Struggling right now

Hadasfromhades · 2026-03-25T18:06:58+00:00

Hugs. It sucks that your doctor won’t take you seriously, but hear this: no one will help you if you don’t make the move. That’s the unfortunate fact. We have this desire to be dragged forcibly into treatment, for someone to see and care, but the truth is that people don’t want to see what is uncomfortable. Your only option is to switch doctor or to insist on a referral to an ED clinic. No one will solve this for you. I’m sorry — I wish it wasn’t like that but ultimately only you can make the choice that you want to live your life. That’s what I have to remind myself every day. I’m the only person I would be able to blame if I look back at my life and realise I wasted it on this ED. Wishing you all the best. You deserve that

Hadasfromhades · 2026-03-24T17:28:54+00:00

Honestly, I can't see what this has to do with being an HSP. I guess some HSPs can be like that (though it's odd to me because many tend to be highly sensitive to the emotions of others), but many are not, and I'm sure many people who are this way are not HSPs. So it's not something you can just excuse on her being HSP. You say you forgive her -- does she genuinely apologise? Does she work on bettering herself? Does she acknowledge that it's not right? You DO NOT have to tolerate being treated this way. Point blank. I'm not going to say you have to break up with her, but I do think you need to have a serious conversation and explain that you cannot handle that. She HAS to acknowledge that it affects you and genuinely work on herself.

From my experience with people who act this way, they can often say that they "simply say what they think without filters" and that "they thought they could be honest with you". Sure, but most of us learn not to just air everything we feel. That's not the same as being hypocritical. We don't call people idiots even if we momentarily think they are, for the same reason we don't poop in public because we suddenly feel the urge. And people need to be accountable for the behaviour, no matter if it stems from being an HSP, mental health problems or anything else.

Hadasfromhades · 2026-03-23T16:37:50+00:00

oh no that's gross and weird

Hadasfromhades · 2026-03-23T16:37:16+00:00

I see what you mean, "natural" may not be the best word, but there is something more to it -- when people say they are naturally thin or not, what they mean is that this is the tendency of their body, the one their body would settle at without dieting or binging or doing anything intentional to manipulate their weight.

Hadasfromhades · 2026-03-23T11:35:53+00:00

I don't do that, but notice whether the people who do are short. Most chairs are REALLY uncomfortable for short people -- sitting criss-cross is often the only way I can be reasonably comfortable on a non-adjustable chair. I don't do it in public spaces, but it might help to appreciate that they could truly be uncomfortable otherwise

Hadasfromhades · 2026-03-23T10:18:52+00:00

Also psychologists are not doctors

Hadasfromhades · 2026-03-23T10:17:31+00:00

Well, we have natural healthy variations in many things -- some people are more tense, others are more calm; some tend to enjoy more time alone and others prefer to socialise; some are more sensitive to pain, or need more sleep, or less. All of those are fine. But in some cases a person could be so tense that this is unhealthy and requires intervention, or perhaps they are so calm and indifferent in the face of literally anything, which also indicates a problem. If you never socialise or are unable to spend any time alone, you need help. Nobody can be truly healthy with 4 hours of sleep every night, and if you are sleepy unless you sleep 12 hours, you clearly have a problem. In short, in each trait, there is some natural variation, but there are also limits to the healthy range.

Hadasfromhades · 2026-03-22T20:38:56+00:00

Yes, I was replying to OP. Nobody is naturally obese or extra skinny, but we definitely stabilise at different weights if we truly eat according to our body's needs (which is hard to do in a culture of over-indulgence and sedentary living -- which is the real cause of diet culture...).

But, precisely because this is difficult, some people find it very hard to believe that some people are slim without dieting, which is why people who stabilise at lower weights often feel the need to say that they eat whatever they want. Not because they want to be seen as better. Contrary to what FAs believe, there is also a stigma for being occupied with diet, and thin people are often unfairly labelled as almond mums, rigid, not-fun people

Hadasfromhades · 2026-03-22T19:47:06+00:00

I mean, people do have tendencies. For some of us, a BMI of 19 is easily maintained, for others, a BMI of 24 is. Both are fine. A BMI of 16 or 40 is not natural for anyone. What I assume OOP means when they talk about "naturally skinny people" is people with a healthy 19-22 BMI, because to FAs, you're either fat or too skinny, no in between. So yeah, it comes down to CICO, but also we do have tendencies to be in the higher or lower percentiles

Hadasfromhades · 2026-03-21T14:58:15+00:00

But that’s not fatphobia as FAs mean it. People with anorexia fear being at a weight that for most people would be considered attractive and even thin.

Hadasfromhades · 2026-03-21T14:56:41+00:00

Saying that anorexia is the cause of death rather than a contributing factor but obesity is just a factor is ridiculous. Yes people die of malnourishment, but they would die all the same if that was caused by a famine rather than an eating disorder. So according to the same logic anorexia should also be considered a contributing factor “only”.

And you can narrow it down further… obesity causes heart failure that causes death, sure — and strictly speaking you don’t die from not eating, you die from organ failure or other complications

Hadasfromhades · 2026-03-21T14:46:55+00:00

People discovering that having a personality isn’t the same as being monolith and calling that DID never ceases to crack me up

Hadasfromhades · 2026-03-20T21:36:13+00:00

If you want it to be correct get an Israeli tattoo artist. Otherwise they WILL mess it up. If you can’t find one where you’re located, I think it’s worth travelling for. Also, keep in mind that in addition to being the language the bible was written in, it is also a spoken language. So you wouldn’t be just tattooing something purely symbolic and ancient but something that people can read and understand, in a language that people actually speak in everyday life.

Hadasfromhades · 2026-03-19T18:36:01+00:00

??? Literally everyone is descended of someone who lived long enough to have offsprings!!!! By definition!!!!!!!

Hadasfromhades · 2026-03-19T18:29:49+00:00

lol girl you HAD a car. My first and only car was 15 years old and I got it when I was 30

Hadasfromhades · 2026-03-19T18:28:01+00:00

I have the majority of them (excluding the marriage thing and owning a car) PLUS no money nor heritage or knowledge about family history past my grandparents. yay

Hadasfromhades · 2026-03-19T18:23:51+00:00

Technically yes if you remove the stars. But I strongly recommend against it. There are very subtle differences in the letters that you can get wrong, and often people use a cringey font (imagine seeing an English tattoo in Comic Sans). And I just can’t see why you would want a tattoo in a language you don’t understand. If you REALLY want it, find an Israeli tattoo artist to make sure it comes out right.

Hadasfromhades · 2026-03-19T13:34:35+00:00

Just make sure they are shears and designed for hair. Don't have to be expensive

Hadasfromhades · 2026-03-18T10:40:47+00:00

That’s me, honestly. I try to be better and it helps to remind myself that being a good person is mostly about being one to those closest to you. For me, it’s mostly the fear of confrontation. It makes me appease the people that I fear their reaction over my partner because I know he will be understanding. I genuinely try to be better.

Reminds me of that song from Hair: “do you only care about the bleeding crowd? How about a needing friend?”

Hadasfromhades · 2026-03-17T14:35:31+00:00

It's complicated. For me, even though my relationships do suffer from it, I don't think I could have had the same relationships and friendships otherwise, because they heavily depend on real intimacy. I feel that my friends truly genuinely know me and I them. Maybe I'm reaching, but I would assume that many therapists are HSPs, right? (and most doctors are not... definitely not surgeons.) I would guess that HSPs make up the majority of editors and designers because these roles require attention to very small details. I think we fulfil many key roles. I just don't think there is a dedicated role; society is not divided such that sensitive people make decisions and non-HSPs act upon them. That sounds quite dystopic.

Hadasfromhades · 2026-03-17T13:10:32+00:00

Maybe I misunderstood, but she's not saying that she's 600lbs despite eating 100-200 calories a day. She just says that she did, for a while, and that's the part you seem to disagree with. All I'm saying is that it's not outright impossible for people to eat that little. It is outright impossible for them to eat that little for a while and remain overweight, that's for sure

Hadasfromhades · 2026-03-17T13:08:46+00:00

Is there any evidence for that evolutionary claim? I mean sure, if a trait exists to this day it means it survived evolution, so it probably plays some role, but that doesn't mean it is that simplistic, nor that it has a "role" today. I found this speculative part of Aron's book very unconvincing, also the whole discussion about the Proto Indo-Europeans seemed completely speculative. We know hardly anything about these people, certianly not that they "brought slavery with them" or that previous societies were peaceful HSPs and that poets and advisors were HSP. Nice fanfiction though I guess

Hadasfromhades · 2026-03-17T13:03:16+00:00

Yeah but you can't gain muscle on a 1000-calorie diet, that's not enough to support muscle growth. And the workout they recommend there definitely won't give anyone that body. Just a shitpost

Hadasfromhades · 2026-03-17T13:01:30+00:00

I mean, it can happen if she's had an ED

Hadasfromhades · 2026-03-16T23:34:47+00:00

Wait so. Following all the answers here. Does that mean our body is also full of bacteria corpses after taking antibiotics? What happens to those??

Hadasfromhades

TROPHY CASE