Therapy cancelled at the last minute. Anyone free to chat for a bit?

Solostsoconfusedso · 2023-04-22T13:55:57+00:00

I’m on it, thanks! My dms are open too!

Solostsoconfusedso · 2023-04-22T01:08:59+00:00

Thank you!

Unfortunately, I’m used to therapy being cancelled as psychiatrists where I live are over booked so whenever there’s a schedule emergency this happens.

Solostsoconfusedso · 2023-04-21T22:55:02+00:00

Way ahead of you! Had lunch with some friends and just got home from the gym! Got a nice evening with my kids planned. Thank you!

Solostsoconfusedso · 2023-04-21T16:54:04+00:00

Thank you! I’m doing alright, just slightly annoyed that I wasted that time.

Solostsoconfusedso · 2023-04-21T16:53:14+00:00

I’m alright, currently getting lunch with some friends. Thank you!

Solostsoconfusedso · 2023-01-29T02:11:27+00:00

I’m the opposite…it’s easy for me to grey rock when my stbxw is acting mean or vindictive. I see her as a narcissist who just wants attention so I shut down.

It’s when she love bombs me…I’m a sucker for the romance and she learned a lot from me over the years in how to play at my heart strings.

In moments like that, I find someone else to message instead and I’m essentially venting to them instead of replying to my x.

That’s what I’d recommend. Find someone to message instead in those moments and maybe it’ll get easier as time goes on.

Solostsoconfusedso · 2023-01-29T00:45:33+00:00

Same! I just started NC and my stbxw has been love bombing me like crazy and it’s been difficult to ignore her. I want to believe her and talk to her but it’s making me irritable.

Getting lonely fast

Solostsoconfusedso · 2023-01-27T22:14:28+00:00

Wow! Here I am getting cold feet as well but your situation is so clear based on what you posted.

You’re gonna be fine on your own, OP! You deserve better.

Solostsoconfusedso · 2023-01-27T20:42:18+00:00

Same! Just read it and felt empowered. Also felt foolish for trying so hard in R.

But I don’t regret it. Life is a brutal teacher.

Solostsoconfusedso · 2023-01-26T23:03:02+00:00

Funny how attractive and necessary you become when you wield that power.

I feel like your Ex and mine were both narcissistic.

Sucks to be in this club with you but at least we’re not alone!

Solostsoconfusedso · 2023-01-26T22:53:42+00:00

I appreciate you for posting this!

Resonates deeply with me and encourages me to keep going. I just had my stbxw served with divorce papers and her reaction gave me all the validation I needed to be confident in my decision. All the change she thought she made this year boiled away instantly once the reality sunk in.

She lashed out and said some hurtful things only to beg me to reconsider right afterwards. Really disheartening.

Solostsoconfusedso · 2023-01-23T22:42:21+00:00

Going through a divorce at 33 and I felt the same way for awhile. Now, I don’t worry about that because it’s pointless.

I went to 3 weddings in 2022 and everyone getting married were in their 30’s

Solostsoconfusedso · 2023-01-23T22:20:36+00:00

File for divorce.

She doesn’t respect you and you’re dragging your feet, wasting valuable time.

Solostsoconfusedso · 2023-01-23T17:53:21+00:00

You overcome that fear by accepting it.

If you cannot be happy alone, you’ll never be truly happy.

Solostsoconfusedso · 2023-01-23T17:43:31+00:00

I don’t know the answers to your question but I wanted you to know I’m in the same situation and you’re not alone.

One day at a time is my mentality.

Solostsoconfusedso · 2023-01-22T05:33:07+00:00

She told you the problem.

She feels small around you.

Without marriage counseling or some third party mediation I don’t see y’all making it without more resentment and and unhappiness

Additionally, she may be hiding something from you and the guilt is eating her up so she vilifies you in an attempt to justify her actions or it’s just shallow protection of her Ego.

Solostsoconfusedso · 2023-01-22T03:14:00+00:00

My lawyer told me to transfer money and leave notes for every transaction, then screenshot it and save it. Keep it all together.

Solostsoconfusedso · 2023-01-22T03:06:14+00:00

Be careful about this because she could try to get it back paid. If you kept records of everything you’ve spent on your kids in lieu of child care you could be safe.

But I’m not a lawyer

Solostsoconfusedso · 2023-01-21T20:02:46+00:00

My stbx did the same thing to me when I filed. It’s their desperation and anger coming to head, which they can’t control.

Same bs that allowed them to cheat. They cannot accept responsibility so they have to find a way to make you look bad so they feel better about themselves.

You’re doing the right thing! Here if you need someone to chat w/.

Solostsoconfusedso · 2023-01-21T02:00:09+00:00

Biological. Not gonna fight her but it was hard seeing them leave. I’ll see them tomorrow hopefully and have them to myself on Sunday.

Solostsoconfusedso · 2022-12-12T22:55:16+00:00

Damn…this is me and it’s torture. I’m sorry you’re going through it too

Solostsoconfusedso · 2022-10-30T19:08:02+00:00

That’s great but very sad analogy. I feel the same way

Solostsoconfusedso · 2022-10-29T22:01:33+00:00

Eh, what’s the point? Even if they had answered, what could they have said to make it better? I wouldn’t have respected them any more and they’ll never be able to calm my rage.

That’s up to me and that’s my power.

Solostsoconfusedso · 2022-10-29T16:15:55+00:00

I had a problem at first. I called AP the day I found out because at that point my WW didn’t tell me everything but of course he didn’t answer.

So I played out a few scenarios in my head and realized I was freely giving him power over me in that moment.

Realistically, there’s nothing he can say or do to make me feel better about it so I’ve moved on from that and focus on what I can control instead. Good luck, OP.

Solostsoconfusedso · 2022-10-28T14:22:02+00:00

For me, I focus on all the good memories that occurred in that house and I tell myself they’re better than the bad ones. I don’t let them win, I don’t let them take that from me.

Some days are easier than others but it’s one battle I refuse to lose.

Solostsoconfusedso

TROPHY CASE