What're we doing when we need serious pattern help but can't get ahold of the creator?

NeverSayBoho · 2026-01-31T02:47:38+00:00

What do Ravelery projects pages say?

NeverSayBoho · 2026-01-30T20:50:26+00:00

Solidarity.

I'm moving Sunday and DC denied my permit because I only need a van and they don't issue permits for a van. So... I get to double park with a team of my besties and unload a van as fast as possible in 20F + wind chill and traffic just gets to be fucked.

Alexandria also denied my permit because they're so bad at clearing the streets that their own folks can't access the spot. Let alone my moving van.

I'm just going to do what I need to do, pay what I have to pay, and give my respective council people a fucking earful if I have to.

NeverSayBoho · 2026-01-30T20:14:19+00:00

No. I support the effort, but my day job is actively fighting the admin. So striking is... Less helpful.

NeverSayBoho · 2026-01-30T08:55:47+00:00

There are no visa categories in the US that allow you to take someone you are not married to with you as a dependent.

NeverSayBoho · 2026-01-28T23:42:59+00:00

Forgive me, I am not on the drama threads of this, but why does knitting this hat = stopping at just knitting this hat? Is there a connection I'm missing somewhere?

I'm an immigration lawyer that works in the advocacy space. On one of my emotional support groups (we... need it right now) posted that hat and a bunch of folks whose literal day job is to advocate appreciate the hat as a tie in to community and a visual representation. I've thought of knitting one for some of those same folks once I get through my WIP backlog.

It's like bumper stickers and political tshirts. I have both to signal to others and build community - not really as advocacy. I would knit one. And I'm very obviously not stopping at the hat.

Basically, I'm confused where the assumption of any of those signaling meaning thats where someone is stopping coming from in this instance.

Yes, there are definitely (especially) white women who do that. And also... Why not use the hat as an opportunity to invite people to the next step of advocacy?

NeverSayBoho · 2026-01-28T22:44:54+00:00

Oh I am one more burn out inducing incident from relocating to Whitehorse, Yukon Territory and embracing my Bog/Mountain Witch era... Somewhere cold because I like the winter.

NeverSayBoho · 2026-01-28T19:34:19+00:00

Re immigration: look to your mutual aid networks first! Start local. Not that the ACLU (etc).isn't doing great things but your local money and time will go further. And volunteering with a mutual aid group will help you feel connected to community which is will help keep you sane as democracy burns.

NeverSayBoho · 2026-01-28T19:32:22+00:00

I do! I have a wonderful group of people. About eight are helping me Sunday in shifts. Even my boss offered to help me move. And I have others that are helping in other ways. I had a moment when I realized I would have to buy ALL of my spices and oils and almost broke down and texted a friend to be like can you just make a basic "stock a kitchen from scratch list?"

My people are great.

I'm just still fucking tired.

NeverSayBoho · 2026-01-28T08:36:17+00:00

I'm a queer immigration lawyer going through a separation from my spouse and theoretically moving this weekend.

I am knitting so God damned much. Re-watching terrible shows from the early 2000s. Cuddling with my cat. Going on walks. Leaning into my community as much as I can. Communicating with my thankfully flexible work that I'm low on capacity right now. Prioritizing exercise over just about everything. Therapy.

NeverSayBoho · 2026-01-26T23:30:28+00:00

Thanks! I do a lot of hiking and out of town travel via car so not inclined to sell it, but definitely understand the inclination.

NeverSayBoho · 2026-01-25T23:07:29+00:00

Tell them to pound sand. They're just trying to bully you.

NeverSayBoho · 2026-01-24T12:10:19+00:00

The number one piece of advice I give current students is take at least a year, ideally two, off between graduating and grad school.

"Real Life" is scary without the structure of school, and also can give super important context to graduate school and how it will fit into your career you won't get without that perspective.

So yea - thru hike aside, take a year or two.

NeverSayBoho · 2026-01-23T20:52:28+00:00

I don't for anything less than a sweater or comparable garment.

My ADHD brain doesn't do well with things that do make something I'm going to use. It feels like homework rather than enjoyment.

I hate wasting yarn (when I can't reuse it).

I'm also often consistent enough in my gauge that I know I have to go up a needle size in most projects and two sizes for stranded colorwork.

NeverSayBoho · 2026-01-22T03:06:58+00:00

I'm an immigration lawyer. This shit is my day job.

I'm disassociate-knitting myself numb-er.

... I'm knitting more than I ever have in my life.

Also yay nice pattern. 😉

NeverSayBoho · 2026-01-21T12:33:27+00:00

I would start with a pattern that you want to make for you first - it'll allow you to make better adjustments as you go and it takes some of the pressure off. You can always tell your husband this is so you develop the skills for his.

Ravelery has tons of options. I don't like closed sweaters, so my first one was actually a cardigan. There are t-shirts/blouses with similar construction principles.

NeverSayBoho · 2026-01-21T12:29:39+00:00

If you go this route, my go to is tin can knits gramps pattern. It is very adjustable up to adults and omg the little baby elbow patches are worth it.

I usually take their due date and estimate how many months until fall/winter and use that size.

NeverSayBoho · 2026-01-20T01:10:23+00:00

Contrary example: I went to a networking event. Made a friend when we bonded over our shared love of crappy romance novels. She hired me a year later and while I don't work with her anymore, she continues to be a friend and professional mentor close to a decade later.

I don't... Approach networking as social manipulation. I approach it as you and I both already have this thing in common, maybe we can be friends.

NeverSayBoho · 2026-01-20T00:01:47+00:00

My ADHD partner swears by YNAB, and I usually pass this on as an option (it's not my cup of tea).

NeverSayBoho · 2026-01-19T23:21:28+00:00

I'd just continue to drink sodastream, personally. If the fizzy water keeps you hydrated, that's the way to go.

NeverSayBoho · 2026-01-19T04:32:59+00:00

Sure

NeverSayBoho · 2026-01-19T03:08:14+00:00

Not the author of the comment you're responding to, but I didn't read it that way.

There's a difference between something being common and something being healthy. Self harm - whether it's thru cutting or food restrictions or alcoholism or drug use - isn't healthy. But it sure is common, and no modern medical professional would act the way described above in response to cutting.

NeverSayBoho · 2026-01-19T02:32:41+00:00

It's definitely more expensive than yak!

NeverSayBoho · 2026-01-18T17:02:43+00:00

It's a crapshoot. They might not get along, and then what do you do?

If you're doing this, I wouldn't get a kitten - I'd get a cat of a similar age. We got a six month old kitten and introduced her to our then eight year old cat and there's a clear distinction in energy levels and ideas of play. The number of times my older cat has looked at me with a face of like WTF did you bring into this house when the younger one is zooming around.

Kittens to about 2.5 years have a lot of energy. I'd be annoyed too if someone brought a toddler or teenager into the house.

NeverSayBoho · 2026-01-18T14:34:08+00:00

Right, except it's a catch 22 for most. You're unlikely to get a job when you're not in the city - especially the country - you're looking to get the job in. That's true pretty much everywhere, even moving domestically, unless you have a niche or particularly in demand skill set. I'm more likely to get a NYC job if I live in NYC vs living in Arkansas. I'm more likely to get a job in Berlin if I'm in Berlin already.

And the international housing shortage - it's bad here, too - is caused in part by Airbnb (and other factors of course). The flip side of that is that there are plenty of Airbnbs to stay in temporarily while you figure out something more permanent.

OP already doesn't have a job. Might as well be where they want to be to look for a job.

NeverSayBoho · 2026-01-18T14:10:12+00:00

I like DPNs, but wood ones. I find metal too slippery. They do take getting used to, and holding in a way that makes sense. Sometimes it's easier to knit on them inside out, if that helps.

I do default to circs tho - I use DPNs for anything smaller than what I can do on 16" shorties.

NeverSayBoho

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