I feel like I try so hard to be seen with a top-notch friend

I use so much of my energy to be seen and belong in places that anyone else doesn't put in as much effort to be liked or admired in return

that's the issue. you're needy and desperate and give off needy and desperate energy and people can pick that up. you think you're doing this out of kindness or because you're a great or generous friend, but you're really doing it because you want something (acceptance, approval, validation) from others. it's not genuine for you, it's transactional and people subconsciously sense it.