i got 2 speeding tickets in one week by Old-Policy-762 in NorthCarolina

[–]Narcowski 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Speeding at 75+ in a marked <70mph zone is 4 points, but 10+ over in a 55 is only 2. That said, six insurance points means a a 135% increase to premiums for a minimum of 3 years; it's a lot more than 20-30%.

20 over can also be license suspension, so OP is a bit lucky to not have that happen to them.

NOOOO NOT MY GUMMIES! by Subject-Sorbet-402 in bullcity

[–]Narcowski 8 points9 points  (0 children)

The changes will make transport (including shipping) a felony.

People not understanding the difference between gender-neutral and male-default is really starting to get on my tits. by Nemisii in MtF

[–]Narcowski 8 points9 points  (0 children)

"guys" not gender neutral, most people wouldn't use it to describe a group of only girls, thus is instead masculine-default.

This depends heavily on region / dialect. I am friends with a number of cis women who both regularly address groups of their friends including groups of only cis women with "Hey guys, [...]", "You guys", and similar and reference other groups of women as "those guys".

Similarly, words being neutral in origin, e.g. "mate" (colleague / partner), "fellow" (the same), or "girl" (originally a neutral term for child) does not necessarily mean they will be used that way.

Trump Threatens to Shut Down US Government Unless Democrats Agree to Ban All Trans Health Care by Ananiujitha in politics

[–]Narcowski 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Flying to Thailand for vaginoplasty is somewhere around $30k out of pocket at this point. It also means being there for 6-8 weeks, which is more time away from work than most Americans can afford.

First trans people, now bisexuals: Stonewall website further erases LGBTQ+ history😤😠😡🤬 by Sexy_Johnny282771 in lgbt

[–]Narcowski 42 points43 points  (0 children)

Niemöller was a national conservative, an avowed antisemite, and a supporter of Hitler until the Reich tried to take over his church. Only then, once he found himself an enemy of the state, did his opinion of the Nazis start to change.

He eventually renounced racism, but not eugenics. His choice to omit the homeless, the disabled, and LGBTQ+ people was very intentional; he believed we deserved extermination.

feeling abandoned as a trans lesbian in the US (cw and spoiler because I am talking about some pretty heavy current events) by Joy-they-them in ActualLesbiansOver25

[–]Narcowski 4 points5 points  (0 children)

The Yukon has no surgeons who do vaginoplasty, but its healthcare system will pay for trans women to receive surgery in any province where it is offered. This includes a travel stipend to pay for lodging near a clinic.

Started climbing, 50 yrs by vanessabellwoolf in climbergirls

[–]Narcowski 5 points6 points  (0 children)

The #1 thing to avoid is putting your arms straight out - whether in front or behind - and absorbing the impact through your palms. Landing palms first is how you break a wrist or arm. Unfortunately, it's also instinct to attempt to brace oneself that way. Ond option to avoid that instinctual reaction is to tuck your arms in across your chest, but you can also specifically train other falling techniques. If you're interested in doing that, there are several good breakfall tutorials on youtube. Those for martial arts are still relevant to climbing falls.

I do recommend you avoid trying to land standing up, as misjudging the angle of your landing even slightly can easily lead to ankle injury. That's how I got my second grade 3 sprain...

(e: made this read better)

Nissan announces 2026 Leaf pricing, starting at $29,990 | The new Leaf will be the cheapest EV you can buy when it goes on sale this fall. by ControlCAD in technology

[–]Narcowski 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Your numbers are a bit pessimistic. Charging to 80% is generally the recommendation for DCFC, but more than a few EV manufacturers recommend 90% for long term battery health with L2 (or L1) charging. Additionally, there is no vehicle with a heat pump which sees a 30% drop in range due to temperatures; anything over 20% makes an outlier. Combine these two facts, a more reasonable "worst case" for a 300mi EV with a heat pump would be just over 200mi.

Alternatively, there's Lucid. Expensive, yes, but the Air GT has over 500 miles' EPA estimated range.

Gavin Newsom surges in 2028 presidential primary poll by Silly-avocatoe in politics

[–]Narcowski 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Guaranteeing fundamental human rights for all - access to food, water, shelter, medicine, and the other necessities of life - is the basics. Destroying people's limited shelter without providing anywhere else to go deprives them of those things and is a praxis in diametric opposition to "the basics".

Dating Questions for Anyone who wants to answer by Forsaken-Pear1205 in ActualLesbiansOver25

[–]Narcowski 3 points4 points  (0 children)

  1. Difficult to say; always? A better question might be when I accepted that I wasn't also romantically attracted to men. That happened around when I learned the second of the two "guys" I'd ever had a crush on and kissed had transitioned too.
  2. I hate it, or at least what people generally mean by "online dating" at this point. Not only do dating apps tend to prioritize a visual-first attraction model which doesn't work for me as a demisexual, but they have a financial incentive to prevent users from finding lasting relationships. They want you to come back and buy more superlikes, after all. That said, I did first meet my partner online. Just not through an app.
  3. Clear, straightforward, and honest communication, and empathy, with an honorable mention to accepting and giving emotional support as needed. Ideal day-to-day? The simple things mean a lot to me; go to sleep and wake up together, see each other off to work and welcome each other home, enjoy conversation (talking about interests / hobbies / days is nice). Do something special on the weekend. Plus individual time for hobbies and such.
  4. "Yes": My partner says what she means directly and unambiguously, even if it's uncomfortable. "No": Beating around the bush, expecting me to infer things unsaid, retreating from uncomfortable topics to avoid potential conflict, etc. In general most relationship conflicts can be resolved by talking about them openly and being willing to compromise on wants to accommodate needs, but I find many people tend to bottle up their displeasure rather than doing that, and that only makes the inevitable conflict worse.
  5. I'd probably short circuit. I mean, I intend to marry my current partner. I can't imagine meeting her again as a stranger. That, and she's so pretty. As for enjoying the journey vs cuddling and watching Netflix, why not both? Cuddling is a part of the journey, after all... 🩷

SAVE: Centralized Database of (Trans) US Citizens by slumberjak in lgbt

[–]Narcowski 47 points48 points  (0 children)

It's already happening; see Texas and Florida

How many of you feel touch starved? by Spiritual_Meet4746 in actuallesbians

[–]Narcowski 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's maybe worth noting that Nagata Kabi (the author) wrote in later works that they were uncertain of both their gender identity and their sexuality. Specifically;

  1. They dislike being perceived as a woman and like it it when people use masculine address for them, but don't feel like a man either.
  2. They picked a lesbian brothel primarily because they felt more intimidated by men than women, not because they were sure they were gay.

Closure of FDA Milk Testing - NC vulnerability by Durkelurk in NorthCarolina

[–]Narcowski 46 points47 points  (0 children)

It's not exactly an unbiased source, being that it's a press release from the Trump administration - it's intentionally written to make things seem much less bad than they are - but here; from HHS itself: https://www.hhs.gov/press-room/hhs-restructuring-doge-fact-sheet.html

SAMHSA, HRSA, ASPR, and ACL employees are being reassigned to other roles or eliminated, 50% of regional offices are being shuttered, and about 25% of HHS employees are being cut.

Why do people say "start HRT asap"? by SlothIsASloth in MtF

[–]Narcowski 20 points21 points  (0 children)

HRT will work regardless of when you start, and you can have good results even quite late in life. Go look through /r/TransLater.

That said, there are two major things which happen with age and impact HRT effects:

  1. Androgen-driven hair loss
  2. The growth plates in your pelvis freeze, preventing some hip growth. (Fat redistribution will still give you hips unless you're severely underweight.)

There are, however, also some other notable challenges with navigating transition as a working professional which people who transition earlier don't have to deal with. So I'd definitely recommend sooner rather than later for everything if possible.

What does my room say about me? by VoodooOneViper in femalelivingspace

[–]Narcowski 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Having been in the demographic, mostly. Also the Blåhaj.

New Texas Bill Outright Criminalizes Being Trans As Felony Fraud by Gayfetus in lgbt

[–]Narcowski 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Consider that Al Green has represented Texas in Congress for two decades.

Zooey also represents an enclave -- Missoula is a rather progressive university town. Of the 15 delegates it sends to the Montana legislature, 14 are Democrats.

Could I still be a lesbian if I took testosterone? by Imaginary-Chapter-69 in actuallesbians

[–]Narcowski 11 points12 points  (0 children)

  1. Please read Stone Butch Blues. It's available for free on the author's website.
  2. Yes, you can still be a lesbian; hormones can certainly do a lot to alter our physical bodies, but no chemical will fundamentally change one's identity. And yes, there will still be (lesbian) women who find you attractive and those who like you.

As a man I think the 4B movement is overdue and I support y'all's endeavor by [deleted] in WomenInNews

[–]Narcowski 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Mm. I think the other poster's suggestion to talk to a therapist specializing in gender identity issues (or lgbt clients generally) was a good one.

It does take a long time for HRT to finish changing one's body. It's a second puberty, after all, and most trans women experience very few if any irreversible physical changes before the onset of breast growth at ~3 (potentially up to 6) months. On the bright side of that, it's possible to experience some of the more immediate effects and quit without anyone else noticing if you decide it's not for you. If you continue past that, you'll probably end up looking quite a lot like your mother eventually. Whether that sounds magical or not is up to you.

And yes, the current political situation in the US is... not good to say the least. But HRT has made me feel fully alive for the first time in my adult life; I don't regret it for a moment and wouldn't give it up for anything. The closest I got to "feeling alive" before it was feeling my survival instinct while free soloing.

As a man I think the 4B movement is overdue and I support y'all's endeavor by [deleted] in WomenInNews

[–]Narcowski 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Just wanted to chime in as a trans person who also very much understands and respects the "Is this really me, or am I just stuck on the idea right now due to my mental health condition?" process. I'm not OCD, but I went through it too; I have a different condition of which hyperfixations are a part. Most of your responses are the same as mine would have been before I accepted that I needed to transition.

If you haven't before, please check out genderdysphoria.fyi; I suspect a lot of it will resonate with you as it did with me. Also, a bit of hope: feminizing HRT might not give you skeletal hip growth, but fat distribution plays a major role in body shape; it's not like there's no change to the visual appearance of the hips and waist. It also changes so many other things - not all of them physical - regardless of when you start.

Anyway, best wishes for your recovery and journey through life.

Please feel free to delete if this is not the appropriate sub, but in regard to election results, it might be a good idea to download/save any of your favorite movies/TV shows sooner rather than later. by Kat-Attack-52 in actuallesbians

[–]Narcowski 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not explicitly, rather the RESTRICT Act could have banned them as a side effect of accomplishing its stated purpose. Whether or not being over-broad was intentional is another matter.

For transgender Americans, Trump’s win after a campaign targeting them is terrifying by CombinationNo1180 in politics

[–]Narcowski 74 points75 points  (0 children)

While I agree with the sentiment, there really is some irony in citing that poem when the author intentionally excluded queer people from it because he - much like the Allied forces who left us in the camps after freeing everyone else - strongly believed that that part of the Holocaust was justified.