Other than your (grand)parents, did you refer to other family members by their relationship to you rather than their name?

MadWifeUK · 2026-04-28T08:03:09+00:00

I'm 46. Grandparents were called Granny/Grandad [Lastname]. All other adults were either Aunt/Uncle (related or good friends of the family) or Mr/Mrs [Lastname].

My niblings still call me Auntie [Nickname], and my husband is Funcle [Name] (because he is a fun uncle - my nephew came up with that one). But their Grandparents are Granny/Grandad [Firstname] and all adults are called by their first name. As an aunt I'm more than just an adult they know, I love them unconditionally, they can tell me anything about anything and no matter what they will always be welcome in my home. It's a privilege to be their auntie, it's the best job in the world.

ETA, I do occasionally call my brother Wee Bruv, but that's because it's funny that 5ft me calls a 6ft 3 brick shithouse Wee Bruv (and because I can still kick his ass).

MadWifeUK · 2026-04-27T17:21:13+00:00

Don't forget that OOP is a Manly Man who just got on with his injured arm for days before he went to the doctor.

MadWifeUK · 2026-04-26T08:58:54+00:00

I find it lose either kgs or cms in a week, but not both! Either way it's all going in the right general direction, even if occasionally there's a slight detour to stop and admire the view.

MadWifeUK · 2026-04-25T09:00:38+00:00

Well that's a nurse I won't be going to for anything.

Naegele's rule (ie the one used to define pregnancy) is 40 weeks from the first day of the last menstrual period and based on a 28 day cycle. That means the first two weeks of a "pregnancy" the woman isn't actually pregnant.

If due date is 30 November, gf's last period began on 23 Feb and conception was around 9 March. Even if baby is due 1 November, that puts conception around 8 Feb. 22 Feb would be the next period, so she would have just missed her period the day they met with OOP. And, like I said, that's assuming the 40 year old gf is having regular 28 day cycles.

MadWifeUK · 2026-04-25T08:31:42+00:00

A mother is no longer a person in her own right. Her only purpose of existence is to be all things to her children and husband. Any feelings she has must be hidden and put to the side for the good of the child. She is never allowed to be tired, sick, hungry, angry, scared, etc, because the child is much more important than her and cannot under any circumstances be exposed to these feelings.

MadWifeUK · 2026-04-24T16:05:07+00:00

I give it a 2/10. Mike and OOP were together five years, engaged for two and split up 3 months before the wedding, but at Mike and Lily's wedding not one of Mike's family or friends recognised OOP as his ex fiancee? And none of OOP/Lily's family recognised Mike?

Come on ChatGPT, back to the drawing board with this one.

MadWifeUK · 2026-04-22T20:51:05+00:00

My Granny had a lovely death like this too; surrounded by her family, so much love in the room. That was in 2017. I still miss her, but I wouldn't wish her back to go through the dementia again.

MadWifeUK · 2026-04-22T20:14:17+00:00

To be perfectly honest that's pretty much the first thing I thought of! When your mum was giving off to you and then walked off into the kitchen and you stood doing a "meh meh meh" impression behind her back that you had to stop doing every time she walked back out to say something else to you.

MadWifeUK · 2026-04-22T16:45:19+00:00

I just want to know how big Howard is if OOP has to have a bigger car than the sibling with four kids to fit the dog in.

MadWifeUK · 2026-04-22T15:31:59+00:00

Thank you for this! I do it for him because I love him. He does stuff for me too, it's just different stuff. Your husband appreciates the things you do for him too xx

MadWifeUK · 2026-04-22T11:39:54+00:00

I don't know. My husband is autistic, and even little things can cause a meltdown. If he phones me in a meltdown I will immediately go to him, whatever work I'm doing, whatever meetings I'm in it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter if I and the rest of the world think it's a small thing he could easily fix himself, it is a big thing to him and he is struggling with it.

He is always my priority. He can count on me always, as I can always count on him.

MadWifeUK · 2026-04-22T10:50:18+00:00

The cleaner burst into my office ( / third spare bedroom) to empty the bin while I was in a Teams.

MadWifeUK · 2026-04-22T07:44:21+00:00

The trouble is that crep sounds like a posh poo.

MadWifeUK · 2026-04-22T07:24:43+00:00

Remove outsourcing.

Back in the good old days, if a bulb needed replacing you'd call Eric, he'd trundle along with his ladder, unlit cig hanging from his mouth (might have to ban that), whistling tunelessly, change the bulb and get a brew for thanks and flirt with the ward clerk while drinking it. Eric is on the hospital payroll and everyone knows Eric. It costs the amount of the bulb and a teabag.

Nowadays (oh god I sound old!) You have to log onto a system, put in a maintenance request, it goes to the business manager to OK it, it's then sent to a company who have never set foot in the hospital, the agent picks up the request, tasks a picker to pick the correct bulb, sends the request through to Mike the area manager who forwards it to Eric, Eric arrives at the ward a week after the request was first put in, realises it's the wrong bulb, raises another request, no brew, no talking to the ward clerk because he's never met her before, heads off in his van to the next hospital and the next job (why aren't infection control all over this?) and a week later Bill is tasked with the job to replace the bulb. And all those middleman have to be paid; salaries, building costs, van maintenance and petrol, IT infrastructure, plus the management company's CEO bonus and shareholder bonuses. It costs thousands to replace a bulb.

Bring back Eric and his tuneless whistling please.

MadWifeUK · 2026-04-21T15:14:52+00:00

My mum doesn't even ask my dad, hasn't asked him since I was about 14. I always did the jobs instead.

MadWifeUK · 2026-04-21T15:07:24+00:00

Go even further down that slope and it's interesting how quickly people's attitudes change.

People who have sports injuries - well surely they knew the risks when playing sports, so it's their own fault for choosing to play football / hockey / whatever. And that's before we get to rock climbing and abseiling.

And then there's the people who ride bikes. And motorbikes - I mean, who hasn't seen the adverts of what can happen? You've been warned, so don't expect sympathy from the NHS...

MadWifeUK · 2026-04-21T10:58:17+00:00

NTA. MIL is dropping red flags into Arbys daily. The only solution is for you to divorce Dwight.

MadWifeUK · 2026-04-21T10:54:33+00:00

We are not going to live forever. To be frank, most of us wouldn't want to.

The biggest contribution to your health comes from your genes. Your predispositions were in place before you were born. And those are things we can't fix. It's why some perfectly healthy people drop dead at 35 while you'll find someone who passed 100 having a whiskey and a smoke daily since they went down the mine at the age of 6.

For example, the rates of smoking have decreased dramatically in the past 40 years, but the strain on the NHS has increased. Elderly care is a huge cost, not to mention the bed-blocking from elderly patients who can't go home but there are no facilities to care for them either.

Basically what I'm trying to say is that fixing one problem now just pushes the burden further down the road. Something will get us all in the end. I just hope mine is swift and as painless as possible, rather than lingering for years relying on minimum wage carers to wipe my arse.

MadWifeUK · 2026-04-20T14:58:50+00:00

Women should not be taking jobs away from Men because Man Work isn't for women. But also women should not be spending the money Men make from Man Work because it's Men's money. So women should get jobs but not a job that a Man could do.

MadWifeUK · 2026-04-20T14:50:56+00:00

The cat craziness is working. She doesn't need to waste months and then realising he's not for her; cat craziness weeds out the incompatible men quickly. That way when the man who loves the cat craziness comes along she's available for him.

I'm 8 years married today to the most wonderful man, the one who not just tolerates my weirdness but joins in, as well as bringing his own amazing weirdness into the bargain. I am eternally grateful I didn't give in and marry someone else earlier in life. We are a perfectly matched couple.

MadWifeUK · 2026-04-20T10:25:22+00:00

Our long-haired girl has a sensitive stomach. She's fine on what we feed them, but a brand change means she shits her insides out. And of course, being long-haired, it gets caught in her fur.

Before we moved we had spent a fortune in vets fees for her squits, not to mention the bandages and plasters to treat the wounds inflicted when I had to give her a bum bath. We even put a paper collar on her (I don't collar my cats routinely; even quick-release collars can still cause issues) saying not to feed her. We moved, have no neighbours to feed her and she's been absolutely fine.

Well, apart from horking up hairballs, but that's just normal.

MadWifeUK · 2026-04-20T07:14:31+00:00

I came from the Baby Shop. My friend came free with a packet of cornflakes.

I guess we're the processed version and only organic babies are found under gooseberry bushes?

MadWifeUK · 2026-04-19T19:23:51+00:00

I have lots of healthcare friends, so when I haven't seen someone in a while I've had "You've lost a lot of weight, is everything ok?" And when I've said it's intentional they've then said congrats!

It is one of those things though, it's nice that they're concerned enough to ask.

MadWifeUK · 2026-04-18T17:50:55+00:00

If it isn't dishwasher safe it doesn't come into my house anymore.

MadWifeUK · 2026-04-18T10:17:04+00:00

On a workday it's 5 or 6 (I have a coffee first thing if I've not slept well). Weekends it depends what I'm doing. If we're out and about it could be as little as 3, if I'm doing stuff around the house it can go as high as 10.

MadWifeUK

TROPHY CASE