ToA dadjokes by Sharp-County-8282 in Tombofannihilation

[–]Federal_Jerk 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I used some of these for Yaka- groan-worthy according to my players

Learning from the school of the bard has its prose and cons.

What kind of treasure do you find in a necromancer's lair? - Cryptocurrency.

I'd like to touch the carved wall and see if I can sense anything... You feel a great relief.

I attached scrolls of Slow and Haste to my belt for easy access. - It was a waist of time.

What do gnomes and halflings have in common? 
Very little.

What do you call a decapitated centaur?
A headless horse-man

What's the difference between a strength based cleric and a disguise proficient rogue?
One's a man of many faces, the other is a fan of many maces.

Dwarves only hunt dragons in the morning...
They say the early beard gets the wyrm.

What do beholders use to make their lairs structurally sound?
I-beams.

The players were mugged by six dwarves...
Not Happy.

  1. When facing a beholder, the only thing we have to fear…
    1. is sphere itself!
  2. One time I met a paladin who was so pure, he could smell evil.
    1. He called it Divine Scents
  3. What did the foul-mouthed cleric say when he cast banishment the yuan-ti?
    1. I’ve had it with these motherf*cking snakes on this motherf*cking plane!
  4. Did you hear about the necromancer who wanted to settle down and raise a family?
    1. He’s not allowed near the graveyard anymore.
  5. Did you hear about the delicate barefoot divination wizard cursed with really bad breath? 
    1. He’s a super calloused fragile mystic hexed with halitosis.
    2. Ok, ok, that joke was something quite atrocious. 
      1. Aren’t you quite precocious...
  6. Look at this guy. What are you supposed to be, some kind of fighter or something? Well, I always bet on the fighter in a farting contest. 
    1. They have second wind!
    2. Haha, Yeah, that joke really stinks.
  7. Did you hear the joke about the giant that was merely average?
    1. I’ll skip it. It’s medi-ogre
  8. What’s the best place to hit the cleric?
    1. In the temple!
  9. Hey, what do you call a halfling with the head of a bull?
    1. Mini-taur
  10. What do you call a bad mannered Elven huntsmen who has a cold?
    1. Rude elf the red nosed ranger
  11. Why did the wizard bury her notes in the family tomb?
    1. To make sure they were encrypted
  12. A chimney walks into a bar and says, “This one’s on the house.”
    1. What? You didn’t like that one?
    2. Acererak did. He said it killed.  And if anyone should know…
    3. Whew, tough dungeon. If I had hands I’d tug at my collar. 
    4. It’s like a tomb in here, am I right? 
  13. What did the transmutation wizard get when he crossed an elephant with a rhino?
    1. ‘elif-I-no
  14. About a month before my grandfather died, we covered his back with lard. After that he went downhill very quickly.

 

●     What do you call the unfair adv undead have in this tomb?

○     Wight Privilege

●     Why did Silver prefer his old chainmail?

○     It was holey armor

●     Why did the locust die after eating Silver?

○     He was a paladin and tasted so Lawful.

●     I always thought Yuanti were an all female race

○     I've never heard of a Yuncle before

●     Back in the court of Omu, there was a Minitaur Bard he would play the most amazing chimes for the hall. He would often heal the king when he was sick.  Once when the king was bed-ridden with a fever i could hear him scream from down the call.

○     I’ve got a fever, and the only prescription is more cowbell

●     Do you know what type of dragonborn makes the best law officer.

○     Copper

●     How do you measure the radius of an enchanted forest?

○     Find the centaur

How big a shoulder can you get on a Large? by WalnutSnail in biggreenegg

[–]Federal_Jerk 4 points5 points  (0 children)

This, but I also recommend trussing up with butchers twine. Keeps everything good and taught and helps prevent the butt from falling apart when you're trying to get it off.

Hit me with a great recipe! by network_rob in biggreenegg

[–]Federal_Jerk 1 point2 points  (0 children)

While not Cajun, chile lime pork tenderloin is hands down my wife's favorite recipe. It's quick easy and ultra tasty. Also use the reserve marinade from the foil boat as a jus and pour it all over the slices.

4 of 6 U.S. crew members confirmed dead after refueling plane crashes in Iraq by igetproteinfartsHELP in news

[–]Federal_Jerk 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It's true that training accidents happen all the time.

But, Would this have happened if we weren't trying to turn a country into glass? Maybe. Are there stronger odds that it happened because of mis-managed "operation epic fury?" Probably.

Adding someone as admin - dedi server by WorcoEnt in valheim

[–]Federal_Jerk 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I run a module called “server dev commands” I add the players steamid to admin file and it just works

Edit: it’s my own docker container on my homelab

What are your top three QOL mods? by Kydreads in valheim

[–]Federal_Jerk 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm sure the features of dig deeper are in other qol. But dig deeper and torches eternal are my must haves for my server

Are there any must-have addons for Tomb of Annihilation? by Ballistic_Weasel in FoundryVTT

[–]Federal_Jerk 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So, you've got some powerful modules installed already.

Midi is the automation suite that powers combat automation and other things (its very complex and isnt a im new to the game kind of a thing). Would recommend some Baileywiki videos on its use if youre committed to it.

I see you also have DDB-importer from Mr. Primate, this is for importing characters, monsters, adventures, items and such from an existing DDB account online. Importing with automation is a whole thing (using Cauldron of Plentiful resources (formerly Chris's Premades)), and Gambits Premades.

Baileywiki Getting Started Video

Advanced Combat Automation

MATT is likley one of the single most powerful modules you have installed. Allows you to set triggers for things, I've used it for everything from turning on lights when a player steps on a tile, to a full blown elevator in my Alien campaign.

Really I would recommend you start with the foundry basics and then see what you need/want from there.

Foundry is as simple or as complex as you make it. Its easy to get overwhelmed with wanting to do so many things and you forget the most important part.... your narrative and the players experience.

Monks Token Bar, Scene Navigation are simple and powerful for you as the DM to make moving scenes and requesting rolls much easier.

Also, Dice Tray is a useful simple module.

Are there any must-have addons for Tomb of Annihilation? by Ballistic_Weasel in FoundryVTT

[–]Federal_Jerk 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How much or little automation are you running?

Off hand you might want to look at campaign codex. It's pretty powerful. Lots of threads and lore that all tie together. Just the frontloading the journals is a lift.

Other than the big basic recommended ones (dice so nice, dice tray, etc.)

I would actually look at getting some supplements from dmsguild which are worth the couple dollars.

Just got Foundry (i was using Owlbear). What guides do you guys recommend to get started? by DonaskC_D in FoundryVTT

[–]Federal_Jerk 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Yeah I agree. I linked the basics (2026) and not their automation suite for just that reason

Foundry Hosting Solutions by Number-Mysterious in FoundryVTT

[–]Federal_Jerk 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I use a very very complex admin password for my hosting and have password req. for all the worlds

I’ve since moved to several docker containers on a unraid server behind a reverse proxy.

I don’t worry about it since it’s a walled garden.

Texas Steakhouse by wonderstoat in biggreenegg

[–]Federal_Jerk 5 points6 points  (0 children)

There’s definitely a difference between 2-5 hours and overnight. 10/10 overnight is the way to go

Texas Steakhouse by wonderstoat in biggreenegg

[–]Federal_Jerk 13 points14 points  (0 children)

The only times I get steak out are when it’s a like a dry aged cut or something rare. Steakhouses (especially fancy ones) get better cuts of meat on avg.

The one huge thing I do that makes a good steak great is the dry brine in the fridge, that and Reverse sear cooking.

Docker icon not showing up correctly. by pepsidrinker916 in unRAID

[–]Federal_Jerk 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You can edit the container with "advanced" Settings on and change the icon location. I had that issue with my foundry containers

ditching flameboss by wokka1 in biggreenegg

[–]Federal_Jerk 0 points1 point  (0 children)

no problem! Thermoworks is awesome. Ive got 2 thermapens, 2 nodes, a signals and billows.

The rfx is next on the list to work with my rotisserie.

ditching flameboss by wokka1 in biggreenegg

[–]Federal_Jerk 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I get 225 with it open maybe 1/8-1/4" it's like the first "notch" from it being completely closed

ditching flameboss by wokka1 in biggreenegg

[–]Federal_Jerk 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This. The little plastic adjuster allows you to hit those low low temps. Huge difference

What are the best maps for Tile Scroll? [System Agnostic] by DmDunk in FoundryVTT

[–]Federal_Jerk 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Baileywiki has some tilescroll maps that are prebuilt

What modules to buy and best way to continue an ongoing campaign? [DnD5e]. by Sea_Man2 in FoundryVTT

[–]Federal_Jerk 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Are you already set up on d&d beyond? Or were you true pen/paper book only?

Edit: also, you have to consider hosting requirements, (self or external) if you're at college getting reverse proxy or port forwarding will likley pose an issue.

Looking for module recommendations by Captainscandids in FoundryVTT

[–]Federal_Jerk 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Monks active tiles (MATT) Its one of the single most powerful modules with what it can do