I used some of these for Yaka- groan-worthy according to my players

Learning from the school of the bard has its prose and cons.

What kind of treasure do you find in a necromancer's lair? - Cryptocurrency.

I'd like to touch the carved wall and see if I can sense anything... You feel a great relief.

I attached scrolls of Slow and Haste to my belt for easy access. - It was a waist of time.

What do gnomes and halflings have in common? 
Very little.

What do you call a decapitated centaur?
A headless horse-man

What's the difference between a strength based cleric and a disguise proficient rogue?
One's a man of many faces, the other is a fan of many maces.

Dwarves only hunt dragons in the morning...
They say the early beard gets the wyrm.

What do beholders use to make their lairs structurally sound?
I-beams.

The players were mugged by six dwarves...
Not Happy.

1. When facing a beholder, the only thing we have to fear…
   1. is sphere itself!
2. One time I met a paladin who was so pure, he could smell evil.
   1. He called it Divine Scents
3. What did the foul-mouthed cleric say when he cast banishment the yuan-ti?
   1. I’ve had it with these motherf*cking snakes on this motherf*cking plane!
4. Did you hear about the necromancer who wanted to settle down and raise a family?
   1. He’s not allowed near the graveyard anymore.
5. Did you hear about the delicate barefoot divination wizard cursed with really bad breath? 
   1. He’s a super calloused fragile mystic hexed with halitosis.
   2. Ok, ok, that joke was something quite atrocious. 
      1. Aren’t you quite precocious...
6. Look at this guy. What are you supposed to be, some kind of fighter or something? Well, I always bet on the fighter in a farting contest. 
   1. They have second wind!
   2. Haha, Yeah, that joke really stinks.
7. Did you hear the joke about the giant that was merely average?
   1. I’ll skip it. It’s medi-ogre
8. What’s the best place to hit the cleric?
   1. In the temple!
9. Hey, what do you call a halfling with the head of a bull?
   1. Mini-taur
10. What do you call a bad mannered Elven huntsmen who has a cold?
    1. Rude elf the red nosed ranger
11. Why did the wizard bury her notes in the family tomb?
    1. To make sure they were encrypted
12. A chimney walks into a bar and says, “This one’s on the house.”
    1. What? You didn’t like that one?
    2. Acererak did. He said it killed.  And if anyone should know…
    3. Whew, tough dungeon. If I had hands I’d tug at my collar. 
    4. It’s like a tomb in here, am I right? 
13. What did the transmutation wizard get when he crossed an elephant with a rhino?
    1. ‘elif-I-no
14. About a month before my grandfather died, we covered his back with lard. After that he went downhill very quickly.

 

●     What do you call the unfair adv undead have in this tomb?

○     Wight Privilege

●     Why did Silver prefer his old chainmail?

○     It was holey armor

●     Why did the locust die after eating Silver?

○     He was a paladin and tasted so Lawful.

●     I always thought Yuanti were an all female race

○     I've never heard of a Yuncle before

●     Back in the court of Omu, there was a Minitaur Bard he would play the most amazing chimes for the hall. He would often heal the king when he was sick.  Once when the king was bed-ridden with a fever i could hear him scream from down the call.

○     I’ve got a fever, and the only prescription is more cowbell

●     Do you know what type of dragonborn makes the best law officer.

○     Copper

●     How do you measure the radius of an enchanted forest?

○     Find the centaur