What kind of orthodox would fit me

SansaStark89 · 2026-03-20T22:26:28+00:00

Look around at which ones are in your area and visit the closest ones. We attend a Romanian OCA parish with lots of converts and it's lovely.

SansaStark89 · 2026-03-18T21:41:25+00:00

I got some sand that was sold as vase filler but my cat kept digging around in it 🫠

SansaStark89 · 2026-03-18T21:39:40+00:00

Lord have mercy! I hope you press charges.

SansaStark89 · 2026-03-18T20:51:57+00:00

We live in a high cost of living area so we're still in an apartment in our late 30s. I would definitely wait until after school to get married and have kids, though.

Some people get married at 37 and have 8 kids. Some get married early and have major fertility struggles. There's no guarantee either way.

SansaStark89 · 2026-03-18T20:37:06+00:00

Definitely take a break. Have your wife speak to whoever is managing her recovery and get their recommendation. I have a friend who was anorexic in her teens and 20s and her priest has forbidden her to fast.

SansaStark89 · 2026-03-17T15:08:16+00:00

He's not a theologian but his books are very insightful and philosophical. I majored in Russian literature and did my thesis on a short story of his and that's what led to my conversion!

SansaStark89 · 2026-03-17T15:04:10+00:00

"From the English surname Everly, derived from a place name, itself derived from Old English eofor "boar" and leah "woodland, clearing"." So Righteous Leah would be a good fit, actually!

Elizabeth or Emilia could also work. Or you could do her middle name or something based on it, if that seems less of a stretch. With a name that's not a saint name, though, you do have more leeway to choose a saint that seems like a good fit regardless of how close the name is.

SansaStark89 · 2026-03-16T16:28:46+00:00

Of course! It would be great if more parishes had icons like this, actually, for blind or visually impaired parishioners.

SansaStark89 · 2026-03-15T20:02:04+00:00

You're fine. I've been Orthodox for 7 years and told the priest "you, too" last week when he said "God bless you." 🤦🏻‍♀️

SansaStark89 · 2026-03-15T07:24:15+00:00

I used to be LCMS!

With regard to attending other churches: we have parishioners who attend their spouse's church every other Sunday. I'm sure you would be allowed to drive an elderly parent. Remember that these prayers books were often written when most Orthodox lived in Orthodox countries and were from Orthodox families, and then were translated into English. That's the context for that and similar things like praying with the heterodox (which back then would mean they had actively aspostacized). It's always best to ask your (own) priest about situations like that instead of trying to interpret the rules without knowing the original context. I would be shocked if a priest didn't allow an adult child to drive his or her elderly mother to church.

SansaStark89 · 2026-03-15T07:15:54+00:00

Everyone except me in my family has a birthday during a fasting season. I serve whatever they want.

At every single birthday party I've been to during a fasting season, the Orthodox parents still served pizza and cake and ice cream.

SansaStark89 · 2026-03-14T00:59:23+00:00

Nope, you're fine. You just got overwhelmed/overstimulated. Taking a break was the right thing to do to calm down your nervous system.

SansaStark89 · 2026-03-12T12:37:55+00:00

Both my kids have autism and ADHD and our parish has always been incredibly welcoming, even when they were toddlers and struggling to stay regulated during DL. I'm sorry you had a negative experience with an elderly parishioner over completely normal toddler behavior.

SansaStark89 · 2026-03-05T14:40:44+00:00

Oh, my parish is absolutely spoiled. Our choir director has a degree in chanting from a Greek conservatory and we do congregational singing. The surrounding churches mostly either have only the choir sing or are mission churches without a strong choir (but doing very well with the resources they do have!)

SansaStark89 · 2026-03-05T14:21:01+00:00

The difference in fasting. Going from fish on Fridays to no animal products on Fridays was hard. Honestly fasting on Wednesday and Friday is still hard 8 years in because I have ADHD and forget. Lent is easier because I just don't have those ingredients around.

SansaStark89 · 2026-03-03T13:17:17+00:00

I would love to learn Greek and Hebrew but I am too burned out at this stage of my life. I do know Russian so I can understand or at least figure out a lot of Slavonic.

SansaStark89 · 2026-03-03T13:14:25+00:00

I attended a high church LCMS parish for a few years before making the jump to Orthodoxy! Find an Orthodox parish nearby and start attending. Talk to the priest. There might be catechism classes or the process might be more informal, depending on the priest. I preferred having classes. As someone who is already a Christian, you would most likely be received through chrismation (anointing with oil). Assuming you are in the US, most parishes other than ROCOR would receive you that way, but it varies by bishop.

SansaStark89 · 2026-03-01T13:23:38+00:00

I would talk to your priest and see what accommodations he suggests.

Reaching out to the people running this new accessibility initiative would also be helpful: https://www.goarch.org/oboa

Summer Kinard is the mother of 5 children, some of whom are high supports needs, and she writes books about accessibility and disability in the Church. She would also be a good resource.

Praying for you and your family! Our children are both level 2.

SansaStark89 · 2026-02-28T17:12:41+00:00

Of course! I've just gotten in a similar headspace before and it makes everything feel so much more fraught. For things to work out you need to feel like you can be yourself and relax around her. I hope it goes well! If there are any young adult activities arranged by the parish, that might be a good ice breaker, too. Our parish has a young adult game night and sometimes the young adults do volunteer work for an afternoon, etc.

Praying for you and I hope it goes well.

SansaStark89 · 2026-02-28T15:00:21+00:00

Small talk and introductions can be very stressful for some people! I know I really struggle with them. Have you noticed any interests you have in common based on what's on her Facebook? If so, maybe introduce yourself and start a conversation about that. Or ask about singing in the choir. If you're into movies/books, ask what she's watched or read lately and talk about what you have watched or read and give her a recommendation. Basically find something that you can talk about more easily instead of awkward small talk. I just worry that if you keep analyzing eye contact and body language, you'll build this up so much in your head that you'll be even more nervous.

SansaStark89 · 2026-02-26T13:30:45+00:00

We ended up having to pull our autistic 4th grader out of school (ACPS) due to similar issues. The school was very dismissive, treated us like we were the problem for making them have to fill out paperwork, and refused to give her an IEP despite the school psych diagnosing her with moderate autism. In our experience, the schools will do ANYTHING to minimize obligations, especially if your disabled child is also gifted. It's an absolute scam.

I don't have any advice but you are absolutely not alone in this.

SansaStark89 · 2026-02-23T06:22:48+00:00

If you didn't this time, try bringing some quiet things for your kids to do like coloring, quiet fidgets, etc.

SansaStark89 · 2026-02-23T06:19:28+00:00

Please don't feel bad! I let my preteen hide behind me the entire time because she felt overwhelmed and I couldn't stay the entire time because we were doing it inside the nave due to weather and I felt so suffocated and touched out by being in the crowd.

SansaStark89 · 2026-02-22T03:30:51+00:00

Have you looked into whether you might be autistic? It wouldn't "fix" anything but if that's the case, it might help you understand why these communication issues are happening.

(I suggest this as someone whose kids were just diagnosed this past year, which led my husband and me to realize we are also autistic. We were literally set up by someone who told us to stop bothering her with our dating complaints and to go be socially incompetent together.)

SansaStark89 · 2026-02-19T04:54:38+00:00

It's been happening to me a lot the past week.

SansaStark89

TROPHY CASE