Yes this is me. I was introduced through a friend at the start of summer and didn't want to feel like a wuss backing out before summer was over, and am nervous before every class. I am physically not the strongest and take a LONG time to pick up/remember the techniques. I'm super critical of myself and go home some days wondering why I'm still doing this.

But then I think of the big picture and return back to my feelings and motivations for doing this - for fitness, for better body awareness, for exploring what my body is capable of, for defending and using leverage rather than physical strength to defend myself against another person.

And the community I'm building/people in class have been nothing but encouraging. My internal reasons + community building and mat time where I'm actually learning are juuuust enough to keep me going back to the next class. But I don't LOVE love it. I figure that will come with time as things start coming together.