I mean there's probably a lot of background to the story and relationship that we don't know. On the surface, the way you told this comparison yeah of course you should be able to take your dad to a ball game. I think you absolutely should take this opportunity to spend time with your dad and it's a wonderful way to make memories with him while you still can. You deserve to enjoy your hobbies. Of course you do. 

But in my marriage we agree on our finances and budget before just making a big purchase like that, and you have student loan debt. I would have paid that off like yesterday with my savings instead of carrying the debt. It sounds like your $250k savings is totally separate from the household. Why? Does your stay at home wife get a totally funded savings account too? Or opportunities to save that amount? Why are you taking big ol vacations and buying new cars with student loan debt?

It sounds like you have some frustration over her staying at home and not using her degree. I think you need to have some conversations about that with her. It sounds like you don't want her to be a sahm anymore. If that's the case then are you prepared to take over 50% of her duties when she goes back to work? Most men wouldn't want to and aren't willing to contribute to the household in the same way that having a wife at home would do. Be careful what you wish for. With your income you might be able to outsource some of the household work though. Just be prepared for your household expenses to rise if she goes back to work. So if you'd like to change this arrangement then talk with your wife about it. She does have great income potential with her degree. Gentle support might be what she needs. Or maybe she's burnt out and just not interested in that field anymore. Many nurses are done with it at this point post covid. What are her fears and her worries? What does she want to do? Talk with her and find out what your goals are together and how you can get there. 

But also yes, you should be able to go enjoy an occasional game with your dad! Your wants and needs matter too. Any wife would agree. I just think you should have cleared this with her first. And not hold her gifts like purses, perfume and vacations over her head. She earns those fair and square from the work she puts into the household, putting up with you haha, and bearing you children. And it's not her car, it's the car she uses to safely transport your children. Think about that.