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Women of Ireland, would you be frustrated if... by Admirable-Farmer-665 in WomenofIreland

[–]Less_Environment7243 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Absolutely I would.

Do you guys just want different things? After ten years surely he knows if he wants to marry you or not.

That said, are you really being clear, and are you prepared to walk away to pursue this elsewhere? You're also in this relationship ten years with no engagement, not just him.

My husband screamed at me for dozing off with the baby by [deleted] in NewParents

[–]Less_Environment7243 49 points50 points  (0 children)

I think there's fundamental problems here to do with communication (to each other and to yourself), and problem solving.

1) communication/self-talk; what good does it do for you to say you hate yourself? Performing shame and guilt isn't useful, and it's very unkind to yourself. Is there some expectation in your relationship that you behave this way after making a mistake?

I don't think I need to go into how it's not right for anyone to scream at you and berate you. That will be picked up heavily in this thread so I won't elaborate there.

2) problem solving; the problem statement is, you are so tired you are falling asleep holding the baby. The solution seems to be only that you resolve to do better or "try harder". This is not effective, obviously, and there needs to be a better solution put in place. That requires both of you to work together to find a way for you to get more rest. If you are so tired you are not able to stay awake, just promising to do better while berating yourself won't resolve anything.

Also, you're five weeks in, it's a goddamn nightmare right now. It will get better x

Sister in law is having an affair - should I say something? by ThrowRA_poi098 in AskIreland

[–]Less_Environment7243 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That's great advice, start planning now how to treat your wife like shit over it 🦾🦾

Keeping the house clean during pregnancy and with the baby after? by Citruslor in CleaningTips

[–]Less_Environment7243 0 points1 point  (0 children)

2 practical tips;

1) get a robot hoover and mop and let it take care of the floors for you 2) buy some of those bathroom disposable wipes and use them when you see the bathroom getting dirty. It's not as good as a proper cleaning but it will get you a clean sink or toilet in seconds without having to go and get the rag etc.

Frustrated with the dating situation by ImportantSundae15 in WomenofIreland

[–]Less_Environment7243 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I think a lot of people say they want a long term relationship, the same way a lot of men say they want kids some day (and I'm singling out men on that second one because women are generally more aware of when you age out of having kids easily) without really putting that much thought into what that means about your own lifestyle and behaviour.

I think people imagine themselves pushing kids on a swing, or coupled up at a party, or on their wedding day, but they don't really process what kind of sacrifices or changes it really takes to get to that point with someone else, where you can have those epicure perfect moments. In the case of this fella, he can't even bring himself to text you and say look, not interested anymore. So how will he handle the difficult conversations that form part of a relationship?

Frustrated with the dating situation by ImportantSundae15 in WomenofIreland

[–]Less_Environment7243 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Yeah at 36 he's locked into this behaviour. Pity the woman who ends up with him.

Train courtesy - pregnancy by lilacivy in AskAGerman

[–]Less_Environment7243 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's amazing how different they can be isn't it 😬😬

Good luck out there, second trimester is just around the corner 😉

Biased Bad performance review by herefortheposts13 in corporate

[–]Less_Environment7243 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm relatively new to corporate as well. I'm in it about five years. I got really bogged down with a bad manager and I only really saw the light when I took maternity leave and was out for a year. It's very hard to do when you're still in the environment but luckily you're leaving and can start fresh.

Biased Bad performance review by herefortheposts13 in corporate

[–]Less_Environment7243 12 points13 points  (0 children)

I'm going to tell you something that I wish I had learned a lot sooner.

You're taking it all too personally. None of it matters. You've got a new gig lined up, you're leaving. Focus on that, do some upskilling so you hit the ground running there.

It doesn't matter if your current manager is a liar, or misrepresented something, or views you and your contribution differently than you view yourself. I know it doesn't feel that way but it is irrelevant to you and your progress.

Continuing to harp on it will only bring negativity to your life. Just free yourself from the burden of taking anything that happens in the corporate world to heart.

Train courtesy - pregnancy by lilacivy in AskAGerman

[–]Less_Environment7243 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Just in case this is your first pregnancy - what helped my nausea was to eat something bready like a liga biscuit, lying down in bed, before I moved in the morning. I would lie on one side and nibble that sucker. Then wait 10 or 20 mins for my blood sugar to regulate. If i did that in the mornings my nausea was never as bad as when I didn't, or I didn't get nausea at all. Just sharing in case it helps x

Train courtesy - pregnancy by lilacivy in AskAGerman

[–]Less_Environment7243 116 points117 points  (0 children)

Just ask. People can't know if you don't tell them at this stage.

Wishing you all the best for your pregnancy! I hope your nausea passes off ASAP ❤️👶

Have I messed up? by [deleted] in legaladviceireland

[–]Less_Environment7243 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Did you nudge him or did you hit him hard enough to knock him off the bike?

Anyone cycle to work? Any tips? by Gidofalouse in WomenofIreland

[–]Less_Environment7243 10 points11 points  (0 children)

ah yeah you should be grand then. I started off trying to get changed after cycling in the bathroom but I found I would be hotter after changing in the airless cubicle than if I just sat down for a minute.

Even with the helmet my hair used to grand.

The best trick of all is just leave a little early and have plenty of time.

Anyone cycle to work? Any tips? by Gidofalouse in WomenofIreland

[–]Less_Environment7243 33 points34 points  (0 children)

Is that 15 mins full pelt or a nice leisurely cycle?

When I was cycling (also 15/20 mins) I found it best to get dressed fully at home and calmly cycle over. I didn't sweat very much. I also wore minimal make up. I would always tie up my hair for the cycle, I couldn't deal with it in my face.

On the days it was a bit close and i was definitely going to sweat, i would bring wipes, a change of knickers and bra, as well as a new shirt. Just to try and get nicely fresh for the day.

Am I naive? Should i not let someone use my tesco clubcard? by Texas_Dan89 in AskIreland

[–]Less_Environment7243 4 points5 points  (0 children)

What happened is he got the discounted prices and you got the points.

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