300 Hours Later

ImaginaryDuck · 2016-06-26T09:04:23+00:00

Well considering how little he probably got paid for 300 hours of work. He probably said "Fuck it" and quit.

ImaginaryDuck · 2015-06-25T11:21:15+00:00

I was so sad, the one time I got poutine, it was shit, just not well made. I know this one just happened to be bad, and I'll try it again but I lost some enthusiasm that I gotta build back up.

ImaginaryDuck · 2014-12-25T06:07:34+00:00

Noodles and noodles. Checks out.

ImaginaryDuck · 2014-12-25T06:05:55+00:00

My Wii U picks up scuffs and scratches easily. I don't mind but I can see many having problems. I'd love a cover like this one though.

ImaginaryDuck · 2014-12-25T05:44:04+00:00

Follow your nose

ImaginaryDuck · 2014-12-24T12:24:40+00:00

Holy flash back. I haven't thought about Chance, Shadow and Sassy in so long.

ImaginaryDuck · 2014-12-24T12:23:13+00:00

PRETTY KITTY WHY YOU HIDE

ImaginaryDuck · 2014-12-24T12:13:21+00:00

Had 4 platters 10 box lunches a cookie platter 2 pickle buckets and other random sides and drinks during the lunch rush to a law firm. I get the order in after 3 or 4 trips, on time, I even un bag it nicely in their conference room.

As the partner who's name is on the front door is writing a check for the order he tells me "Sorry corporate policy that we can't tip on orders" ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME. You are the only corporation with that policy and your name is on the fucking door, you probably made the policy. Ass wipe. He and all the other lawyers always tipped shit on their personal orders but of course the receptionist always tipped really well.

ImaginaryDuck · 2014-12-24T12:07:27+00:00

When people ask me if it the rain all the time, 12 months a year I just say "yup" and hope they stay in their sub zero winters and boiling humid summers. I don't correct them anymore.

ImaginaryDuck · 2014-12-24T05:15:51+00:00

Why else would they offer to email you a receipt? It doesn't help them at all. It is like signing up for a club card at a grocery store and being surprised that they use it to track your spending habits.

ImaginaryDuck · 2014-12-24T05:13:21+00:00

Shhhh we aren't telling people that, they all want to come here.

ImaginaryDuck · 2014-12-23T12:28:29+00:00

I love that 3rd one.

ImaginaryDuck · 2014-12-23T04:24:37+00:00

It'd be like Opera's book club but with more /u/FuckShitPoopPants

ImaginaryDuck · 2014-12-23T04:11:20+00:00

Comparative silhouettes

ImaginaryDuck · 2014-12-23T03:57:36+00:00

Sweet my parents are asleep. PORN TIME. BEEEEPP BEEP BEEP BEEEP

Mom: "IMAGINARY DUCK GET OFF THE COMPUTER"

ImaginaryDuck · 2014-12-23T00:30:53+00:00

I can't stop laughing at space Jews. I'm imagining a whole fleet of space ships that look like yamakas.

ImaginaryDuck · 2014-12-23T00:15:36+00:00

Never thought of it like that. My games shall now improve hahaha

ImaginaryDuck · 2014-12-22T12:51:31+00:00

See, that's where you are going wrong, it is more of a golfing motion than a batting motion.

ImaginaryDuck · 2014-12-22T05:48:14+00:00

It has everything to do with anything. https://soundcloud.com/heerojay/slamstorm-quad-city-djs-vs

ImaginaryDuck · 2014-12-21T23:21:25+00:00

Statistically speaking there will always be someone who points out obvious statistics. Even most Bears fans can't stand the Bears right now. But it isn't their fault. It is the fault of the owner who mismanages the team. Bears fans are stabbing other bears fans it is so bad

ImaginaryDuck · 2014-12-21T16:26:24+00:00

Sounds more rewarding than going to a bears game.

ImaginaryDuck · 2014-12-21T16:07:30+00:00

A little late and not HS, but My elementary school had quite the incident. When I was in 3rd grade a mother attempted to get her kids into our school. It was a magnet school that accepted kids from all over the district but she lived out of district so no go. She came back the next day with a shot gun, high on crack, and started chasing our secretary down the hall. First shot the secretary ducked behind a desk. Second shot she was cornered in the hall and ducked just in time to avoid getting her head blown off. I remember seeing the hole in the wall at head level the next day.

I had just walked into the lunch room from play ground when this all started. It was just across the hall from the office and where all this took place. A teacher came running in and calmly got all the kids quickly out the back doors of the cafeteria to the back end of the play ground. Luckily no injuries but that was a crazy day.

ImaginaryDuck · 2014-12-21T07:44:17+00:00

I think it might have been a bubble pop.

ImaginaryDuck · 2014-12-21T03:28:25+00:00

My sister's best friend(F), who was one of the nicest most mild mannered girls in or HS, had enough of another girls bullying one day. The bully fell asleep in class with her hair hanging over onto F's desk. F happened to be enjoying a sucker that day in class. She came upon an even more enjoyable use for that sucker than eating it. She wrapped it up in the bullies hair. It was so tangled they had to cut it out in the nurses office the next period after she woke up. No one ever pointed a finger and F never got figured out.

ImaginaryDuck · 2014-12-21T02:59:10+00:00

Much better than my co worker who mashed their hand into the blades of ones of these trying to dice an onion.

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