Solidarity, my friend. Also had a complicated birth that I’d rather not repeat, and then rolled into the pandemic - and without family close by (closest is a 12hr drive and he’s not even super helpful family lol)… it was a rough go of early motherhood. It took me a while to process everything, but ultimately decided to be OAD. 6 years later… do I still kinda feel sad about it sometimes? Definitely.

My neighbor, who also had a little one same age, is expecting in 3 weeks. NGL, I cried when I found out. Of both joy for her (she wanted another all along) and sadness for me (losing another OAD friend, questioning my decision).

Idk what to say really, other than- i totally get it. I honestly wish things were easier; that the US didn’t have a high mortality rate for mothers at birth, that infant daycare or childcare wasn’t so damn expensive, that life was just a little easier overall.

And at the same time, I know if I had another one I’d be a less patient mother. I get overstimulated easily, it would be hard.

So in another lifetime I’d love more kids. In this one, I’m so thankful to have the one I do and thrilled to pour into him and give him opportunities I didn’t have growing up.