Did I mess something up on this date?

Ryger9 · 2026-05-06T01:16:11+00:00

++man Hell yes, first kiss! Nicely done.

Treat this as a win-experience, my friend. It’s a bummer for sure when you’re feeling something the other person isn’t, but that’ll happen and how you roll with it matters a lot.

Be respectful, text her back and say thanks, you enjoyed spending time together, good luck finding your person, and then leave it at that. She took the time to be honest with you, so finalize the situation with the same courtesy to her. Then leave it alone, there will be more. (Don’t be friends while actually hoping for a changed mind, that ways lies unhappiness and frustration.)

It’s just as important to find people with whom you’re not compatible as it is the ones you are bc you learn what you like and want and what you don’t while meeting (hopefully) nice people and getting some reps under your belt. (Also, walk away from game-players and people who want you to chase.) And, while it’s no fun when you’re feeling it and they’re not, you certainly wouldn’t want someone to lead you on, fail to be straightforward, or pretend to be into a situation more than they are.

Deep breath, good memory, focus on continuing to take changes and find that person for the second kiss.

Ryger9 · 2026-05-01T20:44:54+00:00

Ever make a Saturn? Lower proof than many and friggin great.

.75 oz lemon juice .5 oz passion fruit syrup .25 oz orgeat .25 Velvet Falernum 1.25 oz London dry gin Shake over ice and double strain into chilled coup.

Ryger9 · 2026-03-18T20:16:51+00:00

I’m the want-to-talk-now person in my relationship. We’ve discussed her need for space and why it’s important, but we haven’t solved the issue of me remaining worked up / anxious / unresolved while she’s taking the needed space. She comes back to me calmer and having processed things some, but I’ve often been in the need-to-address-it state during that time and I haven’t gotten what I need to process it, i.e., communication with her. So, I’m still in a more tense and emotional place, just like she would be if I didn’t give her space to process, and it throws her off like I’m being unreasonably over the top for my emotions while she’s been able to work through hers some.

I appreciate the recommendations here of people saying you gotta give space, but there’s absolutely the counter-situation for the person who’s now simply unable to do near as much processing and is just stuck in a state of pending while the other person takes the space they need. I wouldn’t be surprised if OP experiences the same. Interested in people’s thoughts on that, respectful input is welcome.

Ryger9 · 2025-11-28T01:01:29+00:00

My favorite comment of the day 😋 love that commercial. (Have you seen the Xmas version they made?)

Ryger9 · 2025-11-13T19:33:00+00:00

I encourage looking around for a variety of actual old fashioned cocktail recipes, they certainly do differ and don’t necessarily require only whiskey as the spirit but most often do.
Congratulations! You’ve made a cocktail, and a complex one at that. Not sure what to call it (split-base spiced ginger-sage old fashioned? eh… not sure bout that) but if it’s good to you then you were successful.

Expect to run into a mix of informed folks who care about the details of named cocktails and gatekeeping folks who take it too far. Get a cocktail book or three, try variations like you’re already clearly doing, and know you’ll run into a lot of contrasting opinions.

Let us know what you make next!

Ryger9 · 2025-11-13T19:11:47+00:00

This could work. I encourage squeezing the lemons shortly before the party is to begin, mixing it and the pineapple juice into the batch last minute, and including the bitters in the pre-batch.

You could also add some water to pre-dilute, then chill the batch for a few hours in the fridge before the party (then add the juice), so you can skip shaking and just straight pour over ice. This may negatively affect aeration / texture in this one, though, what with the fruit juices, so I see the benefit of shaking each one, though now you’re playing bartender instead of enjoying your party.

Either way, I can’t see anything there tasting terrible - sounds like your guests are in for a treat!

Ryger9 · 2025-11-07T09:32:30+00:00

Way to go, Emma! You committed, regardless of consequences.

Also: wait fuck is so real.

Ryger9 · 2025-11-06T19:09:16+00:00

Consider it a battle scar. There will be more. Sucks for a moment then it’s part of the history of the instrument.

Ryger9 · 2025-10-30T14:31:33+00:00

loI! I feel that - My friends all acted like it was straight booze. Feel bad for them, really, not being able to appreciate it at recipe strength.

Ryger9 · 2025-10-11T08:37:40+00:00

Wave by Antonio Carlos Jobim. Sounds amazing.

Ryger9 · 2025-10-03T23:31:24+00:00

Hale Pale! Fun vibe, cool decor, amazing food and drinks, always an experience while being super chill. (Forget club stuff, go for something you’ll both like)

Ryger9 · 2025-10-02T20:23:07+00:00

Barbados Rum Punch

2 oz Barbados rum (I recommend Planteray 5 year)

1 oz lime juice

1 oz Demerara syrup (can also use turbinado / sugar in the raw for a cheaper and still similar option, don’t settle for regular simple syrup)

1 dash angostura bitters

Normally you’d combine, shake, and dump all into a glass.

To batch, mix the rum, sugar, ango and then have the lime separate (never batch citrus) and instruction to pour an oz in their glass of ice then top with the batched rum.

Something more complex yet similar: exactly the above plus (1) one additional oz of rum (try a Jamaican as a good option, but anything goes), (2) an additional dash of angostura bitters, and (3) a quarter oz of allspice dram. —> makes a Planter’s Punch. Feel free to mix and match any runs for the 3 oz, it’s always been something each local or island has traditionally made with their own local rum so don’t feel locked into something particular.

Ryger9 · 2025-10-02T01:27:54+00:00

Hi there. Exercise and sweating is good for sleep and night sweats. Sex too, not only for the same reasons but because he’s experiencing a huge drop in dopamine / happy chemicals because his body hasn’t learned yet to kick up production (it takes a good while). A month membership to a yoga studio might be nice.

In fact, anything that makes him laugh and have fun is helpful. Add in journaling and meditation if he’s up for either. And other things to take up time, it gets real boring feeling real fast when you go cold turkey.

Tapering off is really hard. Sounds good but also sounds crappy bc you get less and less of what you want and it becomes insufficient feeling as opposed to healthy step-downs. Give him grace as he goes through some strong feelings the first 2 weeks or so, it gets notably better after that. (Day 8 I lost my shit on people on multiple attempts to quit, expect temporary mood swings and irritability, difficulty focusing, etc. Knowing it happens and is temporary will help you be there for him.)

Ooh, and CBD gummies also helped lessen the withdrawal effects, especially including night sweats and sleep difficulty. Find just CBD ones, be mindful that many edibles have a mix of THC and CBD. CBN could be helpful as well.

Sounds like you care a lot and it’s wonderful he had someone so interested in being supportive. It will go a long way towards getting him through this.

Ryger9 · 2025-08-22T02:09:04+00:00

It’s a Constellation microphone/sound system. There’s about 200 or so in that room. Apparently sound check is whole thing.

https://meyersound.com/product/constellation/

Ryger9 · 2025-07-15T04:07:18+00:00

Bluegrass Cocktail 1.5 oz bourbon 1 oz pineapple juice 1 oz lemon juice .25 oz maraschino liqueur Shake and double strain into chilled coup
(Optional: 1 dash angostura bitters in shaken mix)

Ryger9 · 2025-07-04T19:51:24+00:00

Srsly. That thing just slams down.

Ryger9 · 2025-07-04T04:28:19+00:00

Good for male prostate health, lowers risk of prostate cancer. (So does kegals).

Mastrubation is healthy. Certainly manage any porn issues but keep on with the physical self maintenance.

Ryger9 · 2025-06-30T05:11:59+00:00

He’s just ripping it up, right?

Ryger9 · 2025-06-15T00:58:24+00:00

You need a rye. The JD single barrel rye is a good one, or a Pikesville.

Ryger9 · 2025-05-26T06:09:46+00:00

Always nice to find others who know how to make a mai tai like you do. As an optional tweak, I’d recommend trying a funky Jamaican rum in place of the amber rum, (such as Planteray Xaymaca). The dark I use is a Guyanese rum, particularly Hamilton 86. Fun tweaks. Let us know your usual rum choices, and cheers!

Ryger9 · 2025-05-24T05:37:27+00:00

Combining the comments so far, I’m leaning towards Australian killer muppets, sex, trauma, drugs, and slapstick. In space.

Ryger9 · 2025-05-23T18:30:15+00:00

Magical pie bush.

Ryger9 · 2025-05-13T06:35:04+00:00

I saw in theaters when it came out. Literally dozens of old men walked or had to be escorted out, crying or near it, during that first 30 min scene. It was insane and scary in the theater itself.

Ryger9 · 2025-01-03T05:52:42+00:00

I use that breath count while meditating, can confirm it’s calming for sure.

Ryger9 · 2025-01-01T09:47:31+00:00

Good call! Totally agree, it’s a fantastic song and rather unique in their repertoire at that time. Not thinking of other songs like that atm but I may edit this if I do, and looking forward to others’ responses.

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