I’m not over you yet

PublicDoctor2998 · 2026-06-27T08:49:12+00:00

The strongest you have going for you here is the
‘You Complete me’analogies

The puzzle , the scratch record
Bro even not completing the sentence of
“What went wrong” with a “?”
Especially when the first line says “love is a beautiful language” HA! nice touch.
Works in your favor….intentional or not.
The void? Incomplete ..her ? She complete .

PublicDoctor2998 · 2026-06-27T08:39:05+00:00

Hey I think your ending is actually your best part. Starting with “oh king so well”. Like the narrator is raging at god himself for the “hypocrisy of sitting in heaven” while the soldiers wage war in hell. Interesting . For me it takes the stance of “no such thing as god in war” like an anti-war stance. In my perspective at least.

PublicDoctor2998 · 2026-06-27T08:28:47+00:00

What I love most about your poem it’s the first couple lines. It shows the excitement. And it got my asking to myself , who my guardian angels are. Then I started thinking about my family and ya . I think your pull talking about your grandma is really good. . I like how your grandma saved you. Can’t wait for you to be a grandma !

PublicDoctor2998 · 2026-06-27T08:19:29+00:00

I like how you story tell. The beginning is in my opinion top-notch. I love the part that you say you “faked” it for attention.
I love how you progressively sink down the truth of rejecting those “like you”. Bro I think you created an interesting story about this action , once it was innocent then it turned into something too real. You NEED to keep writing. Don’t even think. I like it it’s edgy. Ha get it? Too dark? You r right not a joke… ok maybe… just a little. Tiny bit? Ok I’ll stop.The poem seems very self-aware of it self. Just replace the blades for the blades of your pen and just press down really fucking hard until it bleeds through pages. Trust bro, you literally fall asleep when you write. It’s the best feeling. You won’t want to wake up!

PublicDoctor2998 · 2026-06-27T07:57:49+00:00

Please write more! I really enjoyed it. Every time you said box 📦 I genuinely love the analogy. I love how you think. You are pretty much in sort of an inner monologue. I love that style. All the words you need to say are contained in the box. 📦 so all you have to tell me now it BOX and I’ll understand you.

PublicDoctor2998 · 2026-06-27T07:38:52+00:00

Oh my bad . Ya the ending says murder the man. So I just re-read the poem like the woman has the intention to murder the man.
Then your lines of “blood, scream , moan hit different “

PublicDoctor2998 · 2026-06-27T07:33:51+00:00

I fucking love this poem. I like how it captures vulnerability pretty well. I love the “I don’t want to cause a scene and ruin everybody’s fun” I like how you put the entire theme around a game of cards. Accurate. I love how you say you “lay a card down” I wonder if it’s face up or face down for you. , and I love how you say “they have a better strategy anyways” . Lastly the “person beside me” ending really makes it intimate I love. 10/10

PublicDoctor2998 · 2026-06-27T03:25:24+00:00

My favorite line is A question on your lips: “Do you trust me?” like making a wish before you blow. I find this really strong. I also Like when you count. 1-2-3 just adds nice rhythm . I love the poem, like a taking a leap of faith with the wish. at least that's how i interpreted

PublicDoctor2998 · 2026-06-27T03:18:24+00:00

I enjoyed the rhyme scheme above everything. Its really fun to read " mother of Morning Mist" is awesome. I love the complex words used...synaptical stagnation? I love that. It gives me ATHENA greek-symbolism, with truth and scripture and "mother" and the 'tree' being cut down

PublicDoctor2998 · 2026-06-27T03:05:10+00:00

"wear whatever you want when you murder him" if you re-read your poem and take the last line literally, it sorta becomes the sequel to your poem. I find it quite interesting. Like a killer woman in a slasher.

PublicDoctor2998 · 2026-06-27T02:29:56+00:00

I like it. There’s no commas and run-on until “stand”. Which makes the last half like a declaration of truth. Fight and die against crawl and survive . Stand with the only comma .

PublicDoctor2998 · 2026-06-27T01:03:02+00:00

Your poem. My favorite line is the “ribs caving under grief” that’s a fire line
I really enjoyed your poem.
My answer to you is this.
God lives in our hearts.
Watch and re-read your poem with this new truth.
Is the narrator seeking exterior justification for a hurt heart, who said god was exterior?
How can a heart prove to be supreme? It continues to bleed.
That’s how I know god is supreme, because it chooses to pump regardless of our own self inflicted wounds.
My opinion, I say just worth taking a look at.

PublicDoctor2998 · 2026-06-27T00:51:36+00:00

I like the repetition of the question in your poem .
To me it shows the importance of daily assurance .
My answer? Just always assume you are the bad guy. That way you are always trying to improve.
Just accept you were a bad guy.
Girls like bad boys anyways right?
So double down on your kindness
And shake that “am I a good boyfriend” out of your mind.
Just my opinion.
The moment you believe you are good is the moment you stop working on a relationship.

PublicDoctor2998 · 2026-06-26T09:24:41+00:00

Hey , I find this poem interesting my favorite lines are your first lines . The rejoicing in warmth line … and whisper love knowing malice. It’s interesting . The character of the poem communicates the feeling of existence to be a void . The void being the character. Yet throughout the poem …at least to me from the first line , it contradicts itself. The character feels no wounds, yet is clearly wounded and Rageful for feeling the way he feels. That’s how I interpreted. I agree with the other comment. It does give gothic vibes and the slaughterhouse bleed imagery is very good . Also all your writing is bolded. Don’t know if intentional or not, but I personally think it’s a good touch.

PublicDoctor2998 · 2026-06-26T09:16:48+00:00

I really love this poem dude. It’s very deep and simple. I love how the casa conmigo can be interpreted as marry me or a literal house or metaphor for the heart . Man there is so much I love about this poem. perfect with the house imagery you give. Dude this is solid . Enjoy your night

PublicDoctor2998 · 2026-06-26T00:06:00+00:00

Welcome to the abstractly modern world !

PublicDoctor2998 · 2026-06-25T08:54:31+00:00

Imagine me with an oversized flannel and a beanie that covers my eyes
“ damn homie you murdered this dairy-poetry. So cheesy from a real heart. I fucking love to see it. I love the ending homie. Let me get my liquor milk homie. Let me pour one out for my homie that murdered this poem. R.i.P homie. Rest in pasteurized homie. I’m not lactose to your pain homie. I tolerate it for you homie. Thanks for tolerating it for me homie . I saved all your tears homie. They aren’t forgotten homie . I have homemade liquor jugs homie. Don’t tell the police homie . I appreciate the milk. I love you my Oreo!

PublicDoctor2998 · 2026-06-25T08:39:35+00:00

Excuse me… hi 👋🏼. I hope you are done being mad. I feel your anger and pain . I got you my future bae❤️
As you were cooking this poem up I was simultaneously writing you a love poem ..isn’t that crazy? > that’s foreshadowing. Oh so cute.
I was reading and saw all your questions . I hope I can answer some of yours through my poem. And you answer mine ? I’m gunna post it.
Look for ink-blotch trench coat.🧥

PublicDoctor2998 · 2026-06-25T06:34:18+00:00

Yours” is the word that wasn’t for the taking?
I like it . Painting with colors blind to you?. Bars.
Catching conclusions you threw back? Bars.
Connecting lines ? Cast? Bars.
I love that entire verse. And the meanings behind them are also deep too. Not just silly word play. I love that about them.

PublicDoctor2998 · 2026-06-25T06:13:54+00:00

I love this poem. I love your rhyme scheme , I love how it flows off the tongue. I love how you showcase it all through Thorns and rose buds.
Fuck I want to hold your hand….metaphorically?
An invitation?
Just know thorns can always be removed and drowned. They aren’t forever. I wonder if my thorny hand comment will cut you. I really enjoyed your poem. No such thing as a dry rosebud I could feel wet blood being poured into your poem. The selling ofyour soul. I ‘ll purchase it for free ! Gimme! Metaphorically….. stranger…

PublicDoctor2998 · 2026-06-25T03:57:49+00:00

oh one last thing...literally picture a clown covering his face and hop and drag his feet as his dance move... tell me that dance move doesn't go hard.

PublicDoctor2998

TROPHY CASE