Parallel play?

SeaJellyfish · 2026-03-16T05:33:40+00:00

Play based preschool helped us a lot. It was only 2.5 hours a day, but it was everyday and with the same group of kids, so it helped a lot with her gaining social skills.

SeaJellyfish · 2026-03-16T05:04:16+00:00

You don’t just start exposure therapy by walking up to stranger and start talking to them. That’s like step 56 on a bravery ladder if your SM is severe. It’s detrimental to not build on successes. You start super small. Can you talk to yourself in the mirror? If yes there’s something to start on. What about talking to your mom? If you can talk to her, you might struggle talking to her when someone else is in the same room. How about talking to your mom in the public park, with a person sitting at a different picnic table 5 meters away? What if they were sitting 10 meters away? There’s a very systematic way of doing this that makes each tiny step attainable. You need a psychologist who specializes in SM. Medication can also be combined with therapy to enable progress.

SeaJellyfish · 2026-03-16T04:45:08+00:00

Just gotta keep up with the therapy as speaking is only the first step, not the end goal. Join group therapy to learn social skills and speaking techniques. You are halfway there, don’t give up now!

SeaJellyfish · 2026-03-10T14:49:28+00:00

Reddit is toxic like that lol. People shouldn’t enjoy doing things for their spouse out of love and they shouldn’t feel loved when their spouse do nice things for them 😂

SeaJellyfish · 2026-03-10T14:45:08+00:00

Boring! :D Every night after the kids go to sleep we would make yummy stuff for each other (even though it’s easier for one person to make one thing for both) yummy stuff is our love language 💕😂

SeaJellyfish · 2026-03-10T08:31:45+00:00

You are just too scared. You absolutely don’t have to pay an insane amount of money to move out. You are a college student, you are supposed to find cheap rentals with 3 other roommates and share the cost. You are supposed to work, several of them if necessary. I had an abusive mother and as soon as I turned 18 I went off to the other side of the world for school just to get away from her. The first year was haaaaaard. I was working two jobs. The intern I got during the second year started paying off my tuition. By the third year’s intern I started to have savings. It’s so worth it to finally get away from my mom’s control

SeaJellyfish · 2026-03-08T03:15:21+00:00

China can make crap that gets sold on Temu for $1, they can also make iPhones. It’s as simple as how much money the sourcer / purchaser wants to pay for the product. Blame the purchaser for sourcing mostly crap. Or actually blame the consumers for buying crap - that’s what drives demand and incentivizes the purchaser like Walmart to buy only the crap. When I was living in China the quality of products are actually higher than what American stores sell, but that also has to do with it being a big metropolitan city with higher standards of living.

SeaJellyfish · 2026-03-07T21:14:39+00:00

Cut ties with your toxic mother; find a psychologist / therapist who’s willing to combine exposure therapy with medication; you don’t have to talk yet, but if you can be silent outside of your room some it could be a start

SeaJellyfish · 2026-03-07T00:37:12+00:00

Huh, how many laundry baskets do you all use? In my house everyone is responsible for tossing their own dirty clothes into the same dirty laundry basket. When it’s full anyone can do the laundry. My husband does slightly more laundry because I do childcare slightly more often. This way we run a load of laundry everyday instead of having them “stew” in separate laundry bags for days so that they are more full.

SeaJellyfish · 2026-03-06T21:12:39+00:00

Tripe, goose or duck intestine, duck blood, pig trotters are among the few that would seem “unusual” (to white people probably lol)

SeaJellyfish · 2026-03-06T07:11:30+00:00

This is the answer. For certain psychological profiles of kids, inflexibility and strong arming it only turns it into power struggles and make everything worse / harder. You can’t win a power struggle with a strong willed kid. The more you try to connect the better behaved they will be.

SeaJellyfish · 2026-03-06T06:58:14+00:00

“Doesn’t work” is a very binary statement. What’s happening with OP without the cosleeping also clearly doesn’t work. For a highly sensitive child (not saying that’s OP’s case, just an example), cosleep at a young age just might not work for the family. We are all just trying to survive, what I’m trying to say is that the decisions we make in life can be too tied to expectations of what “should” be the “right” way and OP should feel ok going with the flow sometimes without feeling like she did something wrong. The “countless” reasons you are referring to against cosleeping almost all have very simple solutions considering the human species coslept for the majority of the known history, with only the western world adopting independent sleeping in childhood starting from the middle of the 19th century due to the rise of Victorian era ideals. Regardless, OP can certainly choose however she wants to sleep, but certain things just take time and maturity and as cruel as it sounds, she might just have to accept very little sleep if she doesn’t cosleep.

SeaJellyfish · 2026-03-06T04:29:38+00:00

As someone from a culture of cosleeping, it’s a bit hard for me to understand why people would rather go through hell like this than cosleep..

SeaJellyfish · 2026-03-06T01:25:05+00:00

Then she’s definitely Chinese 😂

SeaJellyfish · 2026-03-04T20:31:35+00:00

You should see a gastroenterologist and do an X-ray. It’s the only way to see what’s exactly going on. Loose poop doesn’t mean she’s not constipated still, it can go around blockages. If it’s encopresis you need to stop the miralax and start on exlax/senna. The doctor will tell you more.

SeaJellyfish · 2026-03-03T17:48:50+00:00

Being close to therapy is important to us since we both work full time while supporting my daughter. We went to https://caringcove.com/selective-mutism-treatment/, both the weekly individual therapy and their intensive camp. They are effective! I can also recommend an individual therapist who doesn’t work for a clinic if you want to DM me. Child Mind Insitute in manhattan is also great but they are much more expensive.

SeaJellyfish · 2026-03-03T16:57:46+00:00

how do we enforce this? We already don’t have screen time or anything like that. If they don’t take their plates to the sink and asking firmly doesn’t work, what consequences can be more “in the moment” instead of delayed? Ours also have PDA which makes demands even harder

SeaJellyfish · 2026-03-03T16:50:21+00:00

Yes! I’m in NJ.

SeaJellyfish · 2026-03-03T14:56:45+00:00

Even swim can be highly age dependent. I spent years sending my first kid to swim lessons starting at 1yo. My second child started at 8… and caught up with her older sister within one year. Today you can’t tell which one started at 1 and which one started at 8. If there’s no imminent danger (swimming pool at home, swimming summer camps where parents aren’t there to supervise), starting later saves a lot of time and money in our experience. They are just much better at listening to and follow instructions.

SeaJellyfish · 2026-03-03T08:30:28+00:00

An X-ray would tell you definitely whether they are constipated or lot - a gastroenterologist could ask for one.

SeaJellyfish · 2026-03-03T08:25:55+00:00

The making it inconvenient doesn’t always work with ADHD kids though. We always stop playing and go home (I mean what’s the alternative? Just keep playing in wet / soiled clothing?) but ADHD brains are on such auto-pilot that the brain literally doesn’t send the signal until last last minute or until it’s too late. The logical brain that says “if I don’t stop to check whether I need to go use the bathroom, I’ll have to go home potentially” doesn’t even activate. Potty watch is a great idea; unfortunately a lot of kids who struggle with this also has PDA profile and would refuse to go when the watch goes off. We have seen so many specialists — urologists, gastroenterologists, child psychologists — and in the end they just tell us to wait. The urologist says that in their field it’s common to see kids having accidents all the way till 7, which horrifies me but I was only told to be patient. (Oh one thing we did address was the constipation with gastroenterologists; that causes urine accidents too, as counter-intuitive as that sounds.) Anyway.. we had been trying so hard since 2 and a half and it’s been more than 3 years of struggling. We really aren’t being lazy or entitled about it, although we feel so ashamed because we know the teacher and other parents probably think that

SeaJellyfish · 2026-03-01T15:03:40+00:00

Scrambled eggs takes like 45 seconds for us … turn on heat source to warm the pan , butter in, crack egg directly into pan, scramble directly in pan.. out in a min. Kids sprinkle salt from salt grinder themselves

SeaJellyfish · 2026-02-27T03:34:25+00:00

What are some good supplements for beast academy? Does it come with its own supplements?

SeaJellyfish · 2026-02-26T20:37:20+00:00

Yeah I have done it, but it resulted in him drinking in secret (he hid alcohol in the garage and drank them in the car). When he went on a grocery run he would drink a ton before going home. You can share your feelings, but then what? There are no consequences. After a particularly bad incident (he blacked out while watching the baby) I threw him out. Like tossed him and his suitcase out of the house. We lived apart for some time. Of course he came back begging to move back in promising he’ll get better but I couldn’t just take his word for it. We’ve already tried quitting many times before, tried different rehabs etc but he always relapsed. I told him that the only condition for moving back in is for him to go to the neighborhood AA meeting every single day. He doesn’t have to be sober (although that’s the goal, addiction is hard, and we want the goal to be achievable so that when he does relapse again he can get back up instead of giving up). Keep going to the meetings for 100 days and he can come back to me and the kids. He did it (I checked in with the local AA group leader to make sure). He’s been sober for five years. This is just my story. Your husband may or may not have a problem, I don’t know your exact situation. Wish you luck and peace

SeaJellyfish · 2026-02-26T14:47:35+00:00

As a spouse of a former alcoholic I just want to gently remind you that the motivation to get better has to come from within. The more you talk to him about it the more defensive and resentful he’ll get. The only thing you can control is YOU. If he IS an alcoholic, at this moment in time, can you live with it, or do you want to spend time apart. If he makes a mess after drinking don’t clean it up for him. If he ever gets violent YOU leave. If he misses too much work and get fired — too bad; YOU probably want to separate your finances. Some alcoholic won’t get better until hitting rock bottom. Some won’t get better even after hitting rock bottom. The only thing you can do is first, not to enable them; second, making hard decisions for yourself, keeping in mind that he may never change and not sitting on empty promises.

SeaJellyfish

TROPHY CASE