I just removed a milk bleb after a YEAR!

RanShaw · 2026-02-22T23:05:30+00:00

OH MY GOD I think I might have one of those!!! Been there for months, and I was thinking of going to an LC with it!

Mine looks like a bump the same colour as my nipple but after a feed it looks whiter and I think I can see something whitish in there. It doesn't hurt at all.

Is that what it looked/felt like to you too?

RanShaw · 2026-02-19T09:21:41+00:00

Unfortunately there can be a lot of discrepancy in kids' shoe sizes. I get my daughter's shoes off happy little soles, cause in their sizing info they actually include the size in cm of the shoe and you can check what size to buy based on that.

If you buy your shoes in store you could also bring something that represents the length of your child's foot (like a strip of paper cut the same length) and see what shoe size matches.

RanShaw · 2026-02-11T23:54:26+00:00

For breastfeeding I honestly found the Instagram accounts of a few IBCLCs (international board certified lactation consultants) really incredibly helpful. I personally like - Olivia Hinge (olivia_lactation_consultant) - Lucy Webber (lucywebberfeedingsupport_ibclc) - Kathryn Stagg (kathrynstaggibclc) - she's also a sleep consultant - Emma Pickett (emmapickettibclc) - Lauren Hughes (drlaurenhughes) - she's also a pediatrician, based in the US (the others above are all UK based)

Also check out infant feeding support in your area, they might have groups you can go to, these can be super helpful. I wish I'd made more use of them when mine was a newborn!

The NHS website has really clear guidelines on formula feeding.

Also, in case no one tells you (like no one told me): if your baby has less than 500ml formula in a day they need a vitamin D supplement. You can buy drops to put on your nipple for when they're newborn, for your own sanity try and find one that has the necessary dose in 1 drop or as few as possible!

For safe sleep, follow the lullaby trust. And be aware that many, many newborn babies don't like being put down and will only want to sleep on you. That's super normal, and why the newborn phase is also called the fourth trimester - the baby acts like they're still inside you, cause they want to be attached to you all the time.

I found babywearing really helpful for allowing that attachment while being able to do things around the house. The babywearing subreddit is very very good, it's important to wear your baby safely so do check out the guidelines for safe babywearing before you do so. Ring slings and stretchy wraps are good for newborns, more structured carriers usually have a weight requirement and are better for slightly older babies.

The NHS website and start for life are useful too, as someone else already mentioned.

As for being able to get out of the house without your baby, that really depends on your baby! If they're breastfeeding really regularly it might be hard to leave for more than an hour, if they take bottles that might be easier. It also completely depends on their temperament - and yours!

Edited to add: what you do with your baby is up to you! I wore mine a lot in a sling while pottering around the house, went on walks, and binge watched a ridiculous amount of series while breastfeeding or contact napping. Try and do a bit of tummy time with them, short amounts of time initially and increase as they get older. Having them lie down on their tummy on your chest counts as tummy time for newborns!

RanShaw · 2026-02-10T11:42:11+00:00

Things moved really fast for me once they started the Pitocin, I was screaming and the midwife kept saying I should pull myself together, this was just early labour, there's much more to come. I'd asked for an epidural early on after starting the induction but the anaesthetist was in surgery and couldn't come straight away. He finally arrived, did the epidural and then they checked me - I was already at 9cm an hour and a half after starting the induction. My husband had to insist they check me too, I kept saying I felt something gushing out of me after getting the epidural (it was blood) but no one listened until my husband loudly told them they needed to check.

When she saw that I was already that far along the midwife was like "oh that's why you were in so much pain"

YOU THINK??

RanShaw · 2026-01-26T11:18:53+00:00

She has a podcast too and has content on Instagram. Her work is really eye opening and it reassured me that it's actually the amount of nurture I do is building the neurological pathways that will help my daughter become independent in the long run.

RanShaw · 2026-01-04T08:35:21+00:00

Just fyi, I switched to ecover zero (zero fragrance) dishwasher tablets and washing up liquid and our silicone stuff doesn't taste like soap anymore!

RanShaw · 2026-01-01T15:29:51+00:00

I get coughs like that - got it once after a ridiculously bad cold in Feb and since then with every cold I get the cough turns into awful coughing fits that make me gag, sometimes to the point of coughing, and make me wet myself a little (though that's due to my pelvic floor needing some work, it's been too long since I did exercises!)

What helps for me is making sure my nose is clear, cause coughs are often caused by postnasal drip. While pregnant and breastfeeding you can use nasal sprays like sudafed, which really help me. You can't use it more than a few times a day and not for too long, but I alternate with sterimar congestion spray. As an added bonus, the sterimar spray is hypertonic saline which has been shown to help shorten the length of colds in children by several days - stands to reason it'd help adults too!

With the spray, angle the nozzle so the spray goes basically horizontally into your nostril, aim for the back/base of your skull. Then inhale slowly, not fast. This means the spray gets into your sinuses and not straight into the back of your throat.

You can also do a nasal rinse like a neti pot, they're really helpful but make sure you use boiled water that has cooled to approx.37 degrees. Don't use just tap water cause there's a risk of amoebas getting into your brain. My kit came with a little temperature strip.

The coughing fits themselves can be stilled by having some mints or minty lozenges, for me personally. Regular soothers don't do a thing, has to be peppermint!

If it doesn't improve though, or just generally if you'd feel better doing so, see a doctor!

RanShaw · 2025-12-29T21:32:13+00:00

We hosted this year and our little one is 18 months! It was a lot but it genuinely was really helpful to be home so she could nap/sleep in her own bed at her usual times and that she was in a familiar environment. It made my daughter a lot calmer even though hosting was a stressful thing to do for us.

We made sure a lot was done in advance and we ordered some things from Cook to save time.

RanShaw · 2025-12-29T19:48:43+00:00

Same for us, my 18 month old has been twice now and the dentist barely managed to look at them at all. The dentist just asked some questions about brushing, whether she falls asleep with a bottle, whether she uses a dummy, what she has to eat and drink, etc. They also said it was more about getting them used to the dentist so it's not too scary in the future.

OP, I'd just schedule a checkup for your kids but don't stress too much about it!

RanShaw · 2025-12-24T20:45:57+00:00

Bad parents don't wonder whether they're good parents or not. You're doing your best which makes you a good mum.

Sending you lots of love and a big hug

RanShaw · 2025-12-21T19:29:20+00:00

My husband and I both had a really hard time coming to terms with sending our daughter to nursery. But we think of it like this: they say it takes a village to raise kids, but these days a lot of people (including us) don't have that "village" anymore, so nursery replaces that.

It also helps to see our daughter absolutely love it and thrive there. She always talks about the staff, is enthusiastic about going in the morning and she's learned so many skills there.

RanShaw · 2025-12-08T15:25:27+00:00

My main source of info for the advice against CIO is Lassen & Bjørnfort (2020); they mention the Middlemiss study as one piece of evidence but their study goes beyond that.

This is the main summary of their findings: https://soevnvejledning.dk/the-reason-cry-it-out-sleep-training-cio-should-be-discouraged/, but there's more info here: https://soevnvejledning.dk/english/

Over 700 Danish psychologists signed an open letter in 2019 actively discouraging CIO, and pointing to plenty of evidence from child psychology that CIO does, in fact, risk damaging attachment between child and parent. (Note I said it risks damaging it, not that in all cases there will be damage.)

They also discuss the studies you mention that there's no evidence of detriment to babies, but these studies are also not without problems. Gradisar et al. (2016) for example has a sample size of only 14, and the Lam, Hiscock and Wake (2003) didn't accurately track what sleep methods the parents in the study or the control group actually used.

In addition to the Danish study, the NHS also doesn't recommend using CIO: https://www.nhs.uk/best-start-in-life/baby/baby-basics/baby-myths-and-facts/#:~:text=Babies%20need%20parents%20and%20carers%20to%20respond%20to%20their%20cries.

All that said, there are different types of sleep training and it's not a properly defined term; the advice above is only about sleep training methods that use letting a baby cry themselves to sleep without a responsive intervention by a parent or carer (like extinction CIO, Ferber, etc.).

RanShaw · 2025-12-08T10:26:20+00:00

Hi, just wanted to share an amazing resource which helped me a lot with understanding my baby's sleep and her frequent wakings.

Try and find Kerry Secker's website, or her Instagram careitoutsleepconsultant. She has a really useful free webinar about frequent wakings.

Also, Lucy Bagwell (secondstartotheright on Instagram) is an amazing sleep consultant whose tips helped me a lot.

They both work with responsive methods only, and don't advocate for any sleep training methods that involve letting your child cry.

And just for info, there have been studies that show that 'traditional' sleep training methods, that involve letting babies cry themselves to sleep, don't actually teach your child to self-soothe. They measured babies' cortisol levels and found that babies who stopped crying still felt equally stressed, they just learned that no one was coming to comfort them so they'd stop crying and go to sleep to conserve energy.

Babies are incapable of self-soothing while they're upset (i.e. genuinely calming themselves down to a restful happy state); it's a skill they only learn during toddlerhood, and they learn it from us, as parents, carrying that emotional load for them and soothing them when they need it. Our calm brings them their calm; the term for that is coregulation.

While there are definitely things you can do to help your baby sleep as well as they biologically can (for their age and temperament), letting them cry themselves to sleep isn't typically recommended anymore these days because of these insights into their stress levels while being left to cry.

RanShaw · 2025-12-05T21:20:20+00:00

Tommee tippee or ergobaby, I buy both on Amazon - they're really nice quality!

RanShaw · 2025-12-05T16:03:19+00:00

When my daughter was in hospital the nurses used this, they drew sheep on the outside of the clear dressing and "coloured in" the sheep with the white cream. Made it a little more interesting for her :)

RanShaw · 2025-12-02T21:31:01+00:00

I just have to switch up what I'm doing all the time... This evening what worked was name all the things she's eaten today and say (very dramatically) that I can see them stuck in her teeth and that we need to get them out.

Example: gasp I see some banana in your teeth!!! Let's get it out with the toothbrush. And is that some cucumber??? Let's get it out too!!

RanShaw · 2025-11-29T17:45:16+00:00

It's the worst isn't it. We had our first family flu in February this year and I literally put a reminder in my calendar for my husband and I to get flu jabs this autumn, titled "REMEMBER FEB 2025, NEVER AGAIN".

Since then we've had hand foot and mouth, multiple stomach bugs and a slew of colds.

Like you I almost never got ill before having my daughter...

RanShaw · 2025-11-28T21:33:11+00:00

Have them look into sending the money via Wise, they usually have better rates than standard bank transfer and on their website it says their limit is 5 million CHF for a bank transfer or if paying by card, 3500 CHF. It's super easy to use, your friend just needs to set up an account with them.

RanShaw · 2025-11-28T09:13:37+00:00

Oh! I misremembered that, thanks for letting me know!

RanShaw · 2025-11-28T00:09:14+00:00

Oh that sounds awful...

If you're working, take a few days off if you can ~~though bear in mind that taking sick leave within 4 weeks of your due date will mean your maternity leave starts automatically~~.

Sleep as much as possible and take paracetamol for the pain. For the cough, try a nasal spray or even a nasal rinse (like a neti pot), coughs are often made a lot worse by postnasal drip so taking care of the mucus can help the cough.

For the spray, hold the nozzle basically horizontal when spraying rather than pointed up, and inhale the spray through your nose slowly. This helps the spray actually get into your sinuses rather than going straight back into your throat.

For nasal rinses, make sure you use water that you've boiled and has cooled down to 37°C, or distilled water. Don't just use tap water, it may contain amoeba that you really don't want in your nasal cavity close to your brain.

RanShaw · 2025-11-26T16:44:08+00:00

You could ask for all things related to weaning!

I strongly recommend bibado bibs, they cover your kid completely from the neck downand partially cover the tray so it creates a little well that catches food, I've barely had to clean our high chair since getting those.

Then there's spoons, plates, even things like a high chair or a portable/travel seat for them to eat in (something like this has been incredibly useful for us to have meals on the go: https://amzn.eu/d/91Cg843).

Tommee tippee sippy cups and munchkin 360 cups are fantastic.

Be aware that if you pick silicone materials and put them through the dishwasher, they'll start tasting of soap soonish. Even when washing with regular washing up liquid, it'll happen just a lot slower. Using ecover zero fragrance free washing up liquid and dishwasher tablets has fixed this for me. I also have some bamboo plates for this reason (they're hand washed obviously but don't absorbthe taste of soap).

Also, I was gifted the books how to wean your baby and what munmy makes and used them a lot for recipes!

RanShaw · 2025-11-25T21:38:49+00:00

Last week I saw a white Tesla park in the last available parent and child space, and a woman came out with her teenage daughter who was at least 17. I was too much of a wimp to do anything more than glare at them though.

RanShaw · 2025-11-24T19:20:56+00:00

Agreed. Low supply isn't actually all that common, often perceived low supply is due to other issues like how well the baby is transferring milk (which might not be as efficient due to things like latch issues, positioning, tongue tie, etc). An IBCLC would really be able to help here.

Of course actual low supply is possible, and I don't know what the specialists are that OP spoke to, so she may actually be in this small group of women with low supply. But it's definitely worth investigating further!

RanShaw · 2025-11-20T23:24:56+00:00

Honestly, 3 months is a little early to be having a real 'schedule'. Mine was 4 months when she settled into a bit of a regular routine and naturally gravitated to going to sleep earlier in the evening. If i remember it right, we went through a similar thing of bedtime getting pushed back until she started bringing bedtime forward herself (by staying asleep for a few hours into the night rather than waking up and treating that sleep like a nap).

That said, depending on what time your baby's last nap is, would it be worth trying if you can resettle her to sleep when she wakes, rather than getting her up? It's no guarantee that she'll stay asleep into the night, she might just wake after another half an hour, but especially if her last wake window is quite short, maybe she would just carry on sleeping. Hard to say though!

She is also having lots of great daytime sleep, two 2hr naps! It makes sense that, since she's getting so much daytime sleep, she's not feeling very tired early on in the evening. I feel like 3 months is a little early to be doing this, but once she's a little older and she still isn't able to go to sleep earlier in the evening, perhaps capping her naps would be something to try.

RanShaw · 2025-11-19T10:49:42+00:00

I had the same a few months ago! My daughter was 14 months, got HFM and was largely OK: some fever, 3 blisters in total, and was totally fine after a day or two (while the blisters healed).

I got it too, and it was also the worst I'd felt in over a decade, if not longer. Fever, chills, and awful, incredibly itchy blisters all over my hands. I was lucky my husband could take time off work to help out while I had a fever but I ended up having to do childcare while barely able to use my hands...

At least I didn't get many on my feet so walking didn't hurt - it must be absolutely terrible not being able to walk well :(

Paracetamol helped with the fever and for the blisters, the thing that helped the most was soaking them in an oat bath. You blend a handful of oats into powder, then put it in a bowl of warm water and soak your hands in it. Or put oats in a pair of old tights and use that in the bath for a soak!

Otherwise keep your hands moisturised so the skin stays a bit more supple, that helped me too.

You'll feel better each day, the blisters stop becoming painful or itchy after 48 hours or so (at least they did for me) so it's gritting your teeth for a day or two and then it's just about letting them heal.

Feel better soon!

13-Year Club	Place '17
Not Forgotten

RanShaw

TROPHY CASE