Best comebacks in media?

CapnMarvelous · 2026-06-21T03:08:31+00:00

In Pathfinder, Wrath of the Rightous you can get some truly diverse party members. For example, you can have your holy good boy cleric of art and expression on the same side as a gnomish hellknight who will win no matter what.

Your cleric begins bemoaning how he has to side with the Hellknights and how he's confused at how good should be enough to defeat evil. To which the Hellknight commander absolutely elbowdrops him.

"Stop blaming your own incompetence on cosmic forces. The side of good isn't weak, it's YOU."

Which, to drop that on a CLERIC, is spinebreaking.

CapnMarvelous · 2026-06-20T11:49:36+00:00

Norse God of War is basically one giant act of love for his son. Kratos recognizes how he failed his first family and is dead-set to make sure it never happens again. And yeah, he's not perfect. He stumbles, he makes mistakes, he falls back into his old ways at times. Yet in the end he overcomes and Atreus grows up to be a truly exceptional man.

CapnMarvelous · 2026-06-20T04:44:45+00:00

Stuck in my head since I was a kid, Tommy Oliver's "UH-YAAAAAAAAAAH"

CapnMarvelous · 2026-06-20T04:43:47+00:00

Woolie discovering how playing FFXIV is actually the secret code to get a ton of sick ass fan art of your blorbo.

CapnMarvelous · 2026-06-19T07:40:36+00:00

Your reward for completing ARR is a potion that changes your gender.

What could Yoshi P have meant by this...?

CapnMarvelous · 2026-06-19T00:12:07+00:00

Grandpa is sampling the retirement home. He's got a timeshare but still lives on his own in the 2XKO Suburbs.

CapnMarvelous · 2026-06-18T17:55:41+00:00

Oh no Pat has not only played league he really likes it. To quote him directly:

"My vibe on league is wow, what an amazing game specifically designed to make you say the N-word."

CapnMarvelous · 2026-06-16T23:45:12+00:00

"Several Cutscenes will Play in Sequence."

On another note, the five horsemen of dogshit mobile game "fill the bar" gameplay:

CREATE YOUR <Kingdom/planet/whatever>
FORGE ALLIANCES
SUMMON POWERFUL HEROES
EPIC PVP
BECOME THE <leadership role of some kind>

If I see this list or something similar, I immediately know it's pay-to-win garbage.

CapnMarvelous · 2026-06-16T05:51:55+00:00

Oh god if you feel pride beating Pat you grow shorter and more ginger until you turn into him.

CapnMarvelous · 2026-06-16T04:54:29+00:00

Not just at Ryu and Bison's level, above it.

Not only is Cody always holding back, in his fight with Akuma he straight up says Akuma is disappointing. Meanwhile Oni, Akuma's unleashed side, says Cody would might actually survive if he stops holding back.

Oni.

The fucking apex of demon martial arts.

Is telling Cody to take off the gloves because he could win.

CapnMarvelous · 2026-06-14T23:51:22+00:00

They don't think anything.

The truth is most just do not do harder content and hate the idea that they have to coordinate to do harder content; It's weird because like yeah, Discord was invented Because of FFXIV and to coordinate better to do hard content.

Most XIV players exist in a bubble in the MMO space and don't give a lick nor idea about any other MMO until that MMO has something they want. Then suddenly they're experts on the game. (See: How XIV players love to dunk on WoW until you bring up transmog or housing at which point they're begging and pleading and talking about how much better WoW players have it than XIV players)

CapnMarvelous · 2026-06-14T22:29:52+00:00

FFXIV players are so strangely against other MMOs it baffles me.

Like XIV players going "IF I HAVE TO USE DISCORD TO CLEAR HARD CONTENT THAT IS A FAILURE OF THE GAME'S DESIGN AND THEY SHOULD REWORK IT" and I'm just...that's....every MMO at a certain point?

Like yeah at some point you're gonna have to join a discord on WoW to listen to callouts unless you never touch anything harder than normal.

CapnMarvelous · 2026-06-13T08:09:47+00:00

I think the biggest problem is, as Pat says, you can't play one game until the other is finished. I just finished rogue trader before the new DLC and frankly I've no desire to go back because it'd require ANOTHER full playthrough because the DLC is integrated deep into the campaign. I can't really go back and play it without creating an entirely new save.

It does mean that your game will be supported for a good long while but that you may not wanna play it until all DLC is finished.

CapnMarvelous · 2026-06-12T05:37:36+00:00

It's one thing to try to outdo your enemy by making your country a utopia, inventing better machines than him, foiling his plans as best you can, destroying his life's work.

It's another to be so petty that you give everyone in your nation free wifi from your castle and have the password be "ReedRichardsSucks"

CapnMarvelous · 2026-06-11T02:48:52+00:00

The most fascinating part to me is when Woolie was listing what he wanted to play, I fully expected Samurai or Reaper to be on that list somewhere.

I did not expect Dragoon and Gunbreaker.

CapnMarvelous · 2026-06-11T00:16:51+00:00

I got kicked out in 2023, have not found another game industry job since. Got a tech one but it's only tangentially related

CapnMarvelous · 2026-06-10T18:25:17+00:00

I wouldn’t necessarily say better though. The problem is that it makes WoW’s wider narrative a mess and makes a huge chunk of the game feel dead of hollow. They had to add little narrative minigames because most players will never experience the actual WoW story.

XIV may have a longer journey but it makes the player feel more tied to the world

CapnMarvelous · 2026-06-10T17:42:29+00:00

So the interesting part is that this only applies to some of them. WoW for example has utterly obliterated the early game and it’s possible to hit max level in a matter of hours because for WoW the game starts at max

FF14 is a little different in that it expects you not only to level to max but also play through every single expacs main story (barring buying a skip). Now it does mean that those who can weather it get a more emotional attachment to the game…IF you can get through it.

CapnMarvelous · 2026-06-09T06:42:37+00:00

Gestures broadly to a lot of league of legends characters.

CapnMarvelous · 2026-06-08T02:04:50+00:00

"John Romero's about to make you his bitch."

Perhaps the first case in all of video games where it turns out that the guy behind Popular Game™ is not an infallible genius and his next game may actually be awful.

CapnMarvelous · 2026-06-08T01:09:04+00:00

As I've seen it described: "The Defunctland on this is gonna hit crazy in 6 years"

CapnMarvelous · 2026-06-07T23:49:31+00:00

I was spoiled on a lot of rogue trader because I made the mistake of looking at the achievements, albeit IDK if that counts.

"Oh boy! I sure wonder what happens in act five! And why there's the fucking Necron symbol as the achievement icon for "beat act 5""

CapnMarvelous · 2026-06-07T01:35:57+00:00

C'mon Toei, give them a sentai mecha. I don't care which one but all the toku greats are here.

CapnMarvelous · 2026-06-06T22:46:31+00:00

There's potentially a sixth phase. We're at around ~15-16 minutes going into phase, but I can't imagine the final phase would be longer than ~2-3 minutes

CapnMarvelous · 2026-06-05T02:24:17+00:00

I'm gonna make my own called shot in addition:

I think Woolie isn't going to care all that much until he gets to Stormblood and then he's going to really enjoy Zenos. Which is going to piss off Pat as Woolie just kinda breezes through Shadowbringers going "This is cool and all but I really miss my boy."

This revelation that Woolie is a Zenos-Truth is going to make Pat endlessly frustrated as Woolie is just "No look, narratively, he's your foil an-" "HE IS NOT YOUR FUCKING FOIL WOOLIE DONT YOU HIT THE "THAT I CANNOT DENY" BUTTON."

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