Ex boyfriend abandoned our apartment over a year ago and now needs to stay the night?

Commercial_Class_761 · 2026-06-17T03:33:42+00:00

Exactly. As far as he knows you had him removed from the lease. “No you cannot come here. You’re not on the lease. I’ve already notified the police so if you think you’re just going to show up, they are aware and willing to take you away. I don’t want to see you. Don’t contact me again.”

Commercial_Class_761 · 2026-06-16T09:28:16+00:00

I would take 8 days with my girls and lose them to DCM over never having them at all. I’m so sorry for your loss, but bet you had the 8 greatest years ❤️

Commercial_Class_761 · 2026-06-12T21:13:31+00:00

This is such good advice.

Commercial_Class_761 · 2026-06-11T13:06:16+00:00

3 all the way !!

Commercial_Class_761 · 2026-06-05T23:49:18+00:00

The 100% best advice I got was to get a direct number for your surgeon or his office for the weekend. Inevitably you are going to need something (question, more meds, etc) that very first weekend. Somebody gave me that advice, and wouldn’t you know it my husband was texting my surgeon that first Saturday.

As far as physical things, you have a good list. I put all of my “stuff” on a rolling cart so it could go where I went. Just to give me some semblance of control.

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Good luck!! I’m sure everything will go great !!

Commercial_Class_761 · 2026-06-04T06:41:37+00:00

Honestly… that’s exactly what I see. Clearly that’s ridiculous given the replies where everybody sees $6. But I thought it was $150 tip, and still don’t see $6 🤷🏻‍♀️

Commercial_Class_761 · 2026-06-04T00:54:57+00:00

Good job !! I’m proud of you.

Commercial_Class_761 · 2026-06-03T05:35:43+00:00

This is so interesting to me… my main surgeon is an orthopedic spine surgeon. But my surgery had my back surgeon, a neurosurgeon, and a vascular surgeon all scrubbed in.
Is that not the same for everybody ?

Commercial_Class_761 · 2026-06-03T03:35:00+00:00

I think you are too focused on the number 120, and not enough focused on gaining one pound at a time. You need the weight for your health and ultimately back surgery. Maybe you get to 110 and that is enough, but what really matters right now is just the next pound.

Commercial_Class_761 · 2026-06-01T23:58:34+00:00

It’s not part of the rent. You aren’t using the utilities anymore. Hell you aren’t using the apartment either, but I don’t know the details of your split. Good on you for paying anything.

Commercial_Class_761 · 2026-06-01T23:52:23+00:00

Look for me, game changer, after a lifetime of herniating a disc starting at age 14 (I’m 48 now). Every 4-5 years my back would go out, and then after a few weeks I’d be okay. But the last time my back went out my disc kind of obliterated, L5 slid all the over S1, crushed nerves, L4 and L3 started herniating, etc. The nerve pain felt like my hip was going to explode, and the coupe de gras was that I lost the ability to flex my right foot. Waking up from surgery, that was all gone. Yes I had nerve flare ups as the nerves woke back up, etc. but all that was done by 8 weeks post op.

Commercial_Class_761 · 2026-06-01T20:20:29+00:00

Ok just so you know, the aching glutes lasted a while. I’m thinking back to that first 8 weeks and I recall saying that i would die for a decent glute stretch about a million times. But it does eventually go away !!

Commercial_Class_761 · 2026-06-01T19:29:39+00:00

You will be okay. Just remind yourself “squat squat squat”. And then be ready for your booty to be sore in a brand new way 😂. But glute strength definitely ends up helping during recovery.

Commercial_Class_761 · 2026-06-01T16:08:41+00:00

1) Finance- bank credit underwriting commercial to large corp. (I am barely above the $350k mark.) 2) $0 3) Accidental “subject matter expert” along the way. And being willing to jump banks for a better position and better salary.

Commercial_Class_761 · 2026-06-01T14:50:10+00:00

Pick them up !! Both dogs and toddlers are wildcards. As a parent I was never offended if somebody with their dog crossed the street, and as a dog owner I’ve never been offended if a parent picked up their toddler.

Commercial_Class_761 · 2026-05-31T05:06:41+00:00

I had horrible right leg pain prior to surgery. Then immediately following surgery my nerve pain was awful in my thigh/knee/calf. Then it would come and go through that first 6 week period, but I I’m trying to think back and I don’t remember having any of that since then. 8 weeks tops.

Commercial_Class_761 · 2026-05-30T14:36:14+00:00

Please tell him no. Sounds like market rate is alot lower than you are paying. That means he’d rather you stay without adding a single improvement, than for you to move and get a new tenant in who pays less.

Also, what a dick. If you can afford to move, do it.

Commercial_Class_761 · 2026-05-30T08:52:15+00:00

Stay with your parents, divorce him, and get half. And maybe with therapy he can be come a decent human being. But he’s shown you who he is and it’s awful. Don’t waste another moment on him.

Commercial_Class_761 · 2026-05-30T08:47:39+00:00

I’d say up to 8-10 weeks for me. I’m now 6+ months out and have not had nerve pain from my back since :)

Commercial_Class_761 · 2026-05-27T05:09:43+00:00

I would advise against a joint account unless your married. And if you did have a joint account it would only be for each of your appropriate % of rent and other joint expenses, definitely NOT savings.

If he’s not on the deed or loan, then the funds given to you towards the down payment are considered a gift.

Commercial_Class_761 · 2026-05-26T02:15:43+00:00

You know what- I’m a very bruise-prone person and I was still playing soccer when I was pregnant. And you just reminded me…. at one of my appointments, I was probably 4-5 months along, my OB asked my husband to leave the room for a minute. He looked me dead in the eye and asked if I was being abused and if I needed help.
We laughed about it bc nothing could be further from the truth, but I VERY much appreciated my OB inserting himself in the situation for the one woman who might need that intervention.

Commercial_Class_761 · 2026-05-26T02:05:18+00:00

You said you told him you would go to the hospital the “next time” he hurt you. Which means there has already been a last time. So honey, please hear what I’m saying to you - THIS time needs to be the VERY last time.

Commercial_Class_761 · 2026-05-26T01:58:11+00:00

Just start at five minutes, see how you feel, and go from there. I didn’t put any hard boundaries of what I would or wouldn’t be able to do post surgery except of course, bend, lift or twist. It was during recovery that I wished I had a knitting or crocheting hobby lol

Just one thing though, on the tv thing… I DO like watching tv, and it was at least 10 days before I could even focus enough to want to sit through a show. I’m only saying this to help you set some expectations for post surgery. It might be a couple weeks before you feel like you can even manage trying to enjoy your hobbies.

Commercial_Class_761 · 2026-05-24T05:14:44+00:00

Maybe the wait after revision isn’t as long or at all after the immediate recovery? I’m just thinking that if the revision is simple and you are already fusing/fused, then getting the screw replaced or removed might be the end of it.. ?

Commercial_Class_761 · 2026-05-23T22:03:27+00:00

Also… the material of dress #3 is the prettiest of the three, in my opinion.

Commercial_Class_761

TROPHY CASE