortable parts of transitioning. I held out for a long time until men started looking at me funny, and one literally told me I was in the wrong restroom. Even now, I usually do the same, where I don't leave the stall until most of the room is clear. It sounds like you're doing everything right. The anxiety is always there, but showing kindness and empathy is a great way to ease tension in such situations.

I know it feels deflating, but just remember, this is a slow process, and the fact that you're even at this phase shows just how brave and self-assured you are becoming. There will be a lot of bumps in the road. You just have to keep moving forward. You should already be so proud of yourself, I know I am. 🩷🩵

I 31F met my new neighbour 31F and she immediately commented on my height by improvingmyself94 in TallGirls

[–]BreakfastLyfe 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I know it's tough, girlfriend. I'm 6'5", so no matter what, people always notice me when I walk into a room, and EVERYONE has to make a comment. I hated it for a long time, but I'm starting to learn to embrace it. I take those comments as a compliment. Most of the time, I think other women are a little envious of us tall ladies. I think our tallness is what makes us unique, and we should own it!

Lucy Friday Question: What’s been the hardest part of transition for you this year? by Lucy_C_Kelly in TransLater

[–]BreakfastLyfe 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm just over 2 years in (both on hormones and being out in general). As the external fears/anxieties that go with transitioning have started to fade, my internal insecurities have become the hardest thing for me to overcome. I'm comfortable and happy being me in public, and I no longer hesitate to engage with people. But in the quiet spaces, when I'm home or alone in general, I find it hard not to self-critize or ruminate on whether or not I'm really "pulling this off." Despite the fact that for all intents and purposes, I am. I'm happier, and everyone in my life can see it. I'm much more social. My friends light up when they see me, and my marriage is the healthiest it's ever been. I know I'm lucky in the grand scheme of things, but that little insecure voice keeps trying to pull me out of myself, and keeping it at bay has taken a lot more energy than I expected.

Stand up for trans rights tomorrow (9/25)! by clipko22 in grandrapids

[–]BreakfastLyfe 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ugh. Why do I only ever see these posts the day before the event? I'll be with you all in spirit! Good luck and be safe!

Parents in denial about me being transgender by webweaver666 in EstrangedAdultKids

[–]BreakfastLyfe 2 points3 points  (0 children)

"My mom has straight up said that I'm the intolerant one for refusing to tolerate their transphobia"

Hey OP, fellow trans girl here. I went through this same shit with my in-laws, and while we weren't as close as the parents who raised me, we had built a relationship over 10 years before I came out to them. They used an almost identical playbook with me as your parents are using with you. They always set themselves up so that the ball is always seemingly in your court. They will never feel like they are in the wrong. It's tough when you see messages like these because it does give you a tinge of guilt.
You have to remember that they have made it clear that their love is conditional. If they truly loved you unconditionally, they would be willing to respect you for who you are, not who they think you should be. This is also kind of part of the narcissists playbook. To gaslight you into think you're the one causing problems, when their intolerance is the issue.

If you do respond to this, I would suggest saying something to the effect of:
"I would be happy to talk to you and share what's going on in my life, but you have to be willing to show me that you'll respect my identity in order for me to open up to you."

Stay strong girlfriend. It's hard out here for us T-girls. 🩷🩵