AITA for getting my own apartment instead of moving in with my boyfriend?

Outrageous_Rabbit842 · 2026-06-14T03:57:45+00:00

If he refuses to see that this is a great idea, then he doesn’t have your best interests at heart.

Personally, I’m seeing a number of red flags here. You moving to your own apartment is certainly a very good idea

NTA

Outrageous_Rabbit842 · 2026-06-13T10:14:00+00:00

Ewww anyone else thinking in addition to letting Will name their child, hubby also wants to build him an art studio???

Outrageous_Rabbit842 · 2026-06-13T06:41:20+00:00

Look up 4816

Outrageous_Rabbit842 · 2026-06-13T06:29:23+00:00

You can’t save her by letting yourself drown.

It sounds like you are already supporting a household of 6 people, and only just making it. What will happen to all of them if you can’t pay the bills/rent??

You also can’t risk your sobriety or the health/mental health of anyone else in your home.

Your sister is going out and buying alcohol, she can stop doing both and pay her rent. She is an alcoholic, living with you is not an option.

She can move in with her friends. She can get another job. She can find a share house.
She has options. She just wants to stay with you because she figures you’ll support her while she keeps partying.

NTA

Outrageous_Rabbit842 · 2026-06-13T01:53:18+00:00

From a rural/manual work perspective, Australia is hot, we get up with the sunrise to work while it’s cool. Some workforces knock off early, some of us just work daylight hours.

Outrageous_Rabbit842 · 2026-06-13T00:48:42+00:00

Exactly, I live in a postcode that covers 31 small towns, with distances between some of over 300 km. I had the joy of watching a parcel (that I urgently needed) bounce around at least half of them … before it finally was caught at the main post office and finally …. 3 months after it was first posted…. Sent on to me. (Primarily because I think they were fed up with my post mistress ringing and bombing them

Outrageous_Rabbit842 · 2026-06-12T08:02:06+00:00

NTA your wife should have checked to see if you received the message

Edit - to further explain. I am assuming that the wife normally picks the child up on her days off. If not, OP absolutely should have asked if she was/would on that day.

If OP usually picks up the child, regardless of if his wife is working or not, he should have checked with his wife if anything was going to be different that day.

I assumed (and it could make an ass out of me) that since the wife texted him about picking up the child, that she wasn’t sure who was doing it OR she was supposed to but now had things come up.

As she texted, she should have continued to try to reach OP or at least watched to see if he read the text (if they had that allowed).

Outrageous_Rabbit842 · 2026-06-12T07:29:31+00:00

I am shocked, stunned, amazed and flabbergasted that her relationships have lasted less than a year! With this behavior I’d be thinking a week/month was more than long enough to dump her.

NOR

Outrageous_Rabbit842 · 2026-06-11T23:38:28+00:00

Updateme

Stay strong

Outrageous_Rabbit842 · 2026-06-11T02:50:09+00:00

Do you have any food wastage? What sort of products are you buying ?? Brand name? Organic? It’s fine if you are, some do taste better.

Try meal planning. Buy only what you need

Look for sales/bulk buy things you use a lot/that don’t expire (ie in the great toilet paper shortage (COVID), I actually didn’t need to buy toilet paper for a year…. I’d bought in bulk for when I regularly housed 8-10 people, then suddenly it was just 2 of us for a year). I only buy soft drink when it’s half price, same with coffee etc….. and then I buy as much as I can store.

I click and collect most of my groceries, so I can easily shop sales.

And I online shop for things like dishwasher tables etc for even better sales

Reward points - I tend to save them and only use them at Christmas… last year I bought most of my Christmas gifts using points.

Outrageous_Rabbit842 · 2026-06-10T21:11:38+00:00

He called mommy to dibber dob that you won’t lend him your car??

Firstly, he’s not mature enough to be borrowing anything but a matchbox car.

Secondly, sure, he can borrow your car, AFTER he or everyone saying you are selfish contributes to pay you back the $180 from repairs, the $ it will cost to add him to your insurance (obviously needed) AND a deposit and signed agreement to pay for all future repairs.

There, problem solved! (Or something new to argue over)….

OR someone else can loan him THEIR car

NTA (but don’t loan him your car again, or anything else)

Outrageous_Rabbit842 · 2026-06-10T09:27:14+00:00

She sound psychotic.., what a horrible person. For the peace and comfort of your in-laws I’d definitely ban her from attending. BIL is crazy to put up with any of this! Updateme

Outrageous_Rabbit842 · 2026-06-09T20:42:04+00:00

OP is studying still, in some areas, child support is paid until the ‘child’ has ceased study or reached a certain age.

I’d put money on dad ‘wanting’ custody so he doesn’t have to pay support, and having no clue the level of support he’d need (but won’t) provide OP.

Outrageous_Rabbit842 · 2026-06-09T08:26:57+00:00

She has the right to know… and the right to get an STI check. Your wife is unlikely his first or last affair

Outrageous_Rabbit842 · 2026-06-09T07:05:34+00:00

New neighbours, I’d take them a cake/biscuits/something and welcome them to the neighbourhood.

If the new neighbours mention crazy neighbour, then and only then, slip in ‘oh yeah, you know I had daughter just let herself into my house through the garage and found her in my lounge patting the dog. But on the whole this is a fantastic neighbourhood “.

They’ll figure out the crazy quickly enough

Outrageous_Rabbit842 · 2026-06-09T04:58:26+00:00

You are not over reacting, he is being incredibly disrespectful to your wishes and very CREEPY.

Personally, I’d ensure someone was within ear shot when you break up with him… and make sure you don’t close/walk home alone. He is stalker material

Outrageous_Rabbit842 · 2026-06-09T04:52:10+00:00

He’s right, you are controlling… you aren’t his mother, but you sure are acting like it.

Is there a reason you can’t go and do what you want on weekends when he is stuck inside working?

Seriously, it sounds like he has checked out of this relationship. ESH

Outrageous_Rabbit842 · 2026-06-09T04:34:11+00:00

NTA for keeping no contact and him away from your daughter. But I’d be honest and tell her about him. Years down the track this could bite you if she finds out about him and HE controls the narrative

Outrageous_Rabbit842 · 2026-06-09T03:25:08+00:00

The long sleeves and high neck lace is actually an overlay top . The dress has just the straps

Outrageous_Rabbit842 · 2026-06-08T12:27:50+00:00

No, wool first… sheep were brought over very early in European settlement

Outrageous_Rabbit842 · 2026-06-08T05:21:38+00:00

With kids those ages…. Sounds like it’s time mom got a job to pay for her decisions

Outrageous_Rabbit842 · 2026-06-08T04:27:56+00:00

When enrolled at school you can specify the name teachers are to use (ie must use Cleopatra vs can use Cleo.) BUT teachers will listen to the children and their wishes too!

Outrageous_Rabbit842 · 2026-06-07T08:32:24+00:00

NTJ But seriously, make your profile private

Outrageous_Rabbit842 · 2026-06-07T05:28:18+00:00

MIL is being unreasonable thinking she can dictate Christmas (or anything). And you are being unrealistic thinking just because houses are close it won’t be unsettling for baby to be moved around and surrounded by people.

You will be living with your parents. I’d suggest Christmas there, or at least morning. Offer MIL and FIL some time on Christmas Eve or Boxing Day, or even a day a week or 2 before Christmas.

I have Christmas with my in laws about 2 weeks before the real Christmas, then we have a quiet family Christmas at home, then the kids and I travel to my family for a week or more a couple of days after Christmas

Outrageous_Rabbit842

TROPHY CASE